Protected Pain
by Jingyee1511
Summary: COMPLETE. Inuyasha chose Kikyo, and Kagome is left with Koga to deal with the hurt. Now Kikyo is dead, and Inuyasha is back- but his coldness just hurts Kagome even further. What if Koga decides that the only way to protect Kagome is to seal her memory?
1. Out of The Well

**Chapter 1: Out of The Well**

**Disclaimer: Rumiko Takahashi owns Inuyasha manga, anime, characters, storyline, etc...**

**The first chapter may be a bit messy, sorry about that, because i have a great problem with startings... Please take it that the context of this fanfic is after Castle Beyond the Looking Glass and Swords of an Honourable Ruler, okay? But before the birth of the mind reading demon? Please read and review!...**

**Now for the story.  
**

* * *

"Sis, are you sure you can fit all these in?" Souta asked, eyeing the pile of food by the yellow bag pack. Apart from the usual ramen, potato chips and candy bars, there were bars of chocolate, fishes prepared by Mother and also a can of glucose! His hands inched towards the can of chips.

The instant he touched the can, Kagome swatted his hand away.

"Sis!"

"I don't require you to lighten my load, Souta," she said, picking up the can and placing it in her bag.

"What's with the chocolate anyway?" Souta asked edgily.

"That's for Sango. She's not taking it well that Kohaku was taken away again, when we all thought Naraku was gone for good." Kagome thought of how Naraku emerged from Kohaku's back, and shuddered.

"Fish for the cat demon?"

"Certainly. Kirara needs a treat now and then," Kagome answered, as the last of the food went into the bag. "Bye, Mum! Bye, grandpa! Bye, Souta! Don't touch my things!"she called, as she raced towards the well.

_I wonder how the gang's coping on the other side,_ Kagome thought as she jumped into the pitch black interior of the well. The place held so many memories… The first time he came over to our side, when he'd just about given us all a heart attack… The hundreds of ways he used to stop me returning home… The first time I saw him… The well, the link back to the Sengoku period. The link to Inuyasha. _Inuyasha._

Inuyasha. The feeling of his arms around her, the feeling of his chest against hers, the feeling of his lips on hers…

_Get a grip on yourself, Kagome! _She told herself, trying to calm her racing heart. She could already feel the heat on her cheeks. This was so not the way for Sango to see her.

"Hey guys!" Kagome said, stepping into Kaede's hut. A ball of orange fur collided with her face, preceding the chorus of "Kagome!"s and "Welcome back"s. However, a particular hanyou was not to be seen.

After unpacking the "ninja food" and helping Lady Kaede prepare dinner, Kagome tried to sound nonchalant as she asked where Inuyasha was.

"He was sitting on Goshinboku the last time I saw him," Shippo said, his mouth full of chocolate cookies.

Kagome murmured about getting him for dinner, before rushing out into the night.

The gang exchanged a significant glance, smirks on their faces.

"Would it be surprising if Lady Kagome took an hour to locate Inuyasha?" Miroku asked, looking amused.

"Don't go barging in on them on purpose, Miroku," Sango warned. "I'd like peace and quiet, for a change."

"And intimacy, Sango dear?" Miroku asked, as his left hand wrapped around Sango's waist and pulled her close, nuzzling her face. The right hand, however, reached down to touch a _particular _place.

A resounding slap rang through the area like a gunshot, frightening the birds out of their nests.

* * *

Kagome giggled at the mental image of Miroku supporting a cheek with an imprint of Sango's palm. _Some people just never change_, she thought. She could just briefly make out Goshinboku in the distance and was just about to call out to Inuyasha when she heard him talking.

"You once said that my life belonged to you. Then, your life… it belongs to me, Kikyo."

_Inuyasha and Kikyo! What? Why? What's going on? What happened when I was back in my time…?_

"No matter what you think of me now, I don't care. But I'll never let Naraku get you! I'm the only one who can protect you, Kikyo!"

Kagome hid behind a tree, hands cupping her ears, her head buzzing. She froze as she saw Inuyasha embrace Kikyo. She felt ill, and it took all her concentration to block out the next few minutes. She didn't want to hear it.

"_Kikyo!"_

Kagome's eyes snapped open as Inuyasha's cry shattered the stillness of the night. Kikyo had gone with her soul collectors, leaving Inuyasha under the tree. And there he stood, statue-like, where Kikyo left him, gazing at the sky with nothing but longing and affection in his eyes. Her heart spasmed with pain, and she slid a little down the tree trunk, causing some of the bark to give way.

Alerted by the soft snap, Inuyasha turned around, scanning the trees for sign of the noise.

Up 'til now, he didn't realize me. Not my scent, only Kikyo's. Not any sound, but Kikyo's. For some reason, although something in me screamed against it, I stood up and faced Inuyasha. Not my Inuyasha, but the hanyou of 50 years ago.

The air between us were still. Cold. Relentless.

"Kagome."

Instead of the heart warming effects the word usually held, all instincts screamed at me to run. To break the gaze. To go. Before it was too late.

Yet I didn't. I had no control over my wobbling legs.

"I'm sorry, Kagome. Please understand that I cannot leave Kikyo. She's all I ever wanted, the first person who ever cared, the person I love most in this world. I love Kikyo. You were only her replacement."

It can't be… Kagome thought, as the words shredded her heart. It was a curious sensation, as she felt both the pain triggered by the words, the numbness as she looked at Inuyasha, and denial, all at once.

"You… never… cared?" Kagome whispered, a lump rising in her throat.

"Never."

Kagome looked helplessly at him, trying to find a drop of untruth in his amber eyes. There weren't any.

"I will never be able to give Kikyo up. So, Kagome, we part ways here," Inuyasha said, pulling off the golden locket Kagome gave him. "Say good bye to the gang for me," he added. In a flash, he was gone.

I sank to my knees. The pain in my heart and mind was too strong for me to understand anything but the fact that I never had a place in Inuyasha's heart. I was simply Kikyo's replacement. I was nothing compared to her.

_Some people never change. Inuyasha's love for Kikyo will never change. I will never see Inuyasha again._

With that, I was thrown into a pitch black abyss as the pain devoured me, just as the rain clouds started forming.

* * *

"It's too long, Miroku!" Sango snapped. She did not find Miroku's suggestion that Inuyasha was getting 'personal' with Kagome funny. It was obvious that the two loved each other, but that was not the point. "Call it a woman's intuition if you please, but I think something's wrong!"

"Like what?" Miroku asked, popping open a can of coke. "Nothing can go wrong with Inuyasha around."

"But Inuyasha might not be there!" Sango said, rolling her eyes.

"Do tell why not."

"STOP!" Shippo bellowed, as Sango opened her mouth to reply. "Listen to me, okay? Inuyasha and Kagome are grown ups, so we don't need to know what they are doing every second."

The monk and the youkai exterminator looked at each other, thinking the same thing: _Since when had Shippo become so grown up????_

"I suggest that ye wait a little longer," Lady Kaede murmured. "If they don't return, ye should go and look for them."

Miroku nodded, and Sango reluctantly followed suit. Staring out at the pitch dark surroundings, she could not help but shudder at the feeling of impending doom.


	2. A New Power

**Disclaimer: Oops. Yes, i do know that this belongs to Rumiko Takahashi. **

**Chapter Two: Changes**

**Please read and review!!  
**

* * *

Inuyasha jumped form the branch and began running on the grass. After Kikyo journeyed on air out of the immediate area, she had started walking. Where to? He looked up at the rain clouds, and estimated that it would start raining in thirty minutes. If he couldn't find Kikyo by then, her scent would be washed away and he would have t search very hard to find her. He sighed as Kagome's crushed look crept into his mind and made his heart pang. To be honest, he loved both Kagome and Kikyo, but owed it to Kikyo. And it would be unfair to both of them when he stayed with Kagome, yet could not give up Kikyo. He lied to Kagome, that she was a replacement of Kikyo… And when he returned the locket to her, the way she looked… he could hardly harden his heart to leave. And yet, he could not leave Kikyo like that.

"I'm sorry, Kagome," the hanyou whispered as he caught up with a particular miko.

* * *

"Shippo, grab that torchlight, will you?" Sango called as Miroku stepped behind her.

"Let's get going," Miroku said, holding an umbrella above their heads.

"We should have gone a long time ago," hissed Sango. "Let's go, Kirara."

The forest was so dark now. In this time period, unlike the one Kagome-chan describes as her hometown, monsters of the dark were not just myths to scare little children, they were real. With Inuyasha around, Kagome should be safe- but her intuition told her something was wrong. Definitely wrong.

"You look beautiful, Sango," Miroku whispered in her ear, "Even when you're angry." He brushed his nose against her cheek. Sango shivered, whether from the weather or from the action she did not know.

Miroku knew he was forgiven. He smiled as he tightened his hold on Sango's waist, and pulled Sango's face close to his. Her eyes widened- how he loved those brown eyes- and before she could react-

_Naraku loomed before them._

Generally, the sight of Naraku would make his guts churn, but this time it didn't, and he knew why.

It was a particular _Naraku_ with a bushy orange tail.

"SHIPPO!" Miroku roared, as he rose his staff.

"I only wanted to remind you two that we're looking for Kagome!" Shippo whined as the staff made contact with his fox skull.

"Shut up, you two!" ordered a blushing Sango. "I think I saw Kagome! Kirara, go!"

* * *

Kagome didn't know the gang had arrived until Sango knelt down beside her, and asked her where Inuyasha was.

"He's gone. With Kikyou," she heard her hoarse voice tell Sango. On one hand, she felt her stinging eyes and sore muscles, on the other hand, she felt nothing. A deep, dull, throbbing ache, yes, but nothing more. She could not focus on anything. Her heart craved something forbidden, some silver haired and golden eyed person… but her brain prevented her from dredging up images of him. It led to a great compressing feeling, and both want and hate for the hanyou in her. But the barrier in her mind built was steel hard. And icy cold. Subconsciously, her heart reached out towards the love enclosed in the barrier, something Kagome did always, around him. Then her insides would feel frozen, the fiery passion enclosed in a cage of ice and pain. But it left emptiness, all the space where she loved Inu- no, she could not think the name. It was not permitted thus.

Kagome didn't know she was being moved until Kirara launched into the sky, nearly unseating her. She thought she heard Shippo whisper, "I'll keep it for now," and a metallic clanging noise. Something stirred within her, beating against the unyielding barrier, fighting for her to remember, but could not reach her. Something… Golden.

Her legs closed in around Kirara. Kagome was surprised to find that her muscles were all sore. Briefly, she wondered how long she had been kneeling down. An hour, a minute or a second? Time mattered not, now.

What should she do now? Now that _he_ had Kikyou by his side to search for the shards, she could go back, couldn't she? She could go back and be a normal girl… back to Japan… What could she do here anyway? She was a nuiscence, he told her that. She was nothing compared to Kikyou's power…

"Don't go, Kagome. Inuyasha's gone, but the rest of us need you! We want you around!" Shippo whined. "We have to defeat Naraku, or Miroku will die, and Kohaku will never go back to Sango! We need you, Kagome!" as they reached the hut.

Had she been voicing out her thoughts? She couldn't tell.

_Inuyasha._

"Lady Kaede! Lady Kaede! Please save my girl! Please help her!" begged a hysterical mother, carrying a girl in blue yukata. "She tripped and fell against a sharp rock as she was rushing home! Lady Kaede, save her!" She put the injured girl in the doorway as Lady Kaede emerged.

_Desperation. The same desperation she felt as Inuyasha left her for Kikyou._

The girl's face was drained of blood, and she clenched her fists as she fought tears. Blood was flowing from the deep cut, but not enough to block the view of her shin bone.

_Braveness. The little girl could stand mortal pain._

_So will I._

Her legs pulled her, as if in a trance, to the girl, and knelt down for the second time today. Kagome pressed her palm gently against the girl's wound, causing her to gasp. A bright golden glow burst out from her palm, as Kagome's heart began to warm up.

_This would be what I'll stay here for._

_To fight Naraku, to help others._

Gradually, the glow dimmed and extinguished. The miko removed her hand, revealing the unblemished skin of the girl's shin, with no reminder of the nasty accident except dried blood. Kagome was suddenly aware of seven pairs of eyes staring at her.

Kagome whispered, "I hope this helps," as she turned and walked into the hut.

_This would be why I stay here._

_

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**Sorry for the late update... How's this chapter? Better than the first? Please review!! Thank you!! **


	3. Barriers

**Chapter Three: Barriers**

**Disclaimer: If you don't know that Rumiko Takahashi owns Inuyasha by now, I am amazed that you found yourself here. =)**

**Notes:**

**Thanks a real lot for the reviews! Um... in one review someone expressed the feelings that he/she did not like the pairing. Well, i am not surprised, actually. Er... I have to apologise to everyone, coz i do know that everyone generally would like Inuyasha to pair with Kagome. Jokingly, my friend told me my storyline was pretty risky, coz if i mess up, the fans of InuKag would come after me, hurling knives. A knife has reached me already...? haha.  
But a correction to what the reviewer thought. I AM NOT PLANNING FOR INUYASHA TO END UP WITH KIKYO. He'll be with Kagome, that i can assure you- after a big roundabout though. Why then do i not write it thus? By now, i suppose it's obvious that i specialise not in happy stories, but mainly sad ones. My previous two fanfics, not well done, i have to say, were all surrounded in sorrow. How then do i write about the sorrow? What, make Inuyasha detest Kagome permanently? Surely not!  
Although it may currently seem so in Protected Pain, but that's not the result i am attempting to write about. I swear that i personally don't love it when Kikyo ends with Inuyasha in the end. I am trying to get all the 2 love triangles into this fanfic... in the meantime, the different, more disliked pairings will come in... sorry people, but the ending i am trying to make it that it all was tests of their love. Hopefully you will stay with the story until then, and bear with whatever disagreeable things that come in the equation.**

**Thanks for living through that long monologue- now, for the story.  
**

* * *

"So that's what happened," mumbled Kaede. The chirping of cicadas only amplified the silence that filled the hut. The thing is that, while everyone looked to her for explanation of the miracle, she had seen nothing of the sort. Kikyou onee-sama was gifted with great purifying powers, and needed nearly no training for sealing and creating barriers. But healing? Kagome had accomplished something extremely rare and valuable, and she told it to her audience.

"But it's an interesting twist," she added. Sango had related to her what had happened, and the state in which they found Kagome. It was just as well that several parents from the village looked to Kagome to heal their recently-injured children the following day, and they were trying out with two kids plagued with illnesses. Kagome did not have to be reminded of her loss. Kaede always knew that Inuyasha would feel indebted to her sister, but it never occurred to her to expect Inuyasha to leave with her. When they were younger, she thought Inuyasha would become human and stay… It never happened thus.

Back to the question… What, Kagome had been hurt severely internally- thus could heal physically? It made no sense, unless something else was in the equation. What could have caused it? Was it something she saw that night that triggered it, or did the incident bring out a hidden power within her?

"Kagome-chan, you are back! How are the kids? How are Tia-chan and Yunno-kun now?" Sango asked as Kagome came around the corner. Simultaneously, everyone in the hut pretended to have been doing something all along- Kaede pounding herbs that had been pounded hours ago, Miroku drawing sutras on his hand instead of on paper, Shippo sticking his hand into an empty can of chips and Kirara licking her paw.

The young miko smiled, but the joy did not reach her eyes. The chocolate brown eyes showed nothing but anguish, ever since Inuyasha's departure.

"The children healed perfectly. As for Yuuno and Tia, I am still experimenting. I have healed whatever the germs destroyed, and have strengthened their body's antibodies- the rest would be up to them."

"Does it drain ye power, Kagome?"

The miko stared into space, and thoughtfully mumbled, "It does. And concentration seems to be a vital part of the ingredients…" Then, she met their eyes. "Lady Kaede. I found out something… interesting… today."

"Oh?"

Kagome nodded. She paused, as though pondering how to phrase the experience. "When I was trying to help Tia, the drain in power was nearly too much to let me concentrate. I believed that I could not do it, and as I was heading back… Tia's mother held onto my arm."

She paused, and stared intently at the elder miko.

"Lady Kaede, I am positive I felt the strength in her being released! And when I changed my mind about not helping Tia…

"Her strength flowed into me. That's why I was well enough to return."

A stunned silence followed, and Kagome stared down at her feet, waiting.

Miroku was the first to recover.

"Lady Kaede, could Tia's mother have exceptional spiritual power? Could this be a reaction between two mikos?"

"No, Tia's mother is not a miko. I tested every girl in the village for their spiritual powers, for someone to continue the legacy. For the other question… I doubt so. In fact, I am inclined to think that that is another gift. Kagome, let's have you try once more."

Kagome, with preoccupied eyes, clasped hands with the elder. A split second later, Kagome's eyes widened.

"I feel it!"

"Try to take the energy, then."

Kaede felt a sensation akin to attraction of magnets- where the magnet was in her, wanting to flow to Kagome, whose eyes were squeezed shut in concentration. After an agonizing half minute, Kagome sighed and the sucking feeling vanished on Kaede's palm.

"Try again," Kaede instructed, as she mentally agreed to let Kagome take the energy. At Kagome's beckoning, the power rushed from her, and she gasped at the sudden drain of energy.

"Oh my gosh, I'm sorry!" Kagome chanted, as the power flowed from Kagome, back to her.

"What's going on?" Sango demanded, echoing the gang's thoughts.

"It's amazing," Kaede rasped. "Kagome's power is more than what I thought."

* * *

"And the only flaw is that the owner must _agree_ for Kagome to take the energy," Miroku concluded, raising a tentative eyebrow at Kaede.

Kaede nodded, and added, "With more training, she should be able to overcome this barrier."

Miroku exhaled. Without a doubt, Kagome was gifted with powers, only second to the legendary Midoraku. With practice, Kagome could be a great threat to Naraku. The downside would be that the two powers needed contact- and if Kagome went close enough to Naraku to _touch_ him, she would most certainly be dead.

"So what are your plans, Kagome?" Shippo piped up, sipping a can of coke.

Kagome accepted a bowl of soup from the elder miko and looked out of the window into the starless night.

"Yuuno and Tia would most likely take three days to recover, if I am not wrong," she said, finally. "I'll be home during that time, pereferably stocking up on food as well. After that, we'll set off. Immediately," she added, picking up her half empty bag. She looked troubled, as if uncertain of her choice. No one objected, and sang a chorus of "good-byes" as Kagome trudged out of the hut.

_I wonder if it'd be better if Koga were here_, Miroku thought, not realizing how prophetic the thought turned out to be.

* * *

_The well again. I had come out of the well and to Goshinboku… Where we met and parted in Kikyo's shadow. _

"_Had you not lived, I would not have died!"_ Kikyo had screamed to Inuyasha. The day Kikyo re-lived.

They had thought she was simply a soulless shell then, as Kikyo was revived. But a little of her soul stayed, not willing to be part of Kikyo, who wanted Inuyasha dead. Who would love him- separately from her, Hiragushi Kagome. She was never Kikyo, never only Kikyo. She was Kagome.

She saw everything that happened, Inuyasha's protests, Inuyasha's reluctance to hurt Kikyo, throwing away Tessaiga instead of killing her… And her knee-jerk reaction when Kikyo wanted to kill Inuyasha… was to protect him. And she did. Likewise, Inuyasha was there when she needed him…

But he did it because he saw Kikyo in her.

She was only Kikyo's replacement to him.

All that time. All that time…

It was just one sided.

"Sis!" came Souta's voice. "Mum! Gramps! Sis's back!" The voice seemed miles away, separate from her.

"Oh, Kagome! You're back! I was just wondering what ailment after your dental appointment for gingivitis! Upon seeing you, I got a brainwave! Depression! Depression can be quite serious, and I could say that you were off to counseling, or off to catch your breath the countryside…"

Kagome's face twitched at her grandfather's words. Depression? For a second, she thought he had seen through her tough front. Looking closer, however, she saw in the aged lines the same enthusiasm a child would have, rattling on and on about his new hobby. Kagome heaved a sigh of relief, but the weight on her heart stayed on, crushing her.

"Kagome dear, do you want us to stay?" her mother asked, tentatively.

"You- you're going somewhere?" It was only then she noticed three suitcases by her mother, and the fact that the three of them had donned jackets.

Grandpa sighed, and told her they were going to the hot springs for a week. Kagome listened with rapt attention, her mind twirling. Grandpa has seen a quiz on television on the Sengoku period, and had called in instantly. After the emcee shot over fifteen questions at him- which was "all chicken feed!"- he announced that he had earned himself two tickets to the hot springs. They had to buy Souta's, and had decided to leave while Kagome had gone.

"Kagome dear, if -"

"No mum. I have to catch up on school work. Anyhow, I can only stay for three days." _It would be good, Kagome thought. No one would be here. They won't have to see me-_

"Inuyasha onii-chan impatient, sis?" Souta asked, slyly.

_-despair_. She felt her head dip in a sharp nod, and heard Mum rush off to prepare dinner and a lunchbox for her lunch tomorrow. Time felt meaningless, as she pretended to listen attentively to the anecdotes Grandpa shared, about how Houjou had sent over a box of vitamins, while she was gone and how her friends called ever so often, never detecting the made-up stories.

Her face muscles arranged themselves into what could be a smile as she waved her family members away into the night.

Hojou. Her friends. All part of a life she had previously. She belonged in the Warring states, yet, she didn't. Fatigue of the whole situation crashed down on her, and she flung herself onto her bed, wanting to cry out the weight in her chest. But something was creating a barrier, stopping her from doing so.

_Otherwise, she will forget Inuyasha._

_

* * *

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**Ah, is this chapter okay? I dont think it is as good as the previous chapter, though i hope that it is going, gradually, smoother? Reviews please? Thanks a million for reading!**


	4. Link Despite Parted Ways

**Chapter Four: Link Despite Parted Ways  
**

**Disclaimer: We all know that Rumiko Takahashi is a genius for creating Inuyasha.****  
**

* * *

"Here's your room, miko-sama. Have a good rest," the village headman said, bowing himself out of the room, though not without narrowing his eyes at Inuyasha. The black haired hanyo glared back.

The reception had been horribly awkward. On one hand, a miko, and the fact that the mountains behind the village were full of youkai. On the other hand… a hanyo. Only after they demonstrated what a terrific exterminating team they made did some villagers agree to allow him in. Within a few seconds of fighting together, and they fell into a familiar pattern, guarding each other's backs. He knew that Kikyo did not want to be treated like a young kid, being always sheltered, and thus refrained from getting in her way.

What he could not stop himself from using was Tessaiga. Not like he could not fight with his bare claws, but it felt more normal. After he sleuthed his blade, he silently promised himself not to use it again- unless it was truly needed, for the blade made him remember Kagome. How many times had she needed his protection and he had rushed there in the nick of time, by instinct? By instinct, not to let her get hurt. By instinct, not to leave her. And yet, he had.

"Best dishes by my daughters. Please tuck in, miko-sama," the lady of the house said, setting the food at their feet. She stole a curious glance at him, before bowing to Kikyo and turning her back on them. _At least the woman is not as idiotic as the man. Or maybe she's a good actor_, Inuyasha thought as he moodily poked his chopsticks into a dumpling.

Although the villagers were grateful to them for annihilating the youkai, the headman, amongst other people, had objected to having him in the village. It was ridiculous, for they argued for so long that he had turned into a human. And with that, the villagers changed heart with the speed of an arrow. All but the headman. Majority won, mainly because Kikyo refused to stay if Inuyasha did not. He even had to thank that ruddy new moon now. Pathetic. He would rather have slept in the open. It was always like this, previously, because the deal came with a monk, a miko and an exterminator. Oh, and chuck in the two cute demons. Only the hanyo was the minus point.

How was Kagome doing? Miroku and Sango could protect themselves and each other, no problem, but how long more until they learn to add Kagome into the equation? Kagome had never been out of the danger zone _once_, during a battle. And it was not as if she could protect herself any more that minimally. Sure, she had powers, but she was generally using the time to worry and to follow the battle. And it's not like he was unhappy that she was getting out of direct harm. But how would she fare without him watching over her?

Subconciously, he wished Koga would join Kagome. He was the only one motivated enough to ensure her utmost safety. Despite hating the idea of that mangy wolf touching Kagome, it had to be done. With Koga around, even if Naraku sprung an attack on them, they should fare okay…

"You seem in deep thought, Inuyasha," Kikyo murmured, laying down her chopsticks.

"I- I was thinking about the shards, Kikyo." _That's not a total lie. Kagome holds the shards._

"An intriguing topic. What would you do with the jewel, Inuyasha?"

"I don't know… The main thing is killing Naraku, isn't it?" Inuyasha replied, wolfing down the contents of his bowl- Kikyo's was nearly empty by now! "Could we bring you back to life?"

Kikyo looked highly amused. "No more youkai ambitions?"

He shrugged. But how could he, when he knew that as a youkai, he'd be out of control? Every time without fail, Kagome would have to subdue him…

"I don't think the jewel can bring me back, Inuyasha. I am _already_ among the living. Even if it could, I wouldn't use it thus." Catching Inuyasha's startled look, she continued. "The jewel would have to be purified with Naraku, once and for all."

_That'd cause Kohaku to die_, thought Inuyasha. _And affect the lives of people like Koga… _The image of Kagome swam into his mind.

_Dammit. I must stop thinking about Kagome._

…_Kagome._

* * *

Kagome Hiragushi's eyes snapped open to the darkness of the room. Three a.m. What had woken her? It was as if someone had called her.

Now wide awake, Kagome decided that it was useless to try get to catching up on sleep. For the next hour, she pulled out all the notes Souta had photocopied for her. Surprisingly, she understood it with hardly any difficulty. At the last page, she found a sheet of paper covered in marker ink.

_Page 56 and 57, English Assignment book. Chapter 7, Math- complete all. Good luck, Kags. Science, read up intro' of Physics, part , questions 1 to 10: Reference, TB Chapter 'Feudal Era'. Kagome, you'd better get well soon, or you'd soon be drowned in a mountain of homework!_

_Feudal Era. I can never extract myself from it fully, can I?_

She sighed and focused on the homework. When the alarm clock jerked her to her senses and signaled the start of the weekdays, she was totally taken by surprise, for all her homework was done. Rushing to eat breakfast- yesterday's dinner- and shoving her lunchbox into her bag, she made it out of the house to catch her three friends, all positively delighted to see her.

"Up and about already, Kagome?" exclaimed Eri.

"Have you done your homework, Kagome? And revised for the test?" Ayumi asked.

"Must be bad for you, Kagome, getting gingivitis after the long hospital stay for meningitis… Hang on, what do you mean, a test?" Yuka demanded, hands on her hips.

"Wait, guys!" Kagome said, holding out her palm. "Firstly, I haven't got gingivitis. I, er, brushed onto my gum… false alarm. I've done the homework, but whaddya mean, a test?!"

The lively chitchat started up, and Kagome nodded and "hmm-ed" at pauses. It was quite tough to follow the unending stream of whats-going-on-in-school talk.

_I wonder how Yuuno and Tia are… How the gang is… How… Inuyasha is…_

"Kagome, are you alright?" asked Ayumi. Kagome jumped.

"Yea, Kagome," Yuka piped up. "You seem… out of it, today…"

"No, I-"

Eri rolled her eyes. "Spill it out, Kagome. It's that two-timing boyfriend of yours, isn't it?"

"Have you decided to dump him?" Yuka questioned.

Kagome's mind came to an abrupt halt, and, unknowingly, stopped in her steps as well.

"Kagome…?"

_Dumped. Yup, that's what she was. Inuyasha chose Kikyo over her. Inuyasha._

_Those amber eyes had never seen her, only the Kikyo in her._

'_I love Kikyo,' he had said._

"Kagome? Kagome? Don't scare us!"

"He… he's finally chosen. Not me, though." Her voice was monotonous, without emotion… There was no speech form to express sorrow, was there? Seeing her friends' looks on their faces, she hastily added, "Look, I don't want to talk about it, okay? It's over, period."

"But Kagome!" Eri protested.

"I don't want to talk about it, okay?" she said, her heart clenching painfully. She heard the hysteria in her voice, and steadied herself. "Let's… just get to school, alright?"

Nodding simultaneously, the three friends followed her, silence echoing in their wake.

* * *

"So, Inuyasha has decided to go to Kikyo," Naraku said softly, gazing at the mirror in Kanna's hands. To see them travel so much faster than before… no, it did not matter to him. They were just getting closer and closer to their doom.

A poison wasp buzzed quickly to Naraku, and his mouth turned up in a sneer.

"Kagome gained healing powers. Healing powers- just that?" he snorted. "Sure, that would be handy. Just about as useful as Sesshomaru's Tensaiga, don't you think, Kanna. She can heal everyone in the gang, and I will just inflict pain some more. Similarly, Sesshomaru can save as many people as he wants- I'll just kill them once more."

_But even so, I shouldn't put down my guard_, he thought. Kagome is a mystery, and her powers are worth watching your back for. Previously, all the people who were an immediate threat went solo. Now, Kikyo, with Inuyasha combined, would be a far more tricky opponent.

_Though leaving the persistant humans unguarded,_ he added. It was very likely, however, that Koga would join them. If so, he had lesser reason to worry, than if the group joined Sesshomaru.

"What will you do if those humans joined Sesshomaru, then?" asked Kagura, echoing his thoughts.

"_Very obviously_, Kagura, that will not happen. Sesshomaru would sooner eat them than adopt more humans. Humans whom he doesn't care about. Kind of makes you jealous of Rin, Kagura?"

Kagura fixed him with an icy glare, before claiming that she was above that.

"But the worry is reasonable, I have to say. In the next few days, Koga will get the motivation to join Kagome, before Sesshomaru could. In the meantime, Kagoura…" his now razor sharp voice made her look up, frowning. "You are dead meat the instant you leave the castl without my orders."

_Damn you, Naraku,_ Kagura cursed, seeing Naraku's eyes. _I will find my freedom one day, and it's the day you'll regret!_

* * *

_Finally free of pretending,_ Kagome thought, waving her three friends out of the house. The three of them had suddenly decided to revise for their Geography test- which was two days later- at her house. If she had not known better, she would have believed that they were worried about Kagome being alone. Of course, Hojou, as usual, detected nothing.

"I rushed to get you this once I heard the news, Kagome," he said, smiling. "Gum care products!"

"Hojou, I can't!" Kagome exclaimed. Not in pleasure- in shock! It looked like Hojou had got her one product per brand- of healthcare products! Despite her explanation of false alarm, he did not accept.

"It is never something too late to prevent!" he added, hopping onto his bike and cycling out of sight.

Not many missed the change like Hojou, however. She really had to count her blessings; numerous times, she slipped out of concentration. The classmates on her left and right always patiently prodded her, relaying the page the teacher was on, or the instructions that were given… The teachers, who always called on pupils who were obviously dozing off, losing concentration, reading manga under the table or using marker pens to "tattoo" their forearms, refrained from calling her to answer questions and deliberately turned a blind eye to her conduct. When their eyes met, she read understanding and concern, never probing. Some other girls in class even asked, "Kagome, are you okay?" before squeezing her shoulder in encouragement. None prodded on what the cause was- they knew that she would open up to them when she felt up to it.

"I become so numb I can't feel you there, become so tired so much more aware…" blasted from Kagome's MP3 speakers. Yuka had turned it on, in an attempt to drown the awkward silence after they had finished revising. Music seemed to go well with cookies- or not. That line from Numb, Linkin Park, really said it all, didn't it?

_They would just have to be disappointed, then._

She appreciated that, all that, but how could she open up to them? When she was trapped in her mind and by her heart?

Sighing, she went to clear her desk, and was just about to bring down the plates when she spotted a bright blue note. Apparently, Eri had unearthed the note from her primary school form teacher.

_Keep up the good work, Kagome! You have a good standard of everything, and I for one will await the day you shine! Continue smiling! =)_

_Smiling,_ Kagome thought, grimacing. Right, she could really smile now, when she felt as if she could never feel happy again. Her hand stuck the note into a page of a book- a very familiar one- before she recognized it. _Her diary._

Suddenly propelled by an overwhelming urge, Kagome held her pencil poised over the next blank page in the book. Her hand flew over the page, sketching, sketching… without knowing what she was drawing…

"Coz everytime we touch-" Kagome's other hand grabbed the MP3, skipped the song, and turned it off. Just then, she gazed onto the face of Inuyasha. Somehow, unknowingly, she had sketched a portrait of Inuyasha looking away coldly, and herself, back facing him, with a broken heart between them.

Her eyes ran over the paper, then the note, followed by staring at her MP3.

_I swear there's a conspiracy around here. _

_

* * *

_**Thank you for reading!!! How was it how was it how was it? I kinda feel like getting some humor in every one or two chapters... It feels more like irony here, though, yes? Please review, TYVM!!**


	5. Differences

**Disclaimer: I never did own Inuyasha.**

**To the people who were following this fanfic, a thousand apologies! _ This is really very bad behaviour on my part. I promise to do my best to finish Protected Pain without having such a long gap anymore. I'm truly sorry!  
Part of my reason is because one of my best friends told me that writing fanfic is disrespectful to the original author. So I got kinda depressed. Following that, I lost my thumbdrive (AHHH!) and couldn't find my original drafts- I'm sorry for the wait! (I know these sound like excuses- I'm so sorry!) Lots of time passed, then Remenyke asked me to read her fanfic, and I realised that I hadn't updated this for eons! For those who were following, my apologies again.**

**Differences.**

* * *

"Disgusted, Inuyasha?"

"No, Kikyo. I would never be disgusted by you."

A smile spread across the miko's face, and the soul collectors resumed dropping the dead souls into Kikyo's lap. Inuyasha looked away, sitting cross legged opposite Kikyo.

The two of them had left the village first thing that morning. It would have been a nice day- if the headman had not glared at Inuyasha in that way. To use simply the word "dislike" would be an understatement- it was of hate and loathing. The kind of glare you would give someone who annihilated your entire family. Worse still, the men flanking him shared similar expressions of distaste. It left no doubt whatsoever that it would not be the end of the matter. But what would a human do to a hanyo? Especially since New Moon had passed.

Later, they spied a determined-looking messenger exiting the village, apparently heading towards the next village. Due to safety purposes and some of Kikyo's needs, they hit the forest, bypassing the other village- just in case.

Talking about Kikyo, he started to wonder whether what Kikyo was doing was ethically wrong. While he travelled with Kagome, it felt wrong, unjust, to rob away the rest the dead souls could have otherwise. _Now, however…_

"Kikyo, can souls feel?"

The miko arched her eyebrows. Her chocolate brown eyes, the exact same shade as Kagome's, held amusement.

"No, they can't. And the souls I absorb… They will be released when I injure myself- or die."

"Then, why-?"

"My body cannot produce energy for me anymore, Inuyasha. In fact, food is no longer an essential part of sustaining myself. The souls are needed for this clay body to function, and provide energy for me to walk this land."

_-it does not seem to be hurting anybody._ He nodded offhandedly and tried to ignore her steady, inquiring gaze. He felt as though he was split into two- Kagome's Inuyasha and Kikyo's Inuyasha. The frustrating thing is that they are interconnected! With Kagome, he could not enjoy her company fully because he thinks a lot about Kikyo. With Kikyo, he cannot stop craving for the company of Kagome.

He liked travelling with Kikyo, however. His heart swelled as the full impact of his situation came to him: he was with Kikyo! Finally, after 50 years, they were together again. The first girl he loved. And with that, Inuyasha placed a lock over thoughts of Kagome. He was with Kikyo and nothing would change that. Nothing.

Within the span of three days, they had covered two times the distance they would have covered with the gang.

* * *

The ball slammed onto the floor beside Hiragushi. He cursed, as the whistle blew, signaling the end of the volleyball game. It was just his luck that the teachers decided to let the two classes play together. Each class would have players in both teams. On the bright side, he got Hojou, his best pal, with him. The downside, however, was Hiragushi Kagome. Every of his teammates-cum classmates glared at her. As team captain, he wanted to do something- about her.

"Last time Suki had to rush in front of you to return the ball," he snarled, stopping inches before her. "This time, you let the team score right next to you. You did not even _attempt_ to save it. What kinda attitude is this?"

"Sorry," she mumbled, not meeting his eyes. He hated it. Acting as if she was sorry did nothing to appease him. She looked around her, as if looking for help. Rage built up in him.

"Oh, you're sorry! What good will that do? What were you doing during the game? Posing? Dreaming? Are you autistic or are you just plain dumb?" he demanded, shoving her. To his utter surprise, she stumbled and fell to the ground, grazing her thigh. It was as if she had no backbone, or no support… no life force.

Instantly, Hojou was between them. "What's your problem, Kyle? It's not Kagome's fault!"

Kyle looked down on Kagome. Strange! The girl's hand moved to reveal only a raw patch of skin, not the grazed skin he thought he saw. Maybe he thought too much.

"Kyle, you may be my best pal, but I won't have you doing this!" Hojou said, hovering over Hiragushi. The girl lept to her feet and tried to pull Hojou away. He shook her off.

On impulse, he said, "What is she to you anyway, Hojou? Your wife?"

An ominous silence spread through the court. He had achieved what he wanted- he had Hojou at a loss of words. He turned his head to look at the girl- and regretted, instantly.

Hiragushi was walking calmly towards him, murderous rage etched in every muscle of her features. The weak girl façade was gone. For an instant, Kyle thought she was going to slap him, and energy seemed to seep away from him- the brave front that he had sustained was all gone now.

But she did not. She walked, calm as you please, to her bag. Three of her classmates flanked her sides as the bell signaled the end of the lesson, leaving a cemetery-like silence behind them.

* * *

Matsumoto sensei, History and form teacher of Kagome's class walked into the room. Setting down the stack of papers in her arms, she noted how Kagome seemed to react a second slower than the other students. Her eyes glazed over and with no expression. She seemed… Hollow, somehow, and yet, her grades were consistant.

"Class, for the last assignment, it was actually to see how you stand. If you had noticed, the assignment was set similarly to exam style. And I am pleased to announce that Kagome has scored to most marks! Remember, relevant extra details included in your answer lead to bonus marks! Kagome, would you kindly come and receive a little token."

Claps rang through the class as Kagome walked to the front and smiled weakly. Matsumoto sensei gave her a small bar of chocolate and whispered, "Kagome, could you meet me outside class after the lesson?"

Kagome stared at her for a split second before agreeing. For the rest of the lesson, Kagome took notes sullenly, as if waiting for time to pass. Finally, the bell rang.

"Yes, sensei?"

"Oh, nothing much," she said, waving an airy hand at Kagome. "Your handwriting has changed a lot though, actually. Kind of hard to read, hm?"

Kagome nodded. Matsumoto sensei suddenly felt small under Kagome's unwavering gaze.

"If you would excuse me, sensei-"

"If you have anything to tell me, anything- feel free to approach me… Kagome."

Their eyes met for a moment, before Kagome looked away.

"Nothing at all, sensei. Everything is fine."

* * *

"_There are shikon shards in the village, Inuyasha, and we cannot take a chance," Kikyo murmured, keeping her eyes fixed to the village._

_Inuyasha stared at her. "You do know it is odd, don't you? You can literally see a conspiracy forming!"_

Inuyasha's face twitched remembering that. Sure, it was a conspiracy all right. A conspiracy that Naraku conspired to make use of.

The welcome they received from this village was completely different from the previous one. Warm, welcoming... On the surface. There was a snapping tension in the air, a reason why Kikyo had refrained from asking about the shards.

"It's in safe hands- and close to us too," she said, with a twinkle in her eyes. A girl about six years old brought in dinner. Surprisingly, she had bow and arrows strapped onto her back. Just smelling the food make his stomach growl. "The food smells wonderful," Kikyo commented. "Did you prepare it yourself?"

"Yes, miko-sama! I am Akiko! It was so nice of you to eliminate the demons in the other village! Miko-sama, there are demons here too!" she gushed.

There was only one thing of importance, them- the connection between the previous village and this. Neither of them knew what there was one more point- demons.

And now they were facing the demons. Naraku's. And Kagura.

The jewel was clutched in Akiko's hand, clear and untainted, between them.

Inuyasha cursed, chiding himself for not seeing it sooner, allowing Kikyo and the girl into danger, allowing Kagura to take advantage of the situation.

It was originally very simple, actually. The messenger from the previous village had spun tales of untruth about him, and gathering the other villagers, they snuck up upon him in the middle of the night. Thus started a weary fight with humans- simple due to the fact that they were humans.

The fighting finally ceased when Akiko rushed in, tearing and breathless, eyes wide with horror.

"The demons have come," she gasped.

Instantly, he and Kikyo rushed out to meet the sight of total chaos. Demons were after the children and breaking houses to get to animals and food. Combining forces with Kikyo, they managed to eliminate most of them- until Kagura arrived. And it just made things better when Akiko happened to run pass them.

"Hand over the jewel and nobody gets hurt!" Kagura said coldly. "You know that it does not matter to me, one more life taken… or one less."

"It'd be on your conscience, Kagura, robbing away the freedom you crave from others."

"Hmph! That's only for humans and weaklings," Kagura scoffed. She apparently missed what Inuyasha saw, however. In that brief exchange, Akiko shot her hand into her pocket, then speedily retracted it, hand gripping something tightly. Kikyo stared intently at Akiko, registering information one step ahead of him.

"Hand over the shard!" Kagura shouted, spreading out her fan threateningly.

"Take it then!" Akiko shrieked, throwing the shard over. As a gush of wind consumed it, Kikyo- and, surprise surprise- Akiko drew their bows and fired, as Inuyasha sent claws of blood to Kagura. With a sharp command, the demons blocked Kagura as she mounted the feather.

For a second the demons concealed her, rendering her invisible to them. It was over.

_Or was it?_

"Duck!" Inuyasha shouted as his ears picked up the sound of the wind. In a reflex motion, he pulled KIkyo over his shoulder and jumped into the air…

… as the wind blades cut into the soil they were a second ago. It had missed them.

"Oh no, Akiko!" KIkyo whispered.

Inuyasha's heart clenched. _Oh damn._

Kikyo jumped off his back the second they touched ground. Akiko was covered in a pool of blood, and scarcely breathing. _No… This is my fault._

"Akiko! Akiko, please, don't-" Kikyo whispered, voice cracking.

"Miko… sama… Don't… it isn't your fault…" Akiko murmured, voice so weak it was fading away. "Miko-sama, the real shard… it's in my… pocket. My sister… was a miko too… you know? She forsaw… this. Don't weep," she insisted. "I… did not move myself… to join… my sister… once more."

She put the shard in Kikyo's palm. "Take care of it… miko-sama. You'll… you… you can do it."

With that, she gasped one last time- before she closed her eyes forever.

Kikyo shakily picked up the shard, purifying it. The base was smooth, rounded.

The villagers hurried around, mending their houses, neglecting the death of a little gil. Only the shard could represent what the two around Akiko felt.

The shard shaped like a tear.

* * *

**... How is it? I know many people out there don't like Kikyo, but I won't be portraying her in an evil light. Like what Inuyasha said in the final act, Kikyo isn't like she was before. She is to be pitied too. _  
Differences. The reason why I titled it thus was because... Well, there are many changes, no? Differences between then and now, differences between the two female lead characters... Please let me know what you think.**

**Anyhow, I have the draft for the next chapter already- I'll put it up asap. Sorry for the wait... ****Reviews, please? ^^**


	6. Finding Out

**Disclaimer: Inuyasha belongs to Rumiko Takahashi. Wait, no, Kagome. Or Kikyo?**

**Chapter 6: Finding Out**

**This is for taking so long to get chapter 5 up. I'm sorry, I'll hurry up and write the new chapters. Please stick by Protected Pain! Thank you... Oh yes, and I changed the rating from K+ to T. Just in case my idea for the chapter some time later is not for kids. ^^ I'll get the next chapter up asap. Enjoy!**

* * *

"The first time he met Watson, he figured out Watson served as a military doctor in Afghanistan just by shaking his hand… Kind of like this!"

Kagome's head jerked up as she felt her right hand being squeezed.

"You're an archer, aren't you?" Jimmy Kudo said, confidently.

Kagome gawked at him, heat rising to her face as her classmates surveyed her in astonishment.

"How- how'd you know?" Kagome stammered, aware of dozens of eyes fixed on her.

"Simple! 'coz you happen to be wearing the summer uniform, I could see that your arm muscles are quite developed. Sure, you could get it from other spots but the calluses and the way you professionally strapped the arrows to your back made it pretty obvious!" Kudo said, grinning in a self satisfied manner at someone who seemed to be his girlfriend. "How was that, Rachel?"

"Fine, fine, mister Jimmy Kudo, professional private detective," Rachel said, feigning offhandedness. "Now can we go? We are obstructing a lesson."

"Okay! And so, Holmes was-"

"Enough about Holmes and Conan Doyle already!" Rachel bellowed, as they disappeared from sight.

There was a brief pause, before Kagome's classmates surrounded her.

"Ooh, Kagome, you never told us that!"

"Professional, he said, Kagome!"

"When'd you learn archery, Kagome?"

"Yes, this is a question I'd like to hear," the instructor muttered. Seeing him, everyone dispersed.

"My family shrine, sensei," Kagome said, crossing her fingers behind her back.

"Right," the instructor said, looking unconvinced. "Since you are the only one with more than zero knowledge on archery, you can be my demonstrator." Gesturing her to pick up her bow, and pause upon drawing the bow.

"Now, look here. Your legs must be parted to have a firm grip on the ground. Hold the bow…" he said, droning on and on. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, she was allowed to fire the arrow.

_Time for practice_, Kagome thought despairingly. The bull's-eye was so tiny! Compared to demons where her arrow would disintegrate them no matter where she hit, she had never a standard practice. Her heart racing- what an odd feeling it seemed- she squinted into the distance and fired.

The class gave an exaggerated moan as Kagome briefly heaved a sigh of relief. Although she missed the bull's eye by centimeters, no trail of purifying power followed the arrow. Perhaps the power could be controlled after all.

"As your classmate just demonstrated, wind conditions would severely affect the path of your arrow. Make sure you check the weather conditions, is that clear? Now you can go onto the practice field, joining the B class. The other instructor and I will come around, pointing out your mistakes. You may go."

Sandwiched between Ayumi, Yuka and Eri, Kagome found herself marched away from the rest of her classmates. Finally, the last day of misery, she thought. Hiding something was never her niche. And yet… after practicing in front of the mirror for two hours, Kagome managed to keep up a satisfyingly realistic mask of attentiveness and normality. But she could not go further. Any attempt of acting cheerful around people caused her to become hysterical. Instead of having Inuyasha as the fuel for her life, now any thought of him landed her at rock bottom.

"Hi, Hojou!" her friends said in unison, startling Kagome. Her eyes opened wide and surveyed her surroundings. She saw Kyle in a headband, looking almost murderously at her- but no Hojou.

"You guys find it funny do you?" Kagome said, looking unamused. Her friends smiled cheekily at her. Picking up her water bottle, she took a gulp. She was secretly pleased that Hojou wasn't around. _Without him-_

"Hey Kagome! Fancy seeing you here!" Hojou said, seemingly appearing out of thin air.

-_I wouldn't have to pretend so much_, she thought, choking and gasping for air like a fish out of water. From the corner of her eye, she could almost read Kyle's mind: actor.

Despite the worst of fortune, practicing with Hojou was not too much of a nightmare. With some tips from Kagome, he managed to hit the targetboard and spent the rest of the time passing on tips to Eri, Ayumi and Yuka. Otherwise, entertaining himself by aiming to improve his results.

"Look, Kagome! Finally hit the bull's eye!" Hojou said excitedly. Just as she was about to reply, Hojou's face changed. "Look- look out!"

Kagome whipped around. As if in slow motion, the arrow closed the distance between itself and its target. With a sudden burst of rage, Kagome pivoted sideways and snagged the arrow, by then inches away from herself. "Oohs" and "ahhs" came from around her, but she was oblivious to the voices. Pulling the arrow on her bow with a swift motion, Kagome fired the arrow back at Kyle. The arrow barely missed Kyle's face, then embedded itself in a surrounding tree. For a second it seemed as if Kyle had noticed the faint pink glow radiating from the arrow- then the façade of having graciously lost replaced the shock.

Moments of silence reigned, before the instructor cleared his throat.

"Time to pack up, guys. Next session is two weeks later," he announced, scattering the crowd formed around the duo.

"I suppose I'll see you around, Hojou," Kagome muttered, as she disappeared into the crowd with her friends. She hurried off so quickly that she did not notice Kyle walk towards the tree and examine the remainder of the incident. The radius of 5 millimeters around the arrow was charred, and the whole tip of the arrow was embedded in the trunk.

"I'll get to the bottom of this," Kyle said to himself.

Meanwhile, Kagome looked fondly at the flourishing shrubs outside the classroom. Less than twenty-four hours ago, the greeneries on that patch of soil were all sickly looking, a 100 per cent change from yesterday. Everyone credited the improvement on the gardener, but Kagome knew better.

The previous day, somehow, somehow, the energy radiating from Kyle was absorbed by her as she passed him. _Perhaps emotions could affect my power,_ she thought, thinking of Lady Kaede's statement. "With practice, Kagome should be able to overcome this," she had said.

That day, it seemed almost as though Kyle had given her the power, with no strings attached. She didn't have to do a thing.

But the combined power made it almost impossible to think straight. It took all her control to keep from exploding at Kyle. It was close- with the increased energy, one wrong step. One wrong step and Kyle would never say another word again.

Thankfully, she controlled it. At the first possible chance, however, she ground her foot into the soil and released the pent up strength. There was nothing around to heal, anyway. Not since the graze on her thigh.

Kagome was surprised and pleased when she found out that the golden glow could actually be controlled. The pink trails of purifying energy too, come to think of it. The breeze blew gently across Kagome's face, as if promising her its return.

_Return._ Inuyasha._ Inuyasha_, she thought, as her heart compressed painfully_. Inuyasha_.

_I'll be returning to that time after school today._

_Perhaps I'll be off for a fortnight, in time for the next archery practice._

Rushing into class, she made it into her seat one minute before the teacher entered.

_Inuyasha._

_

* * *

_

His nose twitched, triggering a frown, as Naraku's stench reached his nose. Not only Naraku's- Inuyasha's as well. Sniffing the air with more vigour, Koga's face fell as the sweet scent of Kagome's was nowhere to be found. Neither could he detect the other of Kagome's companions. Only… a nice smell, tainted with that of soil… and death.

Koga looked around, surveying the debris around the human village. It was apparent that a battle waged there, and more demons died than villagers. Naraku's demons.

_Why did Naraku attack the dog turd in a human village? And_, he thought, rushing to the other side of the village_, who is he going with?_ There was no mistake. The scent was Inuyasha. Where was Kagome?

"Come on, you two," Koga commanded. "We're going to go after Inuyasha."

"Inuyasha, boss?" Ginta asked, sniffing around. "Not sis?"

Koga felt heat creeping on his cheeks. Ever since he had expressed his desire to have Kagome as his woman, those two never let go of it, calling Kagome that. To be frank, he did love Kagome- a lot. But what could he do when she loved Inuyasha so? Pretend, something he keeps up. Pretending and lying to himself that he would stand a chance.

_Those two always wonder why I keep up this speed_, he thought as he ran, ignoring complaints and focusing solely on Inuyasha's scent_. How could they understand that without it, he would brood over the impossible thought- that he stood a chance?_ He knew he didn't. It was one sided, and that was not about to change.

He needed to kill Naraku. With him gone, all the anguish would disappear. He, Koga, would be able to put down the unfair slaughtering of his pack and kind. He would be able to eliminate the danger to the rest of his kind. He, Koga, would be able to give Kagome a shot at happiness- with Inuyasha. What more could he give? Blessings? The words would refuse to get out of his mouth. Objects? He held nothing of significant value. His life? Sure, that's the easiest. His heart? Kagome had it already.

Eyes widening, he skidded to a stop, causing a cloud of dust to soar into the air.

He had caught up with Inuyasha.

* * *

Looking out of the corner of his eyes, Inuyasha saw Koga emerge from the tornado. The wolf demon scanned the area quickly, frowned, and surveyed the site once more. The question on Koga's mind was totally transparent: Where is Kagome?

Inuyasha heaved a tiny sigh of relief, despite having a stupid mutated bear as a "sparring" partner. Unexpectedly, the bear feigned one to his left, and then whipped around to claw at Kikyo. Jumping and reducing the distance between himself and Kikyo faster than he had done yet, he pulled Kikyo out of harm's way. She nodded, the go-ahead signal to start the plan. Inuyasha jumped, but before landing the attack, Koga's foot collided with the bear's head. The bear, being the stupid animal it was, diverted its attention to Koga.

Oh well. I've nothing to lose, he thought as he whipped out Tessaiga. With a single motion, the Wind Scar hit the bear as the pink purifying arrow hit its target. Not a second too soon, Koga jumped out of harm's way.

"Are you trying to kill me, dog turd?" Koga yelled, a bead of perspiration running down his cheek.

What Inuyasha missed was the murderous glare on Koga's deathly glare upon him as he and Kikyo exchanged a peck on the cheeks. He knew what was in store for him when Koga hissed, "Inuyasha, come 'ere for a moment."

"Where's Kagome?" Koga asked, in a tone of suppressed fury.

"Dunno," Inuyasha replied offhandedly. _Finally. Finally Kagome will be safe. I'll be able to sleep well now._

"What. Do. You. Mean. You. Don't. Know?" Koga demanded, looking half crazed.

"I ditched her. Why do I have to know where that pathetic human is?" Inuyasha retorted.

Wham.

Koga's fist collided against Inuyasha's cheek, the force of it landing Inuyasha on the ground. Blood trickled down to his chin, as the hanyo winced.

Koga looked as though he was about to hit him again, so it surprised Inuyasha when Koga turned his back on him, Ginta and Hakkaku flanking his sides.

_That's right, Koga. Protect her. And make sure she forgets me, he thought._

A drop of salt water mixed on the droplet of blood dripped onto the soil as Inuyasha picked himself up, saying goodbye to his love.

Ironically, through Koga.

__

__

_

* * *

_

Ah. _So Koga went to Kagome without intervention on Naraku's part,_

Kagura thought, looking at Kanna's mirror. Suddenly, pain. Absolute pain. Needles were weaving themselves in and out of her heart. Grounded and boiled, Kagura could not help but shriek and moan. Her head felt as if it was expanding. Pain. Kagura gasped for air as tears rolled down her cheeks. She cursed under her breath, before emitting another shriek. Weakness. Weakness. The pain attacked the core of her being, internally, not externally.

"It hurts, doesn't it?" Naraku sneered cruelly, as icy tendrils seemed to find themselves into her heart. "This is your punishment for not retrieving the shard."

"I- tried!" Kagura wheezed, as cold iron clamps dug into her wrists, retraining her from clutching her chest in pain.

"Tried?" Naraku's voice was skeptical and unforgiving. "You got me a shard of glass! Sure, you tried!"

Kagura's body spasmed with pain as her ruthless master directed his rage to her heat. At that moment, all ambitions of being one with the wind meant nothing to her. Why was she born to Naraku? Used as his pawn in his maniacal aim to own the Shikon Jewel.

She owned nothing. Even if she could control the wind, she got no attributes from it. She was Naraku's slave. Real wind would not be chained up as she was now. She was only thankful that her mind was hers. Kagura's. And no matter what Naraku could not invade that privacy.

Finally, she could breathe regularly again. Naraku left, releasing her from her chains after half an hour of torture. Kagura coughed, feeling sand in her throat. Energy seemed to sap from her. Allowing herself to succumb to pain, her legs gave out and darkness engulfed her.

* * *

**Ah, this is not a crossover. For non Detective Conan fans, Jimmy Kudo and Rachel are characters from Gosho Aoyama's Detective Conan. I won't be featuring the two of them again- just to make the first scene more impactful? More imaginable? Did it work?**

**Uh... Since Koga is going to join Kagome, do you think we should have Ginta and Hakkaku tag along? Making the gang 8 people? Please tell me what you think! ^^ Please review! Critique welcome. **


	7. Missing

**Disclaimer: I _so_ own Inuyasha! ^^ not.**

**Chapter 7: Missing**

**Sorry for the wait, and thanks so much for the reviews! ^^ Really happy to see them. I noticed that most of the people who had the story on alert earlier in 2009 haven't picked up Protected Pain again... I guess I deserve it though. Sorry all. And thank you for everyone else- for continuing to read it! =)  
Ah... Nobody commented on whether Ginta and Hakkaku should be temporarily kicked out of Protected Pain. I drafted this chapter while hoping for responses, so don't mind me when I don't mention them much here. I'll settle the wolfy business in the following chapter. I'll do my best to update soon! Enjoy. ^^**

* * *

Rin stopped short. Now she could see why Sesshomaru-sama paused in mid-step. And the reason behind their need to remain silent.

At the opposite bank, a hanyo sat against the rocks, facing the river, which resembled moving diamonds in the afternoon sun. The hanyo seemed as if he was begging for attention as he stroked the coal black hair of a miko. Not Kagome. Red clashed with red as the miko settled beside him, seemingly just done with her shower.

Rin frowned as she turned to Sesshomaru. At that angle, she didn't look a bit like ten years old.

"Sesshomaru-sama, why is Inuyasha happily being with another lady? Not with Kagome?"

_Happily_, Sesshomaru wondered as he looked down at Rin. _At the first glance, it does seem that way._

"No one can stop him from doing what he wants, Rin," Sesshomaru replied.

"Not even his brother, namely youruself, Sesshomaru-sama?" Rin pressed.

Sesshomaru froze. The silence was broken by a thud, Jaken, who was climbing the tree in front of Sesshomaru to look, fell off, landing in a heap at Sesshomaru's feet.

"You stupid girl! Our lord Sesshomaru has nothing to do with that flea-bitten half-breed!" he squawked. "Right, my lord?"

The green demon looked up devotedly to see the sole of Sesshomaru's boot coming down on his head.

"Idiot! I said, be quiet!" he hissed. "Rin, let's go!"

_But Inuyasha is putting a false front_, Sesshomaru thought, as he stomped away.

"Wait, Sesshomaru-sama!" Jaken pleaded, waddling forward.

Sesshomaru's face twitched.

_As I was thinking-_

The wooden staff collided painfully against the demon's small skull, rendering his unconscious. Rin picked him up similar to how she would a rag doll, and set him on Ah-Un.

_-it's not what it seems from the outside._

Sesshomaru threw one more glance towards the embankment, before walking away. Everything about Inuyasha suggested that he was happy, satisfied, and the soft, loving gaze with which he looked at the girl next to him was not untrue.

But it was as if… as if he had given up. As if he had lost a flame in him. As if… as if he had no longer any purpose for living.

Was this the effect of the girl, Kagome, leaving? Because Inuyasha was undeniably radiating… sorrow. Sesshomaru looked pityingly down at his half brother, the first time ever.

_What do I know about love anyway?_ He thought, coming out of his reverie. He gazed at the young girl at his feet.

"Let's go, Rin."

* * *

A gust of hot air blew across her face, causing her to scrounge up her nose. She hated this kind of wind, the sickly warm kind, with no sense of satisfaction gained from it, even in summer. Eri looked down at the watch strapped on her wrist. Crap. She was five minutes late. Eri knew she could not count on Kyle's watch to be slow. A year back, when he had bought her this watch, they had synchronized their time perfectly. And exactly one year back, Kyle had confessed to her, and she accepted. There was nothing better than knowing that your love was mutual.

Shivering as the air conditioning evaporated her beads of perspiration, Eri glanced around WacDonalds. In seconds, she spotted Kyle, waving enthusiastically.

Over a cup of coke, fries and a freshly made hamburger, they began to talk. When she paused to take a bite of burger, Kyle grabbed her hands. Heat that was not from the food rushed up her cheeks, as she averted her eyes.

"Eri, after knowing you for three years, to think that you had nothing bothering you would mean that I was blind. Spill it out, Eri."

Eri gazed at the raven black eyes that she had learnt to love. Hesitantly, she expressed her worry about Kagome. His invitation opened up the dam, and before long Eri had related everything to Kyle.

Kyle leaned back in his seat and gulped down some coke.

"Do you get the feeling that Hiragushi has been going somewhere secretly?" Kyle asked, slowly. "Is it possible that it is something… illegal?"

"Impossible!" Eri protested. "Why would Kagome's family lie for her, then?"

That made the two of them ponder in silence. After a minute, Kyle shrugged and grimaced.

"I can only think that you call up Hiragushi and ask."

"Oh, that's a good idea," Eri said, rolling her eyes, but fishing out her cell phone nevertheless. She punched in the keys, and pressed it to her ear.

Eri could literally feel herself turning into stone.

"What's wrong?" Kyle demanded, pulling the cell phone over. Then, he stared back at Eri, motionless.

The taped, monotonous voice of Kagome issued from the earpiece.

"Gramps, mum and Souta will be back from holidays in the three days. I am not going to school for the next few days. So please leave a message after the tone…"

* * *

Shippo leant his head on the sides of the well. Looking in, the dark nothingness within it was too hard to bear. Now he could fully appreciate how Inuyasha felt, waiting for Kagome. He was so sure Inuyasha loved Kagome- but actions proved it untrue, so it seemed.

He sighed once again as he pulled out the golden locket from his pocket. Opening it, he gazed at the pictures inside, the corners of his mouth twitching slightly. They both looked like fools, but then, foolishness seemed to suit them better than truths. They were much happier then. _Oh well,_ Shippo thought, looking up at the clouds_. It's now my duty to keep Kagome's smile existant, right?_

_What do I do with this locket?_ Shippo wondered as the cold bit of metal found its way into the darkness of his pocket. He had to give the locket to someone! Not Kagome, and certainly not Inuyasha… but who then?

Lying on the grass, Shippo's mind wandered back to the conversation in the morning. Sango and Miroku had began to speculate that Kagome was never returning. As if giving up, they went on Kirara to help neighbouring towns to exterminate demons. On one hand, the food or coins they collected for the service would be beneficial for their journey- on the other hand, what if Kagome returned to find them gone? Shippo shook his head. Adults are so hard to understand, sometimes.

"Moping around, Shippo?" called Miroku. Shippo turned to look at the pair, returning with a basket of fruits.

"Not moping, nope."

"Waiting for Kagome? Gosh, you resemble Inuyasha so much!" Miroku said, laughing. "Want a pear?"

The tantalizing smell wafted towards Shippo. Shaking his head, he said, "Leave it for the journey!"

"And when's that?" Miroku asked, sitting down with Sango opposite Shippo. Kirara mewed softly, trying to snatch the apple from Sango's fingers.

"I don't know," Shippo admitted. Pausing slightly, he exclaimed, "I can't wait to hear Kagome say 'I'm back!'"

"I'm back!"

"Yeah, like that!" Shippo responded.

There was a moment of silence as the trio looked at each other. Turning back, they cried, "Kagome!"

Shippo noted solemnly how Kagome's smiles looked like grimaces and her eyes looked like solid pebbles. As she raced alongside him to get to Yunno and Tia's place, coldness from pain radiated from her, rather than the joy that usually did. Something was missing, most definitely.

"Yep, Shippo," said Kagome. Shippo clamped his hands over his mouth. Crap_! Don't tell me I spoke it out loud!_ "Something's missing, all right. The germs! You two are officially cured!" Kagome concluded, giving them a pat on their backs. After confirming that they had no need to stay at the village, Kagome announced that they were setting off, to the surprise of the gang.

Shippo thought he understood, however. The village held too much a link to Inuyasha for Kagome to bear.

Perhaps what was missing… was Inuyasha after all.

* * *

Sango watched her friend's progress with a sigh. The girl in front of her had everything, everything. Speed, power, beauty. The kind of beauty you would not regret seeing as her arrow pierced your heart, sending you to the world beyond. The face was of cold beauty, as if surrounded by a layer of ice. The redeeming factor was, to a keen observer, the emotions boiling within were not snuffed out. Just… concealed. Of course, none could see it but the gang- all others were vanquished in the bright pink glow. Kagome's physical abilities were soon catching up with her own. It was apparent to any but the blind that the determination was the result of pain- a pain so great that it would kill her otherwise.

True, the mask held, and worked. It was no longer simply a shield, but a shell as communication reduced significantly between the gang. At night, she would wake in cold sweat. Turning away, glistening tear tracks would reflect the moonlight, yet, she never opened up. It was as if all faith had died.

It was worse during shard hunting. She fought to no end, Kagome did, sustaining bruises from falls, slashes from attacks, and once, a sprain of her ankle. Sango recalled with some satisfaction how Shippo detained the demon thereafter and Miroku gave it a final blow as she tended to Kagome. For a moment then, she had to watch the blood drain from Kagome's face, and feel the coldness of her skin. It was as if Kagome had no strength left to save herself. Thankfully, upon seeing the shard obtained, she ground her teeth and managed to heal herself.

Everyone heaved a sigh of relief; until she fainted.

The awakening they expected did not occur- the fever that they did _not_ anticipate, however, did. It was in such a state, therefore, that Koga found her.

With a powerful punch, Koga pinned the demon onto the ground, arousing cheers from the onlookers. Sango delivered the final blow, as the boomerang hit its target effortlessly. Kagome and Koga "hi-fived". Sango allowed herself a tiny smile. The pair were hiding their emotions- for fear of hurting the other.

When Koga snatched the cold towel and ran it over Kagome's forehead, his face turned from angry to soft and regretful. The only times the demon opened his mouth was to take a drought of water and to ask how long Kagome had been in that state. Otherwise, the restoration of Kagome's health seemed to take priority over others.

That night, Kagome talking in her sleep opened the topic- Inuyasha. For a moment, no one had dared to say anything- the wolf demon's face looked half-murderous. It was Shippo who spoke up.

"It appears that you have seen Inuyasha, Koga?"

A nod, as Koga looked ahead rigidly.

"He looks okay, then?"

"What right has he to be okay, leaving Kagome behind?" Koga spat. He wanted to say more, it seems- but the words died on his tongue. He swallowed, and returned mechanically to his task. Kagome had not awakened.

Shippo sighed also, and lay down on the floor beside Kagome.

"He's with Kikyo, then?"

An unhappy "hmph" concluded the conversation, leaving each of us to our own musings. Privately, I was pleased. With Koga around, Kagome would surely be out of harm. It had now been a week since her return, and with Koga around, smiles broke through the cloud of depression. Whether it was good that Kagome was leaning on Koga remains to be seen- but it served well for now.

* * *

The two of them had soon synchronized with each other so well that Sango had no worries for Kagome's safety. When Kagome was in danger, Koga would, like Inuyasha before him, pull her out of harm's way. Until she tried to experiment with her energy absorption ability- much to the alarm of everyone in the gang. Sometimes, she got it, and the demon would wobble from the sudden drain in energy. To release the extra energy, Kagome would fire an arrow to kill it.

But more often than not, the demon's energy wasn't drained. And once, a demon almost got her because of her proximity- and Koga finally put his foot down.

"This is too dangerous, Kagome!" Koga whined. "Please stop this!"

"Seconded," Sango, Miroku and Shippo said in unison. Sango was almost scared out of her skin when the demon was _that close_ to vanquishing Kagome.

"But I need to practice!"

"You can practice on me!" Koga insisted, grabbing her hands. "I am demon too. But please stop this! If anything were to happen to you, I'll- I'll-"

"You'll?" Ginta and Hakkaku said, slyly.

"I'll never forgive myself," Koga whispered, blushing deeply.

On impulse, Kagome hugged him. Koga blushed deeper. The rest of the gang averted their eyes.

"Thank you, Koga."

And so, every night before turning in, she would practice with Koga. When she touched him, Koga's heart would beat a little bit faster. Being with her every day… made him love her more than before. More than it was safe. But he couldn't help it. And under his constant stream of concern, Kagome seemed more relaxed. The icy walls were driven down, and the tension in the gang from Inuyasha's departure was lifted. But the sorrow never fully left her chocolate eyes.

Then, there was the matter of _transport_. With Koga's speed, it was almost impossible for average humans to keep up. Neither was it realistic for Koga to slow down for them- apart from the time the humans needed to rest. Which the other two wolf demons were pleased to share.

"… That's true," Miroku said, thoughtfully. It was almost taken for granted that Miroku would be riding Kirara along with Sango. However…

"Want me to carry you, Kagome?" Shippo offered, looking concerned.

"What's the big idea?" Koga said, slightly put off.

"It's fine, Shippo-chan. Koga can carry me," Kagome responded.

When he did carry Kagome, he realized what the gang's concern was. Inuyasha carried her thus as well. And every time he carried her on his back, Kagome seemed to brood about it. He toyed with the idea of carrying her bridal style… But no. That just wasn't feasible. And Kagome probably wouldn't like it.

* * *

**How was it how was it how was it? The Sango POV was kinda messy, I know, flitting between memory and reality.  
This chapter is devoted more to Kagome- the only reference to Inuyasha is through other's POV. Because as much as I'm okay with Kikyo being with Inuyasha, I find it harder to put them together than Kagome and Inuyasha. Maybe afterwards I'll fast forward abit to bring in our favourite hanyo into our story again. Meanwhile, and mean-then, please don't get upset with the KogaKagome part. Koga does love Kagome. I think we do need to acknowledge that.**

**Once again, please review! Critique welcome. **


	8. Housekeeping and Valentine's

**Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha. I only own the things in my room. =(**

**Chapter 8: Housekeeping and Valentine's**

**Hi all! Thank you for reading Protected Pain! I hope I didn't take too long to get this chapter up- usually I finish two chapters before uploading the next one (i.e. finish both chapters 7 and 8 before posting 7), but this time I've only finished a single paragraph in chapter 9. But here's chapter 8. I'll hurry up and do chapter 9... but I'm having a mental block on it, as well as headache.  
Sorry for the wait and a very big thank you for the reviews! ^^ **

* * *

"So you are saying that this well leads to Kagome's house?" Koga asked, bewildered. Kagome had promised to be back in a week, then jumped into the dry well. He couldn't catch her in time- she certainly would have injured herself jumping from this height- but when he looked down, Kagome had disappeared.

"To be precise, to Kagome's time," the exterminator replied, as Shippo nodded.

"We've all tried to get through the well, but it only admits Inuyasha and Kagome-sama."

Koga's ears twitched in annoyance as he heard the mutt's name. Without another word, he jumped into the well.

"Aw, damn it," came Koga's voice echoing up the well. The gang looked at each other and shrugged.

* * *

"I'm home," Kagome said. For a moment, she was stunned. It appeared as though she had stumbled into a room of utter chaos- her mother and grandfather's tones of anxiety and worry, her brother's groans of pain. She took one moment to collect herself, and ran to the source of the noise.

Souta was in a heap under the staircase, face drained of colour, a lump forming on his forehead and ankle twisted in an unnatural manner. He groaned in pain.

"Call an ambulance! An ambulance!" yelled her grandpa, almost hysterical.

As her mother ran to do so, Kagome said, "Wait!"

"Wait? Souta's condition is serious!"

Kagome knelt by Souta, who looked like he was going to faint. "I'll heal him."

"Kagome?"

She put her hand gently on her brother's shoulder, accessing his condition. It _was_ quite bad, but she had the confidence to heal them. With three other energy sources, it was no problem.

The golden glow first numbed Souta's pain. "Don't move yet," Kagome warned. She proceeded to mend the blood vessels on Souta's forehead, then worked on his back. It was a serious injury- the drain in her energy was significant.

"Souta, hold out your hand," Kagome whispered. She tapped on his energy- giving a gasp, Souta pulled his hand back. "Relax," Kagome insisted, and drew a quarter of Souta's strength. Still, it wasn't enough to heal his back completely.

Using both her mother and grandfather's energy- not all, of course- she managed to heal Souta's back and ankle. The golden glow wavered, and Kagome removed her palm from Souta.

"All is healed but the non-life-threatening bruises on your arms and legs," Kagome said. "How do you feel now?"

Souta stood up and stretched himself. "It's just a dull ache everywhere."

Kagome nodded. "That's only to be expected. Though perhaps you should go for a check-up in case I missed out anything." She yawned. "I'm going to replenish my strength."

"Nee-chan's amazing," Souta said. The two adults, at a loss of words, nodded mutely.

* * *

Koga sighed as he heard the protestations that Ginta and Hakkaku made. He knew they would react negatively about this; the two had followed him since they were young wolves, even before he was made chief. They were the only surviving members after Kagura's slaughter. They shared an aim- to defeat Naraku. They were his closest mates. But still… no.

"Stop whining, you two!" Koga snapped. Ginta and Hakkaku looked hurt. Koga sighed. He really didn't want to do this, but it was necessary. "Guys, I know you are very loyal to me. You're my best buddies. But as of now, I need the two of you to leave me. Listen," Koga said, as they started to protest. "With the two of you around, I cannot properly take care of Kagome. All three of you are liabilities- if Kagome gets hurt, you know how much it'll hurt me in turn. If you two are in danger, I'll need to ensure your safety as well. You see how much that will restrict me? All Naraku needs to do is to keep targeting the two of you and Kagome and I'll never have time to attack him. Surely you want me to avenge our brothers' deaths!"

Koga glared at them, daring them to say the contrary. At the moment, he had Ginta and Hakkaku at a loss of words; that was good.

"Then where do we go?" Ginta whined.

Koga had thought it through, so it wasn't hard for him to answer.

"Go to the northern clan- Ayame's grandfather. While you are there, help to protect their can, and make sure you brush up your skills. When you are confident to fight alongside me, join me again."

"But won't Ayame kill you if she knew you were with sis?" Hakkaku asked.

"Well, just say that you two are too much a burden to me while seeking Naraku."

_Stab!_ thought Ginta and Hakkaku.

"But if she plans to join me, dissuade her at all costs!" Koga said, shuddering.

By evening, the duo were ready to go.

"I suppose this is goodbye, Boss."

"Just for a while, while the two of you improve yourselves."

"Boss, take care! And to sis too…"

"Yes. Don't the two of you dare die! Return as my worthy companions."

"Farewell, boss!" "We'll miss you!"

Koga waved. Before long, the two wolves were just brown dots in the distance.

"Was there really a need to send them away, Koga?" Miroku said, coming around. Koga said nothing.

"You just want to make sure they don't die because of you, right?" Shippo asked.

"In a way," he replied. "I want to kill Naraku as soon as possible."

_For so many reasons,_ he thought as the image of Kagome loomed into his mind.

* * *

"Kagome!" called Yuka, as the three of them caught up with Kagome.

"Are you okay now, Kagome?" Ayumi asked. "Your grandpa said that you had slipped in the bath!"

_Slipped in the bath? Makes Souta's almost a coincidence._ "I'm fine now."

As they walked to class, Kagome thought about Souta. He had slipped down the stairs after coming out of the shower. But after Kagome worked her "magic" on him, he was completely healed. Kagome didn't want to think about how it'd be if she wasn't around, or worse, if it had been jii-chan who fell. After she healed Souta, jii-chan had searched the shrine from top to bottom for records of such power. He didn't find any, much to Kagome's disappointment.

"This gift must be really rare!" he exclaimed. Of course, that was the bright side. Privately, Kagome wished there to be records. If there were, she would have an inkling of how far her power could be pushed. Her own strength had not been sufficient to heal Souta. And yet… when they fight Naraku, there would probably be more casualties. Her strength… was not enough. But how to hone it? She didn't know. Kaede-sama, who seemed to know everything, couldn't say either.

"What about you, Kagome?" Yuka asked.

"Huh?"

"We're going to Ayumi's later- to make chocolate for Valentine's tomorrow!" Eri said.

"Oh!" _Valentine's day… Originally, I was looking forward to making chocolate for Inuyasha. But now…_ "Yeah, sure." Her heart felt really heavy. _Inuyasha…_ She sighed. _And I really anticipated this._

"Eri, you are giving yours to Kyle, right?" Yuka asked.

"Wh-what? You are going out with Kyle, Eri-chan?" Kagome spluttered. Kyle? That annoying friend of Hojou's? "Since when?"

"Some time ago," she replied vaguely. "What about you three?"

Yuka refused to say. Ayumi wanted to give it to the entire class. Kagome... "To my family, I guess." _And the gang._

_Inuyasha…!_

The three of them looked at each other worriedly. Love should be a touchy subject right now for Kagome. Since her two-timing boyfriend dumped her, Kagome's face was that of an icy mask. As the day drew to a close and they found themselves in Ayumi's kitchen, the ice surrounding the mask grew thicker and thicker.

* * *

"Return home safely!"

Kagome and Souta waved to their mother and headed for school. When Kagome returned from Ayumi's yesterday, Souta was impressed with the chocolate that Kagome had made. Kagome laughed dryly and said, "Let's see how much chocolate you get tomorrow," making him blush. She had made one each for her family members, and everyone in the gang. Koga, Ginta and Hakkaku were included.

School was exploding with giggles, gossiping and wolf-whistling. Kagome had to fight her way through girls who blushingly presented their chocolate to guys they liked and guys who teased their buddies upon seeing chocolates under their desks. She passed by B class and saw Hojou looking slightly let down, rummaging through the chocolate under his desk. Kagome felt a small sense of guilt, and hoped that Hojou was not looking for chocolates from _her_.

Classes passed in relative chaos, for everyone was fidgety and restless. Well, almost everyone. While the people in class were gossiping together or sneaking a bite of chocolate, Kagome diligently took down notes of the lesson and listened to class. Without Inuyasha, Valentine's day held no attraction to her.

When the bell finally rang, Kagome was proceeding to do her math assignment. Yuka pulled her pen out of her hand and pushed Kagome to join the other two.

Eri was talking merrily about Kyle's reaction to her chocolate. Suddenly, she asked, "Do you hate him, Kagome?"

"Hate him? No," she replied. _But I don't like him_. She remembered how Kyle had fired an arrow at her the previous archery lesson. Was he testing her? Anyhow, Kagome didn't like him.

"I should introduce the three of you to him one day," Eri murmured. "He's really quite nice. Just don't think of stealing him."

_No way that'd happen,_ Kagome thought as a silver haired hanyo appeared in her mind.

* * *

Kagome ran towards the range. She was late- Matsumoto-sensei had called her back on some housekeeping matters. Kagome had gestured for the other three to go ahead without her. She bowed to the instructor and ran to join Ayumi and the others. Everyone was even more hyped up than before, something Kagome had thought impossible, and many were gathered in two main groups some distance away.

"What are we supposed to do?"

"Just practice shooting. 25 metre mark first."

Kagome nodded and picked up a bow. Apart from trying her energy absorption ability, she had tried also in firing specific targets on the demons. That spot on the belly. This part of the neck. There, between its eyes. But it was a moving target- although the demons were vanquished anyway, it was not exactly an effective training.

Kagome drew her bow, and fired.

Hit, right in the centre.

She fired again.

Bullseye.

And again.

_Yes!_

After another seven successive hits, the instructor pointed her to the 50 metre targets. The class stared in awe, and Hojou desperately tried to be "promoted" too. Kagome narrowed her eyes and released the arrow. It hit the targetboard, but missed the centre.

She worked hard at it for another half an hour. In that span of time, a few others had joined her in the 50 metre range. Hojou waved at her and fired intently. Somehow, the two classes of students were less noisy and more focused than before. Kagome looked around to see Kyle practicing beside Eri and the others. She shrugged, and continued aiming.

At long last, five successive hits right on target.

The girls erupted in squeals and the guys looked on with interest while Yuka and the others pulled her over to another targetboard. Only, this targetboard was full of blue hearts. Now that she noticed, there was another targetboard of pink hearts. She estimated the distance to be 20 metres.

"Wh-what's the big idea?"

"Aim at one of the hearts, Kagome!" Ayumi squealed.

Kagome looked at the hearts. They were all identical in shape, but were of different shades. Also, there was some writing on the side of each heart. From this distance, she couldn't read them.

"Which should I aim for?"

"How 'bout the navy blue on e at the top?" Eri suggested. Kagome looked at it and nodded absently. She didn't get what was going on, but she'd demand a thorough explanation later.

She fired… and hit. Right in the centre.

Instantly, a big group surrounded the targetboard.

"It's Hojou!"

_Hojou? What?_ Kagome turned around.

Upon hearing his name, Hojou was stunned for an instant. Then, he broke into smiles and walked over to Kagome.

"Hiragushi, thank you!" he said, reddening slightly. "I'll make sure I'm a great friend to you! I'll share your burdens when you are troubled,, and I'll be there when ever you need me! Just call, okay?"

"Uh, right," Kagome replied, as Hojou happily walked off.

_What… happened?_

* * *

The instructor had told them it was a treat for Valentine's day. If you did well in the 25 metre range, you would be allowed to do the ones in the 50 metre range. And, if you hit the bullseye five times there, you could have a go on the special targetboards.

There were two targetboards, one for the girls, one for the guys. On each heart would be the name of a girl or guy respectively.

"So you people can shoot the 'heart' of the person you like most amongst these two classes," the instructor said. "Guys to aim on the targetboard with the girls' names on it, please. Vice versa."

Everyone had been excited to try the targetboard_. Wonder which is Kagome's_, Hojou thought. He found Kagome's name in a rose pink heart, right at the center of the board. Using that as his motivation, Hojou practiced hard.

_Hiragushi's amazing,_ he thought, as Kagome moved onto the 50 metre range. His face tingled.

_I… want to join her there._

When he finally achieved it, there were other people beside Kagome, making conversation hard. Hojou smiled at her, then continued firing.

There were squeals, and Hojou turned to see Kagome marched off to the targetboard.

Kagome released the arrow and it hit a heart squarely. One of the girls who went to check shouted, "It's Hojou!"

His heart leapt.

_Hiragushi's favourite guy… is me?_ He felt a burst of happiness and a smile came onto his face.

Walking over to Kagome, he noticed how delightful Kagome looked. He gained a sense of satisfaction just seeing her. But… She was a little thinner. Perhaps it was just the hospital's food.

"Hiragushi, thank you!" he said, as his heart pounded. "I'll make sure I'm a good friend to you! I'll share your burdens when you are troubled, and I'll be there whenever you need me! Just call, okay?"

"Uh, right," Kagome had replied. Perhaps she was just shy.

He turned and walked away, feeling really happy.

_This is better than getting any chocolate!_ he thought.

* * *

**The last two POVs I think could have been done better. But well.  
I've changed the summary slightly, and hope that it gives the readers a better idea of what to expect. And as Protected Pain unfolds itself, I hope you all won't be too disappointed with how the story goes. Of course, feedback and critique welcome. ^^**

**Um, replying Inufan's review, I actually meant that our favourite hanyo would be returning into the spotlight of the story soon. Not really that Kagome and Inuyasha will be together like they were before. That would be in the final chapter of Protected Pain, I think.**

**Meanwhile, please bear with me, and do hit the review button. Many thanks. ^^**


	9. Anything for you

**Disclaimer: The contents quoted belong to their respective mangakas.**

**As I wrote at the beginning of this story, the sequence of events in this fanfic is different from Rumiko Takahashi's Inuyasha. I'll be twisting events to suit the plot. Please give me feedback on whether you like it.  
"Each interpretation of an event, setting or character is unique to the person who reads it because they clothe the author's description with the memory of their own experiences. Every character they read is actually a complex amalgam of people they just met, read or seen before- far more than it can ever be just from the text on the page"- so for the readers who have added Protected Pain to your story alert, thank you very much. Oh, and InuKag's reunion scene is delayed. It'll probably be in the next chapter, though.**

**Chapter 9: Anything for you.**

* * *

"See you in school, Hiragushi!" Hojou said, smiling cheerily as he waved. Kagome returned the wave half heartedly, then rounded on the others.

"You knew that that heart was Hojou's, didn't you?" Kagome asked Eri unhappily. This was the third day after that archery session, and Hojou wasn't yet toning down. Every break time he hung around with them- consequently, Kagome was to put up with the probing face of Kyle's. Though that may be welcome to Eri, Kagome didn't feel the prejudice against Kyle evaporating.

"But what's wrong with that?" Eri responded. "It's not like you have any other guys you like, do you?"

Kagome sighed. Had she known earlier, she would have picked another spot to aim at. Hojou, upon hearing that Kagome had trouble with her sciences, had offered to tutor her after school. At _her_ house. And every time he came, he brought gifts.

"What if he gets the wrong idea?"

"Chill, Kagome," Yuka said. "Remember, he said he wanted to be a good friend to you. He didn't say 'boyfriend'."

Kagome shuddered internally. Had he said "boyfriend", she'd have escaped through the well, science tuition or not.

"Yeah, and I guess I have to be appreciative that my house is being overstuffed with gifts, then," Kagome muttered, gesturing at the table as she led her three friends out. It was overflowing with fruits and medicinal herbs. The three of them smiled and went away.

Oh well. Just two more days. Two moe days before I return to the well, Kagome thought, as he continued reading her textbooks. Her eyes could not seem to absorb the contents of the book, and after awhile gave it up as futile.

"Have a break, nee-chan," Souta said from her bed. "You've been studying non-stop for the past five days."

"Perhaps you are right," Kagome allowed, as she joined her brother on the bed. Souta was reading manga intently.

_Fruits basket. Seems harmless enough._ "Can I read too?"

"Sure. But treat it well- I borrowed it from…" Souta flushed slightly. "… a friend."

Pretending to have missed his reaction, Kagome nodded, and started reading. Fruits basket was an interesting read- the emotions in it were so real and nicely portrayed. Kagome cried several times throughout the reading. Some lines jumped out particularly at her.

'For there to be pain, there has to be kindness. For darkness to stand out, there has to be the sun.'

Inuyasha, her sun, the source of so much of her happiness had left her. The legacy of his care for her, now that he had gone… was just pain… and darkness.

'Mingling with people, hurting them, getting hurt by them. That's how you learn about people and about yourself. If you don't, you'll never care about anyone but yourself.'

_But why must this lesson… be so hard?_

'Maybe I'm not perfect. Maybe I have a long way to go. But someday… Someday I'll be able to stand and walk on my own. Without hurting anyone… and without being a burden.'

_Sango-chan. Mirku-sama. Koga. I'm sorry… bear with me a while longer. Until we defeat Naraku._

'Just as no matter how hard you try to keep it away, despair will attack you again and again.' _Like now. The pain… doesn't disperse._ 'In the same manner hope will return to you. Again and again.' _… that… I find hard to believe._

'Someday… no matter how cold it is now… the snow will melt. Without fail.'

_When… will that day come? Will I be happy… if it does?_

'But I think… I want to live with all my memories. Even if they're bad memories. Even if they're memories that only hurt me… that I'd rather forget. If I keep them and keep trying without running away, then maybe someday I'll be strong enough that these memories can't defeat me. I believe that because I want to think that there's no such thing as a memory that is okay to forget.'

_Yes- I must not think of the times we shared together… but I must remember them._

_Inuyasha!_

_But when this pain doesn't hurt so much anymore, is it because I've grown stronger… or because I don't care?_

_If it is the latter…_

_I'd take the pain._

* * *

The bare trees swayed in the wake of Naraku's miasma. Inuyasha stared around in alarm, half afraid to believe that Naraku had run away. He sniffed the air desperately, but couldn't sense Naraku at all. Had he fled? Damn. It had something to do with the blue orb that the bastard was holding. It was as if he were a mere ghost- no youki, no shouki. And although he had no experience with ghosts, he was certain they wouldn't bleed. Or wince as a purifying arrow blasted away its arm.

"Come out, Naraku!" Inuyasha bellowed. "Fight me like a man!"

"Kukuku. And what gives you the idea that I fight honourable battles, Inuyasha?" came Naraku's echo, from all around them. Inuyasha sent a Wind Scar randomly, not expecting to hit.

"Let's go, Inuyasha," Kikyo said. Her countenance was of utmost composure, though she was really anything but tranquil. A slight tremble was the only clue that she was highly discomposed. Inuyasha made a slight noise of agreement, and stealthing Tessaiga, he turned to Kikyo.

Kikyo fell through the miasma and down the cliff.

Inuyasha watched in horror as Kikyo's shoulder was almost severed by Naraku's regrown limb as she fell. Her wound emitted the miasma from his tentacles.

"Kikyo!" he choked, as he plunged forward to catch her. He was not a second too soon from preventing her from crashing against the sharp rocks, or falling into the polluted stream.

"Take me away… Inuyasha," Kikyo said, as dead souls rose from her wound into the now clear sky. Naraku had achieved his purpose.

Inuyasha nodded and bit his lip as he carried Kikyo away. He tasted blood.

Why didn't he take better care of Kikyo? Why was he so incompetent? If Kikyo died, what excuse did he have for living? She had died because he couldn't save her from Naraku before. Now, it's happening again.

The same wound…

This time, if Kikyo died, he'd follow her.

* * *

Kagome looked around her. She could almost swear that she had fallen asleep in her bed, but this was nothing like a dream. The wind that blew into her face gently was too warm to be the air conditioning she happened to turn on tonight. She could hear the cicadas and the birds clearly, and the skies above were so full of stars- something she thought only appeared in the feudal era. Was this a dream, then, with her beyond the well? But it felt… too real. And… she'd never seen this place before.

Voices brought her mind focused on the scene in front of her.

Distracted as she was on her wonderings, she had totally missed the couple in the clearing in front of her.

Inuyasha… and Kikyo.

Caught by surprise, she emitted a little squeal, as her heart pounded painfully. Her legs felt like running away, before Inuyasha could see her.

But his head didn't turn a fraction of an inch, nor did his ears twitch. Kagome paused, and tried to touch the tree beside her.

_Her hand went right through the trunk._

Was this a dream? Or had she turned into some sort of shadow? What was going on?

"Is there no cure for you, Kikyo?" came Inuyasha's whisper. Cautiously, Kagome took some steps forward to take a closer look, then gasped in shock. Kikyo's shoulder was almost severed by a huge injury, which Kagome now noticed was the source of the miasma. It wasn't bleeding, but the wound from the miasma was inching towards Kikyo's heart.

"This wound has to be purified," Kikyo replied. "And even then, I may not recover." She grimaced in pain.

"Maybe we should seek the help of mikos from the nearby villages?"

Kikyo shook her head sadly. "Naraku's miasma is really strong. Not everyone has the power to purify it. Not effectively, at least. Only someone equal to me… about my standard. I'm thinking of using Midoraku's soul… but I can't last so long."

Kagome saw Inuyasha's face spasm in pain. He loved Kikyo, still. If Kikyo died, Inuyasha may return to her as Kikyo's replacement. But… that would mean making Inuyasha suffer the same hurt _she_ felt when he rejected her. Or worse. She wouldn't have that.

She tried to place her palm on Kikyo and purify the wound, but it didn't work. _What was to be done?_

Kagome knelt down beside Inuyasha and tried to grasp his hand by impulse. _How do I help Kikyo?_

Suddenly, there was a curious sensation. As if her hand had sunk into Inuyasha's, but it did not fall all the way through like the tree trunk. It was now or never.

Kagome reached her hand towards Kikyo's wound- Inuyasha's moved simultaneously. She saw his amber eyes blink in surprise, and felt him trying to pull away. She resisted, and focused her mind on purifying the miasma. Pink light burst forth from her palm- consequently, Inuyasha's.

While she did so, Kagome saw in her mind flashbacks of Kikyo's- or Inuyasha's- past. The time they had spent together, fifty years ago. As she was forced to watch, tears came to her eyes as Inuyasha's words rang in her ears again- that she was a replacement, nothing more. It was apparent that he loved Kikyo.

The pink light flickered with her change of mood, but Kagome held it steady against Kikyo's shoulder. Since Inuyasha had chosen Kikyo, she needed to wish him well. Happiness. She loved him enough to want that. But she… would forever love him.

In a few moments, the miasma had gone, but the injury left from Naraku's attack remained. Kagome shut her eyes and let golden light burst forth, healing and sealing the injury. Kikyo and Inuyasha's eyes were as wide as golf balls as they watched it unfold before their eyes- Kikyo's shoulder mending, and all that miasma disappeared.

At long last, the final crack was sealed. Kagome felt a real drain in energy, and wondered again what sort of dream this was. She pulled her hand from Inuyasha's- the surprise and joy at seeing Kikyo healed caused Kagome to feel icy stabs and some pleasure at the same time. Her heart ached.

"Riiiingggg! Riing-riing!"

Kagome bolted upright at the sudden sound, and found herself in the darkness of her room again. _So it was a dream? But… the energy drain seemed real enough…_ She sneezed from the cold air conditioning, and groped around for her phone.

Incoming call: Hojou.

"Hojou-kun?"

"Hiragushi! I've finally solved the assignment question you asked me about!"

"Hojou-kun, you stayed up to one to solve it?"

"Yep! Anything for you. So now, all you need to know about this question is…"

* * *

It was dusk when Koga caught the scent of Kagome, and raced with Shippo to the dry well. (the victor is obvious)

Koga couldn't help but stare into her face eagerly, as he helped her out. The sky was a beautiful painting of red, orange and yellow; the sun's rays gave an attractive glow to Kagome's face. As she thanked him with a small smile, Kagome remarked that the sunset was remarkably pretty today.

The words "it pales in comparison to you" tumbled out of his mouth before he knew it. He blushed slightly. Kagome stared into his blue eyes, trying to read something from his countenance. What conclusion she made he had no clue, but with her eyes downcast, Kagome replied, "Thank you."

The little fox kept staring at them in a way that Koga didn't like, but he couldn't help but feel a twinge of jealousy as Kagome hugged Shippo. He cursed himself internally for the slip. It obviously did nothing but to make Kagome unsettled, and throw _his_ mind into chaos.

Kagome's explanation of "Valentine's day" and the significance of "chocolate" was cautiously given. Koga wondered if it was because of his slip just now. Damn.

Handing out the chocolate, Kagome asked, "Where-?"

"If you are asking about Ginta and Hakkaku, I sent them to improve themselves."

Kagome's eyebrows rose, then nodded. She handed the old miko Kaede a piece and ate one herself, looking very thoughtful.

"Kaede-sama," she said. Then, she paused.

"Yes, child?"

"Oh, it's nothing," Kagome said. "Um… We should be leaving tomorrow."

"I see," the elder miko replied. She got up to pick up a set of miko clothing, and passed it to Kagome. "I've a feeling you'll need this one day," she explained, seeing Kagome's troubled face.

"Thank you."

Throughout the rest of the evening, Kagome was distant with everybody, seemingly caught up in her thoughts. Koga wondered if he was the cause of it, and berated himself.

"Kagome," Koga whispered, as he came up to Kagome from behind. Kagome jumped, then, recovering herself, smiled at him, and asked, "Yes, Koga?"

"Um… What I want to say is… I… I just want to take care of you, Kagome," he said, looking away. "I won't force you to love me, or anything. Just… let me take care of you." _Damn. This came out like total shit,_ Koga thought. _Screwed…_

Kagome smiled at him sincerely, and held his hand. "I appreciate it, Koga."

"Anything for you… Kagome," he said, flushing.

* * *

**Oh, and there's this story that I feel is really nice- .net/s/6414573/1/ Twitterpated, by InuXKags. I'd like to recommend it, if that's allowed...  
****And also, Heart of the Sea by Eoywn Organa (.net/s/3938799/1/Heart_of_the_Sea) In fact, about everything by Eoywn Organa is really good.  
... And lastly, a fervent bid for reviews. Thank you. ^^**


	10. Irrevocable Bonds

**Disclaimer: Yes, Rumiko Takahashi owns Inuyasha.**

**I changed the summary again. But I realised that I am probably really bad at this- I am at chapter 10 already and yet, the "protected pain" part has yet to be seen. And Inuyasha hasn't returned to Kagome. But I promise that Inuyasha will rejoin the gang by the following chapter.**

**Uh. I guess my story is quite bad, since the reviews are few (but thank you, for all who reviewed before) and everything. I shall just do my best and finish what I planned to do, without dragging the story longer than required. For those who have favourite-ed Protected Pain, thank you very much. ^^**

**Chapter 10: Irrevocable Bonds**

* * *

It had now been four months since Inuyasha left for Kikyo. In this course of time, the gang managed to gather a few shards, but had yet to encounter Naraku. Kagome's returns to modern Japan lasted slightly longer than before, when Inuyasha was with them, but the gang didn't begrudge her that. To the best of Kagome's knowledge, they never crossed paths with Inuyasha and Kikyo either.

That is, to the best of her knowledge.

It was once when Koga had ran Kagome back to the Bone Eater's well. Kagome had insisted that the gang need not waste the journey back, and she could always ask Kirara to bring her there, but Koga managed to insist on bringing her back himself. Within two hours of their departure, Inuyasha and Kikyo met the gang. Kikyo sat under a tree some distance away while they talked.

"How's everything, Inuyasha?" Miroku asked, as they sat down.

"We're fine, I guess,"- _we _being him and Kikyo rather than the gang now- "But I almost… lost Kikyo." Inuyasha proceeded to inform them on Naraku's transformation, that it was now impossible to smell him out. His audience frowned as they thought of a way to thwart that.

They couldn't think of anything.

"… Inuyasha," Shippo said. "What did you mean about Kikyo?"

"She almost died from Naraku's miasma," the hanyo replied. "But something… odd… happened."

Just as he was in despair for how to help Kikyo, he felt a sensation, both strikingly familiar and eerily odd, and suddenly Kikyo's wound was purified and healed, as if from his hand. They had no idea what to make of it, and it was a one off thing.

The gang listened in surprise- not only over the apparition but over something they knew that Inuyasha didn't. Kagome had told them of the exact situation, happening in her dream. She had been troubled by how real- yet how surreal- it felt. Up until now, they had no idea that it could, no, _was_, more than a dream. But they said nothing.

"You're looking around, Inuyasha," Sango observed, staring at the hanyo. "Are you looking for something?" _Or someone?_ Sango added to herself.

"Merely that I smelt that mangy wolf. He's with you, then?"

Sango gave a nod, and continued keeping an eye on his countenance. His harsh tone had lain a mutual ban on Kagome's name. Sango suddenly wondered if it was a coincidence that the pair appeared only after Kagome and Koga left. She couldn't work out whether the hanyo wanted to see or wanted to avoid Kagome more.

Inuyasha murmured about not keeping Kikyo waiting, and stood up to go.

Shippo burst out, "You're not going to ask how Kaogme is, then?"

The hanyo stared into his green eyes. In that gaze, it was louder than if Inuyasha had said, "No."

_He had chosen his path, and no one would stop him._

They left.

Having since heard that Naraku could not detected, though not told of its source or about her dream being true, Kagome had tried to train herself in sensing out energy pools. Theoretically, everyone had energy in them, and being able to sense the energy meant the ability of realizing the person's presence. Easier said than done, however.

Kagome only managed it once; since she began training a month ago. She almost had to cut off all her senses and meditate to achieve the intensity of her concentration enough to detect her surrounding energy. Yet the surroundings itself was very distracting- the plants held energy, the insects held energy, and even the wind had some form of energy. Although it was exciting that there was a possibility of harnessing energy from nature, it was so hard to achieve that it would be almost useless in a battle. And not to mention how vulnerable Kagome would become to do this is the middle of a fight!

Tonight, after defeating some monsters who came for the shards, they borrowed lodgings from a neighbouring village. The village had claimed that a wandering miko and a half demon had destroyed the petty demons which had plagued the village, and wasn't ken on taking them in without a fee until they heard that Kagome had healing powers.

* * *

"Have a good rest, miko-sama," the villager said, as he bowed to Kagome. She dipped her head, but could not miss the untrusting gaze he gave Koga.

"Yeesh," Koga muttered when he left. "It's like this in every village. Honestly, _I_ don't mind sleeping out in the open. Maybe they'll pay the monk to cleanse this room since _demons_ resided there."

"You know we wouldn't leave you outside, Koga-kun," Kagome said, smiling at him. "Furthermore, a storm's coming in."

Koga nodded and they practiced a moment on Kagome's absorption ability. By the time they were done, the monk and the exterminator had returned from a walk. ("Took you two long enough," Shippo said slyly.) Kagome took the usual position near Kagome- the spot Inuyasha used to sit and watch over the rest. The lamp was blown out.

Above them, the storm clouds began gathering.

* * *

Naraku felt an odd jolt of anger as he saw Kikyo sleep in Inuyasha's embrace. One part of him refused to accept the idea of him being jealous of that hanyo, another part of him recognized the fact and resented it. That part of him hated his weakness in regard to Kikyo.

This time, he was determined to put an end to it. He was going to be the most powerful yokai ever lived. A miko wasn't going to stand in his way. And neither will that half breed.

"With your beloved woman dead, how will you fight? Inuyasha…"

_

* * *

She was in the clearing again. Inuyasha smiled at her, warming her insides._ Only then did she realize that, always, no matter how hot the sun's rays were on her skin, she was cold. As if there was a block of ice surrounding her heart.

"Inuyasha…" she felt a surge of craving for the hanyo before her. She wanted to hold him, for him to hold her… even if it was just a dream.

_He turned away, and ran off after a very familiar figure. Kikyo. "I won't be seeing you, Kagome."_

He was leaving. Just like he did before. Kagome felt a stab of pain, immobilizing her.

"Inuyasha! Inuyasha! _Inuyasha!_"

Kagome jerked awake, crying. "Inuyasha!" She looked around wildly, before realizing where she was. And the tears ran down faster. _Inuyasha!_

* * *

Inuyasha fidgeted in his sleep.

In his dream, he was in Kaede's village again, under the sacred tree. _So many memories from there._

Suddenly, he was aware of someone standing behind him. He turned.

Ah… Kagome. She was fine, then. So beautiful, as before. He couldn't help but let himself smile at her. He was satisfied just to see her in his dreams. As long as she was alive, and well, he'd be happy.

"Inuyasha…." Kagome whispered.

He allowed himself to stare into her lovely face. The features he missed, but was destined not to be with. The features he loved so much. _Kagome…_

In the distance, he heard Kikyo beckon him. He habitually turned to go after Kikyo. After all, in reality, his priority _was _Kikyo. And this… was just another dream.

"I won't be seeing you, Kagome," he murmured. _Not until the next dream- I have to be with Kikyo. I owe her._

"Inuyasha! Inuyasha!" Kagome cried. He could smell the salt of her tears. But he didn't turn. It's just a dream.

"_Inuyasha!_"

His heart throbbed painfully, for causing the Kagome in his dreams such anguish. But he hardened his heart and continued on.

* * *

Koga awoke upon hearing Kagome mumble in her sleep.

"Inuyasha…"

He twitched. Even though Inuyasha left her, Kagome still dreamt about him? She still loved him? His eyes stung, but he forced the moisture back to its source.

"Inuyasha! Inuyasha! _Inuyasha!_" Kagome cried in her sleep. The salty smell of tears met his nose. Kagome woke up, and cried. Koga, his heart almost breaking, pulled her into his lap and hugged her tight.

"Kagome, it's just a dream. It's just a dream," he said, stroking her. He saw the monk peer at them through a half opened eye, the exterminator look at Kagome in agony, and the fox squeeze his eyes shut.

_They all love her, as do I, _he thought. _Different loves; and we feel for her sorrow._

_Inuyasha, you idiot!_

Kagome sobbed herself back to sleep against his chest. "I'm sorry, Koga," she murmured, as she gradually returned to slumberland. Only then did the others loosen up, and drift back to sleep themselves.

Koga looked down at the fragile girl in his arms._ I love Kagome. So much. So much I can't bear it._ He felt his face heat up-

Then, the crushing disappointment when he knew it wouldn't work out. _She loves Inuyasha. Still. And she's so cut up over him._

"Koga?"

"What, little fox?"

Shippo hesitated for a little. Koga let the silence continue unbroken. He ran his fingers through Kagome's hair, noting how pale she was compared to the time she was with Inuyasha, and eating less, too. And no matter how Kagome tried to smile, the pain in her eyes never deceived him. _Stupid mongrel! He doesn't deserve her._

"You love her, don't you?" Shippo asked, staring at Kagome as well.

Koga nodded, wondering what the young fox was thinking.

Shippo pulled out a golden locket from his pocket and turned it round and round in his small hand. He toyed with it, before speaking with carefully chosen words.

"This necklace… was something Kagome gave to Inuyasha. When we found Kagome in shock- when Inuyasha left- I found this in the soil," Shippo said slowly. "I thought that… when Kagome was better… She may want it back. Like how I wish I could have something to remember my parents by."

Shippo popped open the clutch, and showed Koga its contents. A wave of jealousy entered Koga's chest, smelling both Inuyasha and Kagome's scent on the images.

"You want _me_ to keep it? Why?" he asked through clenched teeth. _It'd only hurt her to see it._

"You're the one helping Kagome recover," Shippo replied as a matter of fact. "I know you read her flawlessly. You'd know when to pass it to her."

"Flattery will bring you nowhere, runt." Shippo laughed, as Koga took the locket.

"And protect Kagome," Shippo added, as he slouched away into his blanket once more.

_I'll do that without you telling me, stupid,_ Koga thought. _Even if it means me my life._

* * *

Hojou peered into Kagome's class, to see if she was back in school. Her desk was empty.

"Looking for Kagome? Hojou-kun," the girl called Yuka asked, spotting him. His face heated up as the surrounding students turned to look at him. Kyle, who was speaking to his girlfriend, looked at him as well.

"Uh, yeah," he replied, scratching his head.

"She's absent."

"I see," Hojou said, returning to his class next door. He had been to the Hiragushi residence two days ago and Kagome's grandfather said something about "dengue fever". He sighed.

Hojou never before realized how much Kagome was the reason for his enthusiasm for school. He felt a longing to see her from the centre of his being, and whenever someone passed in the corridor, he would irrationally expect it to be Kagome. _Was this what they call… love?_

His shoulders slumped a little when he remembered that Kagome had a boyfriend. Two months ago, Kagome was absent from school a long while because she "had depression". Yuka, Eri and Ayumi revealed to him then that Kagome had a boyfriend- but it seemed as if she hadn't gotten over his rejection. Judging by Kagome's behavior when she returned, it seemed as though she hadn't forgotten the guy.

Hojou couldn't hope for his feelings towards Kagome to be reciprocated. But still… he wanted to stay Kagome's favourite guy friend.

He looked out of the window. Wherever Kagome was, she was looking up in the same blue sky.

_Get well soon… Hiragushi._

_I… love you._

* * *

Kikyo's eyes widened as Naraku's tentacles went through her chest. A large amount of miasma was pumped into her wound, and she gasped at the excruciating pain. She saw something flash through Naraku's face, but had no time to identify it- he flung her away, hard.

Warm hands caught her, and she heard her name pronounced in a strangled voice. The voice which belonged to the person she loved most in the world.

_Naraku, I'll not just die like this._ Kikyo pulled out an arrow and shot with all her strength at Naraku's portion of the jewel. For a moment, it seemed like the light would reign in the jewel again, but Naraku tainted it.

"You've lost, Kikyo. And Inuyasha- how will you fight when your beloved dies?" Naraku said, as he disappeared with his miasma.

_Whether I've lost- Naraku, you'll understand the day you die._

She felt the wound of the miasma spread to the rest of her body.

They had fought so hard against Naraku, but in the end, Naraku managed to deal her a deadly blow. She looked up at Inuyasha and felt some joy seeing real emotion in his agonized face. As much as she wanted to be selfish and have Inuyasha forever, she had decided. For the greater good. For… Inuyasha's good.

"Inuyasha… Promise me one thing."

"Anything for you, Kikyo. You know that," Inuyasha said, a lump rising in his throat as Kikyo's breathing became harder.

"Return to… Kagome."

Inuyasha's eyes widened. "Kikyo!"

"Inuyasha, listen to me. This is my last wish. Return to Kagome," Kikyo insisted weakly.

"I'm not blind, you know. She changed you. She made you so much more gentle, into all I ever wanted. And you… Inuyasha. You are not complete without her. Those prayer beads," she said, touching them. "I could have taken them off in a second, you know.

"But I didn't. You'd be sad to have them taken away.

"You love her, Inuyasha. Don't hurt yourselves by staying away."

Inuyasha's eyes moistened again. "I'll always love you, Kikyo," he whispered, and kissed her.

She smiled.

"Thank you… Inuyasha."

* * *

Kagome's tears pooled over and ran down her cheeks, taking her by surprise. A huge wave of sorrow threatened to knock her down.

What _was_ this overwhelming sadness she felt?

"Look out, Kagome!" Koga shouted, as he pulled her away. He was fast- but not quick enough. Just as he jumped out of the way with Kagome in his arms, the demon's claw tore the fabric at Kagome's chest. Two lines along Kagome's white uniform turned red with her blood.

"Finish it off," Koga yelled to Sango.

"Kagome, are you alright?"

"Did it get you, Kagome-sama?"

"You're bleeding, Kagome-chan!"

"I'm fine," she assured them, as she wiped the tears away. "There was this overwhelming sadness all of a sudden…"

Kagome saw Koga's eyebrows furrowed in concern. She pressed her palm on her wounds and let out a bright golden glow. Within seconds, it was healed. She then closed her eyes and focused on the crushing feeling which felt at once familiar but foreign.

"I think…" Kagome heard herself say, and yet was almost certain it was true, "Kikyo's dead."

A stunned silence met her words- everyone stared at her.

Self conscious, Kagome looked down. Suddenly, she realized that her torn uniform was quite… _revealing._

She blushed, and everyone followed her eyes down. Miroku coughed, and Sango jabbed him. Shippo turned away. Koga blushed furiously.

Kagome fumbled in her bag for a change of clothes. Her other sets of clothing were dirty. She pulled out the hakama that Kaede-sama had given her, amazed at how she'd have known this day would come.

"I'm going to change," she said. "Sango, keep your eyes on them."

Koga flushed, if possible, even redder, as Kagome walked into the trees.

"You bet," Sango replied, as she pulled Miroku's ear, catching him stare at Kagome's retreating back.

* * *

**A lot of POVs, and the last bit is not really "irrevocable bonds". But I had to put it in this chapter. Please review!**


	11. Back

**Disclaimer: Rumiko Takahashi would have done a way better job on this than me...**

**This chapter is shorrrrrt~ I'm so sorry, but I feel that the rest of the story had do continue in the next chapter. This chapter would be dedicated to setting the scene for the return of our favourite hanyou. Thank you all so very much for the encouraging reviews (bows emotionally) and somehow I feel that I don't deserve getting so many "Favourite Story" alerts... THANK YOU ALL! ^^**

**Chapter 11: Back**

* * *

Koga thought that Kagome couldn't get any prettier, but he was mistaken. When Kagome stepped out of the woods in the miko outfit, he felt a tingle run thoughout his body. She was _gorgeous_!

Kagome caught his stare and asked, "How do I look?"

"The hakama is very becoming on you," he replied, at last finding his voice. "You look beautiful."

He was aware that when he said his first sentence, a few things happened simultaneously. Kagome's face clouded over, Shippo smacked his forehead with his small palm, Miroku gave a small sigh and Sango looked at Kagome in concern. He thought hard about what he said. What did he say wrong?

"Ah, but Kagome's always beautiful to you, Koga," Shippo said, sounding as though he was trying to salvage the situation. Koga flushed, and Kagome let out a weary laugh. "But somehow, I feel very uncomfortable donning this."

Koga looked at her with raised eyebrows. The hakama fit her perfectly- it was as if it was specially tailored for her. Not too long, and the fabric was good. So…

Then it hit him.

God, what a fool he was. Captivated by how stunning Kagome looked, he forgot that miko Inuyasha left with. _Kikyo_. Now that he looked at Kagome, he realized how alike the two of them looked.

"Ah, but Kagome-sama radiates an aura commanding respect," Miroku said, changing the subject. "We're going to have an easier time getting a roof over our heads at night."

"Sheesh, is slacking all you can think of?" Sango mock reprimanded. "You're turning into a pig!"

_Pop!_ Shippo turned into a pig and began oinking at Miroku. Kagome chuckled, and Koga heaved a small sigh of relief.

"Let's go."

* * *

Sesshomaru allowed Rin to run up to his half brother in concern. Inuyasha was wandering around with no sense of direction, and now that Sesshomaru saw him, looked as if his soul had departed with the dead miko.

"Why're we here, Sesshomaru-sama?" Jaken asked.

Sesshomaru ignored him. He actually didn't quite know what made him meet Inuyasha. He just found his legs leading him there.

"Inuyasha-sama!" Rin called as she pulled on the red Robe of the Fire Rat. Inuyasha looked down, and for a second, Sesshomaru saw his eyes flicker- then, it became lifeless again.

The golden eyed youkai was almost certain the hanyo saw the reflection of either miko in his Rin. Illogical as it seemed.

Rin began gathering berries as Inuyasha slumped against a tree.

"Naraku did this, did he?"

Inuyasha nodded. "He can hide his scent now."

_Explains._

Rin returned with some water and berries. "Here, Inuyasha-sama! I'm sure you haven't eaten for days!"

Inuyasha shook his head. The slow, detached manner with which the hanyou responded was proof that Inuyasha was hurting. And that he was starving himself. Sesshomaru's face twitched as Inuyasha growled at Rin, upon her insistence.

_Wham._

Sesshmaru's punch finally got Inuyasha to recover himself.

"_What's the big idea_?"

"Eat."

"You punched me just because I won't eat?"

"I'm not going to waste my time here," Sesshomaru said, turning on his heel. Inuyasha protested with a "You're the one who started it-!" but was silenced by Sesshomaru's cool voice.

"Do as you deem fit. But for the sake of the other girl, I think you should eat."

Inuyasha muttered, "She'd do better without me", but ate nevertheless.

"We're going, Rin."

Sesshomaru went away, feeling slightly perturbed. He looked at the little human girl alongside him. If she died, what would become of him?

He thought of Inuyasha's lifeless look.

_I'll never let that happen to Rin._

* * *

"You did it again, Kagome-chan!" Sango exclaimed, giving Kagome a pat on her back.

"Thanks to Koga-" Koga's heart skipped a beat skipped a beat when Kagome called him by his name, instead of calling him Koga_-kun_. "-practicing with me every day."

Miroku observed that Kagome didn't purify the monster this time. Kagome explained that she was toying with the idea of storing energy, as she took out a glass jar. She pressed her palm to its mouth, as everyone gathered around to watch.

Kagome focused on releasing the energy into the jar. The jar began to shake. Then-

_Smash!_

Kagome looked down at the jar. It had smashed into small pieces. It was silent about her, and she hurriedly apologized. "Is everyone okay? Did the glass-"

"No, but Ka-Kagome…" Shippo said, looking shocked as he pointed to something behind her. Glancing over her shoulder, she startled.

Inuyasha. _Inuyasha! He came back!_

Her eyes eagerly ran over those familiar features, the features she sought after like a hungry wolf.

For a moment, she couldn't bring herself to move her feet. Dozens of emotions ran through her, joy, surprise… _longing_. His lips parted slightly. Kagome's heart raced, hurting a little, as the tears in her heart throbbed.

"Kikyo?" Inuyasha mouthed. Only then did Kagome realize that the amber eyes were not seeing her, but the Kikyo in her. The earth beneath her feet seemed to shake. All at once, the mixed emotions Kagome had been suppressing for so long broke free. She felt like she was going to be sick. Kikyo? _Kikyo?_ Her hands trembled and she turned sharply around. Freedom from this all never appeared so much to Kagome.

Why had she ever believed that Inuyasha loved her? Why did he lead her on?

Why did fate have to pull her leg, making her suffer over and over again on from the let down?

The stinging tears pooled up in her eyes as a sensation akin to crushing on her heart.

She ran.

She was wrong to have let hope creep into her heart. In the end, she would just fall, more painfully than before.

Halting only when she'd reached the shade of the trees, Kagome threw herself against a boulder and cried. She had been an idiot to let her heart rule over her. All this time, all this time… _There was no hope._

* * *

Inuyasha's heart shattered as he watched Kagome run away from him. But the pain of that was shadowed by the hurt of losing Kikyo.

He hadn't meant to hurt her, but the instant he saw her, he honestly believed her to be Kikyo. Every time he closed his eyes, Kikyo appeared. That time Rin looked into his face, he thought she was Kikyo, for a moment.

Koga glared daggers at Inuyasha, and raced off after Kagome. "You guys carry on to the village. We'll catch up."

Some part of Inuyasha wanted to growl at Koga and ask him to shove off. But a little voice whispered to him inside his mind: _Isn't this what you wanted? Koga to be with Kagome?_

"You're not going after Kagome, Inuyasha?" Miroku asked. Inuyasha shook his head, and Shippo knocked Inuyasha's head.

"_What d'you mean you're not going after her?_"

"Drop it! Okay?" Inuyasha snapped. Anyway, what was the pint? Koga would take care of her. Anyhow… He wouldn't be doing either girls justice if he chased after Kagome. Right after Kikyo's death. "Besides, I-I only came back because it was Kikyo's last request."

A stunned silence met his words. Then, Shippo walked away. "I hate you, Inuyasha."

Inuyasha started, and childishly asked, "Do you two hate me too?" _And… Kagome?_

"I hope that you know that you're lying to yourself, deep down, Inuyasha," Sango replied coldly.

"Let's head to the village," Miroku said, not looking at Inuyasha. "It's getting dark soon."

Inuyasha followed silently. He had returned to the gang, but he was beginning to feel like an outcast once more.

* * *

The little fox had said that he could read Kagome flawlessly. Yes, but now, he'd almost wish that he couldn't. He didn't want to reconcile to the fact that Kagome loved Inuyasha so deeply.

He had seen it in her eyes- she was overflowing with love for Inuyasha- and in her heart, Inuyasha would always take first place, and second place was far from that. How much he envied Inuyasha! And yet, that blockhead didn't treasure her.

_I ditched her. Why do I have to know where that pathetic human is?_ This line Inuyasha had said rang in his ears, and Koga gnashed his teeth together. _He doesn't deserve her!_

He made Kagome cry. And yet, and yet… Kagome still loved Inuyasha. He dumped her, and hurt her time and again- and Kagome still… _still…_

What he would give to have Kagome love _him_ so much!

Koga found Kagome crying against a hard boulder, crumpled in a heap from despair. His heart ached.

Gently, he lifted her from the ground and enveloped her in his arms, eliciting from her a little gasp. Was it his imagination, or did Kagome cry harder upon realizing that he was not Inuyasha?

_Another painful throb._

Deep in his heart, he was crying out what Kagome certainly was as well.

_But I'm here!_

_I'm here, but you are thinking of him! I'm here!_

_Notice me!_

_Love me!_

_I… love you so much. Can't you see? I love you. More than anything else in the world. More than my life. _

_I love you._

It was a long time before Kagome composed herself. She brought a glowing palm to her heart, then, removed her palm with a little sigh. She couldn't heal herself- it was a psychological wound. And that's why... She still felt such acute pain.

"Let's catch up with Sango-chan and the others," Kagome said hoarsely.

* * *

**Please review! I promise to get the next chapter up as soon as possible... ^^**


	12. Decisions

**Disclaimer: The respective characters belong to their respective creators. Not me.**

**Hi all, thanks so much for all the reviews! Really appreciate it. ^^ On the downside, I ain't very satisfied with this chapter... I'm not sure if I emphasized the feelings enough. Currently I'm thinking that I may redo this chapter- but please tell me what you think! ^^**

**Chapter 12: Decisions**

* * *

Kagome promised to return at sunset a week later, then climbed into the well.

Seven days passed quite slowly if you had speed like Koga did, especially when the only reason you stayed around- i.e. Kagome- was at her homeland and your rival in love was all you had to look forward to.

After watching Kagome fall into the well in a burst of light, Koga had trudged to the clearing nearby. Trying to collect his thoughts, he'd sat under a tall tree- a tree with a diamond shaped scrape on its trunk. The leaves rustled peacefully in the breeze.

_I love Kagome with all my heart,_ Koga thought. _But she loves Inuyasha. That idiot Inuyasha… He just hurts her every time._ Images flashed across his mind again and again; he didn't know how to feel. All his emotions, his love for Kagome, the pain knowing that she wouldn't choose him, his anger at Inuyasha… They seemed like they were mixed into a pot and being boiled over a fire.

_What do I do? _he sighed in exasperation, closing his eyes.

Slowly, gradually, without Koga's realization, a sense of peace crept into his heart.

When he opened his eyelids again, everything was clear to him. Finally.

He loved Kagome, and would do anything for her happiness.

Now, the only thing standing between Kagome and happiness was the memories that hurt her. There would only be two solutions to that. Either Inuyasha proves his love to Kagome, or the painful memories would have to be sealed away from her. There was no other way. He, Koga, couldn't bring Kagome the happiness that Inuyasha could. That was for sure. Kagome didn't and couldn't want him.

Koga's face spasmed in pain.

_But I can't count on that blockhead,_ he thought, pacing around. Then… he had to have the backup plan: sealing Kagome's memories. Once he was sure Inuyasha would bring nothing but pain to her…

Though he must try not to resort to that. _For… Kagome's sake._

Koga got up, and began running. Hesitantly at first, then he picked up speed.

There was this human being he heard some demons talk of before. She lived alone near a forest and a lake, and was different from other creatures, although human. This woman possessed magical abilities- rumour has it that she could read your heart by being near you, could kill demons and humans alike without shedding a single drop of blood… and could seal memories. Yet it was not everyone who sought her help would receive it; Hanajima-san mainly turned them away and left them to their own resources. As time went by, almost no one asked Hanajima-san for help. More likely than not, they'd be turned down.

By sunrise the next day, he had reached.

A plain, black hut set beside a beautiful lake. Behind the hut, an endless forest stretched. It was a tranquil place, but solitary. Secluded.

"What do you want, wolf?" came a soft voice from behind. Koga jumped, as a woman clad from head to toe in black appeared behind him. _He hadn't heard her._

"I need your help, woman," he replied, following her into the hut.

"Don't they all," Hanajima-san said. She gestured him to sit. Koga reluctantly did.

After a moment of silence, she asked. "What are you here for, wolf?"

Koga began hesitantly, but soon he had related the entire situation to this woman. Hanajima listened without expression, sipping a mug of tea.

"Are you counting on the girl loving you, upon forgetting the hanyou?"

"Of course not!" Koga protested. "I thought you could read minds, _woman_?"

"Indeed I do," Hanajima murmured. "Good. Because the girl won't really forget the hanyou."

"What do you mean?" _Does that mean she'll help?_

Hanajima made no reply. After concentrating for some time, she spoke.

"I'll need an item."

"Payment?"

The woman stared at him. It felt as if her eyes could see right through him, and Koga looked away uncomfortably. She looked human, and smelt the part too; her dark hair was plaited right down to her waist. And the ebony eyes spelt loneliness. This woman was probably like Kagome- born with a gift and made to follow the path set for her. Bringing her above ordinary humans… yet away from her fellows. Alone. _Kagome… wouldn't be alone,_ he thought fiercely. _She's got me. And _him_,_ he added unhappily, feeling a heavy weight on his chest.

"Yours is an altruistic cause. I require no payment," Hanajima said, staring into his eyes. "An item, that the girl will have to keep by her."

Koga's eyes widened as it hit him.

_The necklace!_

He hurriedly pulled out the golden chain the little fox had entrusted to him. _It was almost like fate…_

"Return in three days."

* * *

The cold air conditioning of the library made Kagome's mind move slower. She read the question over and over again, barely absorbing anything. Sighing, she set down her pen and looked over at her friends, who were chatting together. As she tuned, Kagome thought she saw a flash of sliver.

_Could it be-?_

_No,_ she thought, as she stared around. No, it was just her imagination. She was thinking too much about Inuyasha, and imagined it. There was no possibility… of him coming now.

Kagome's eyes were downcast as she recalled the tension in the room as she and Koga entered. How had she used to behave around Inuyasha? How did she normally behave? Kagome couldn't recall, but she was afraid. She didn't want Inuyasha to be disgusted and leave. It painfully possible- _after all… Inuyasha never loved her._

Kagome felt icy daggers stab at her heart.

_She didn't want to lose him again._

Knowing that he was there… was…

_No, it wasn't enough. But… it's as far as it can get._

She remembered how involuntarily her eyes were drawn to that of Inuyasha's. But Inuyasha… never gave her one glance.

The ice in her heart grew.

"Kagome, 'you okay?" Ayumi asked in concern. "You seem a little out of it."

Kagome looked up to see five pairs of eyes looking intently at her. She blinked rapidly, bringing herself back to the present, and forced a smile.

"I'm fine. I just… felt dizzy all of a sudden," Kagome lied. She saw Eri's eyebrows come together and Kyle raise an eyebrow. The other three began worrying about her.

"I swear it's because you ate too little during lunch," Yuka chided, hands on her hips.

"You should rest, Higurashi," Hojou suggested. "I'll walk you home if you like!"

"Why don't we all?" Kyle's cold voice said, cutting across Kagome's half formed objection. "We're done for today, aren't we?"

Eri seconded Kyle, and began packing the books back into their bags. Hojou's face fell just a little, then recovered himself. They left the library, and continued talking. Kagome felt herself obliged to keep up with the conversation up 'til the sanctuary that was her home.

"Thank you for accompanying Kagome-chan home," her mother said with a smile. The group assured her that it was no trouble. After a lot of civilities and what seemed like ages, they left.

Kagome retreated to her bedroom and began packing. She had promised to return at sunset of the seventh day.

At that time, she really couldn't bear it. Inuyasha never once spoke to her, called her by name, or looked at her. It was as though she was inexistent. Like he didn't care. Like he'd never cared.

_So close yet so far._

And Kagome couldn't stand it. She returned to the other side of the well- but it didn't help either. Inuyasha was out of sight- not out of mind.

Kagome decided that she would treat Inuyasha like she did Koga. She'd smile, like it didn't bother her, that she was fine. She'd face Inuyasha… like it never happened. She could, and she would.

"You're leaving already, Kagome?"

"Yes, Jii-chan," Kagome replied, as she carried her backpack to the door. "If possible, could you please find something that has dizziness as a symptom?"

"Be safe, Kagome-chan," her mother called over her grandfather's excited exclamations of "Brain hemorrhage!"

Kagome waved, and headed for the well-house.

Souta caught up with her. Kagome saw that something was troubling him, but it was as if he couldn't find the words.

"Something the matter, Souta?"

The boy hesitated.

"Yeah. Actually, it's that Kyle."

Kagome raised her eyebrows and invited him to carry on.

"I don't like him. I think he's suspicious. I heard him ask Jii-chan why you were sick so often."

Kagome's eyes narrowed.

"I see. I'll worry about it when I come back. But do keep track if he comes by," she said, climbing into the well. "I don't like him either."

* * *

Koga helped Kagome out of the well. She had changed back to her usual dress.

Kagome thanked him with a smile. Looking at her carefully, he noted that she looked as worn as before- her trip home had not done her any visible help. Koga felt extra aware of the locket hidden within his armour. It felt warm against his body.

He had returned to Hanajima-san's hut at the stated time. There, after making incantations and incantations, she made Koga focus on his cause and touch the locket.

Koga felt all his love overwhelm him all of a sudden, as the light surrounding the locket turned from silver to a beautiful shade of pink. The locket shuddered, then just as suddenly, became motionless.

The wolf demon shook away his blush and asked, "Is it complete?"

"It is complete," came the reply, as Hanajima-san handed him the locket. It was comfortably warm.

"The locket will seal her memory when both you and the girl are touching this locket, and your feelings are that you felt just now.

"But it can be broken," she told him. "Surely you can guess why?"

Koga frowned and made no answer.

"It will break under one of these two conditions.

"One: your regard for the girl ceases. That's because the prime motivation for this sealing is your regard for her happiness.

"Two: your worry is unfounded," Hanajima-san said, showing him out. "I'm sure you know how _that'd_ be."

Koga looked at Kagome, her body resting on his back and her gentle fingers holding his shoulders. He bit his lip, drawing blood.

Yes, he knew when that'd be. When Inuyasha finally comes to his senses and claims Kagome.

_But meanwhile, please don't deny me these small pleasures._

* * *

"Inuyasha, do you mind going to the kitchen and ask them for two more portions?" Miroku asked, waking Inuyasha from his reverie. "We expect Kagome-sama and Koga to return tonight."

Inuyasha's ears twitched at Kagome's name.

"Keh."

He pulled open the sliding door and headed to the kitchen. After passing the message to a hysteric cook and hearing a tirade of apologies, Inuyasha escaped to the corridor for a breather. For the past few days, he was keenly aware of eveyone's scrutiny of him. He didn't need to ask to know that they were wondering what he planned to do about Kagome- how he felt towards Kagome.

And _how_ did he feel towards Kagome? Inuyasha wasn't all that sure.

He had loved her and Kikyo both, fervently. But after Inuyasha decided that he owed Kikyo, and left with her, he had tried to convince himself that Kikyo was the one he loved. And yet… he was never fully free from his feelings towards Kagome. He felt like a two-timing bastard.

_Yet_, he thought as his his cheeks tingled, when Kagome was near him, his heart pounded hard and fast.

In her absence, he'd finally come to terms with Kikyo's death. Kikyo, he loved deeply, but she was his past. Kagome was his present, his future. He had done his part- Kikyo died, having forgiven him. It was long overdue, but Inuyasha was finally going to put a full stop there, and move on.

He dreamt of Kagome almost every day while she was gone. In those dreams, they were back like they were before.

_Her lips, so soft on his own. Kagome's soft form against his chest. Feeling her heart pound against his skin…_

Inuyasha's face flushed, and he heard his heart race.

_Get a grip,_ he thought. Inuyasha took the food from the cook's hands, amid protests. His heart didn't calm down much, but he comforted himself with the fact that he could regain his composure before Kagome came back.

The sliding door opened sharply before Inuyasha could push it open with his foot. Her scent hit his like a tidal wave, freezing him into place.

Kagome was back.

_God, how did I manage to convince myself that she was nothing to me?_

Inuyasha looked down at her eagerly and fervently, unable to help himself. He searched her face for a hint of softening in her features, which would suggest that she was pleased to see him. He wanted to hear his name spoken by her again in that loving tone.

Inuyasha's heart sank as he realized a split second too late that it was not to be. The perfect chocolate eyes had darted down almost instinctively, and Kagome's face scrunched up in pain.

Then, she walked past his motionless figure, brushing against his shoulder as she passed.

_As though they were mutual strangers._

And as if it didn't hurt enough, Koga followed behind Kagome_, his Kagome_, his blue eyes glaring.

How long it passed after Inuyasha stared after the two of them he wasn't sure.

But after sometime, he became aware that the bowls were rattling.

Inuyasha looked down.

His hands were shaking.


	13. Progress

**Disclaimer: Yeah, well, Rumiko Takahashi wouldn't have allowed Inuyasha to leave with Kikyo, would she? ^^**

**Thanks for the amazing reviews! Really really appreciate it from the bottom of my heart. Here's the next chapter! The following chapter would come quicker, I promise. It's something I had been drafting since I thought of this storyline. =) Does anyone want to guess what the next chapter will bring? ^^  
Oh yeah, the bulk of this chapter is based on episode 43- I changed afew things, though. Inuyasha's Tessaiga doesn't get snapped, for one. Just let him have gotten over that barrier earlier, kay? ^^ Please enjoy!**

**Chapter 13: Progress**

* * *

"You're not going to do anything, Naraku?" Kagura asked. "Inuyasha is with Kagome again, in case you haven't noticed."

There was a pause where Kagura turned to look at Naraku. Naraku had been unusually inactive for the past weeks, doing neither shard hunting nor attacking Inuyasha. In fact, he had been isolating himself- brooding and brooding. Kagura could sense that he was _not_ cooking up a plan to destroy Inuyasha and the others. If she wasn't so certain that Naraku had neither conscience nor a heart, she would have thought him sad.

Kanna came forward and flashed an image in her mirror. It was that of Inuyasha holding Kikyo in her last moments. Kagura's eyes widened in surprise.

_Could Naraku be sorry that Kikyo died?_ She stared at the demon in question_. Did he want Kikyo?_

Ridiculous, she thought. If he had, Naraku had most certainly put an end to his own happiness. He had gloated on how Inuyasha wouldn't be capable of fighting after Kikyo's death. How ironic.

"Although it is none of _your_ business, Kagura," Naraku said, looking sharply at her, "you will have the task of leading your brother to meet Inuyasha's party after he is born. I'm sure you'll find him a most… _interesting_ creature."

* * *

Miroku, Sango and Shippo had bet amongst themselves how long the two would take to get back together on the day Inuyasha returned. The highest bet was a month- but none of them imagined that they could remain thus for _two_ months. They had severely underestimated Inuyasha's stubbornness and the effect of Kagome's insecurities.

At times, they would get so exasperated they were on the verge of screaming "Just tell her already!" or "He loves you, Kagome, he's just too thick to say it!" but they shut their mouths and hoped that the two would get a move on already.

When they went to sleep at night, Inuyasha would sleep as far as he could from Kagome- the opposite end of the room or a tree far away. And yet, it was obvious that they pined for each other.

Kagome could not bear to look into Inuyasha's face, and was on the edge every time he was close. And yet, whenever she was safe from his scrutiny, she'd gaze at INjyasha for extended periods, as though reminiscing.

The air between the two seemed congealed. While Kagome's countenance plainly showed that the awkwardness and Inuyasha's cold demeanour pained her, Inuyasha managed to look passive. Yet, despite his outward appearances, the number of times his eyes darted to her face (or his ears pricked up at her voice, or the number of times he looked up when Inuyasha caught her scent) in a day exceeded the number of fingers they had altogether. Or maybe even toes. It was plain to the most shortsighted person- and yet, the parties involved were dimly oblivious.

Koga continued to carry Kagome on their journeys, and was the only one accompanying her when she returned to Kaede's village. Despite the fact that Inuyasha usually bugged Kagome to return every alternate day, he refused to budge an inch.

Inuyasha had watched with skeptism to Kagome's newfound abilities. He watched Kagome heal villages in surprise. But the disbelief was nothing compared to when Kagome absorbed the energy of a demon in the middle of a fight.

"What d'you mean, _energy absorption_?" Inuyasha had demanded of Miroku. "Even Kikyo-!"

Kagome turned away stiffly, and Koga glared at Inuyasha.

_If looks could kill…_

"I mean, not even Midoraku…" Inuyasha amended lamely.

"Kagome's unique, dumbass," Koga snapped. Inuyasha's drooped as he heard the implication- Kagome wasn't Kikyo. He had stared after Kagome, looking truly dejected. But Kagome didn't speak for the rest of the day. Nor the following day. Today was the seventh day… of Kagome's silent treatment of him. The gang wasn't sure whether or not to be sorry for him. But Koga hadn't such reservations-

"He deserved it," he muttered venomously.

* * *

Sesshomaru watched Rin as she pulled his fur around her in her sleep. Maybe the fire was not warm enough, he thought, as he threw more wood into the dying flames. Slowly… without moving Rin.

She murmured something in her sleep. Something that sounded like his name- there was a satisfying sensation in him as he registered that.

Jaken was right. As compared to him, the long serving youkai, Sesshomaru was biased towards the little human girl beside him.

Sesshomaru watched as the faintest hint of the sun began rising in the east.

Then, he blinked, and sniffed the air.

_Naraku_.

But Naraku's scent was concealed, wasn't it?

It could be a detachment.

The sun was rising soon; he could give Rin a few more moments of undisturbed rest. Then he would trace the detachment to Naraku.

He sniffed again, and caught Inuyasha's scent.

_With the girl again, hm?_

Well, hopefully that foolish half breed had enough brains to chase after the real thing.

_

* * *

Often times in memory, we have the tendency to overly romanticize the people we care about._

_Was that what happened to me?_ Kagome wondered. After Inuyasha had yet again compared her to Kikyo, Kagome had felt an uncontrollable burst of anger whenever Inuyasha looked her in the eye. _But no, _she thought, sighing. The longing for Inuyasha had not died- she was constantly reminded of that. Yet the rage was also true.

Perhaps she was craving for Inuyasha to view her as Kagome, Kagome Higurashi; and yet, every time he looked her way Kagome was sure he was seeking Kikyo, and fumed. And in an odd way, it seemed to make sense.

And it was about that time that Kagome really noticed Koga's kindness towards her. He was like the big brother she never had- always there, always worrying for her, always there for her when Inuyasha hurt her. Always standing up for her.

_But it can never work out,_ Kagome sighed. How much had she hurt him, by keeping him by her side? Forced to see how cut up she was by Inuyasha's words and actions, how much did Koga hurt himself?

Kagome asked him once- "Koga, why do you stay?"

"Because I care for you, Kagome," he had replied.

Suddenly, Inuyasha stopped in his tracks. "Naraku's scent," he said, ready to sprint in its direction.

"Hold it, dog turd," Koga responded, getting an annoyed twitch from Inuyasha. "I thought Naraku's scent was _concealed_?"

"He's right," Miroku said with a frown. "It could be a trap, Inuyasha."

"Trap or no trap," Inuyasha replied through clenched teeth. "Unless you've got better ideas?"

Koga sniffed the air.

"There's the stench of blood," Koga added. "'You want to put Kagome's life at stake?"

Inuyasha returned a defiant glare.

"My priority is Naraku."

_Meaning Inuyasha doesn't give a damn about me_, Kagome thought, as pain seared through her chest.

"If Kagome is hurt because of this, you stupid half breed, you're dead meat."

* * *

Goshinki smiled to himself as he saw the gang's futile efforts to vanquish him. He saw their minds, all of them- they could not thwart him, not them feeble creatures.

A joke that the hanyou Inuyasha wanted to punish him for destroying the village! A joke that the girl should think of firing a purifying arrow at his purple body. A joke that the wolf demon should think they had a chance of getting away alive.

_A joke!_ he thought, as he ducked the Tessaiga with 'speed disproportionate to his size'. The monk was nothing without his Wind Tunnel- and he was crippled with worry for the Sango girl.

_Foolish girl! She brought it unto herself with that boomerang,_ he thought, as he felt the satisfying sensation of his claws cutting through flesh. Inuyasha fell to the ground, clutching his wound.

_I'll take them down one by one- no hurry._

He heard Kagome contemplate how to reach Inuyasha. _I need to heal him!_

Goshinki swiped at her, but there was a flash of sudden movement; then, the blood spilled- not the girl's, but the wolf's.

_He didn't even think about it?_ Goshinki thought bemusedly.

"Koga!" Kagome cried, as she saw the gaping wound on Koga's back.

"I'm fine," he insisted, but she shook her head.

"To stop the bleeding."

"Thanks, Kagome," he replied, bounding up to fight again.

As Goshinki fought Inuyasha and Koga alternately, he became aware that Kagome was attempting to absorb his energy from afar.

"Fat chance," he said, swiping at her. Yet again, Koga plunged himself in front of her in the nick of time. _He would regret it,_ Goshinki thought, watching in amusement as Koga fell to the ground once more, groaning in pain. That swipe almost severed through all the muscles at the back of his thighs- a bit of white from his bone showed before it turned red with his blood. The wolf's face was drained of coloiur.

Goshinki swiped again at the miko girl before she could tend to Koga. She gasped as she tripped; a rock's timely intervention saved her skin.

"_Bastard_-!" Inuyasha thought and shouted at the same time, jumping forward with his Tessaiga, eyes flashing. Goshinki knocked the blade from Inuyasha's hand hardly, and plunged his claws into Inuyasha's stomach. A distance away, the kitsune screamed "No!"

Inuyasha fell with a choked gurgle, and the Tessaiga flew at Kagome- she'd only ducked in time.

_Three down,_ Goshinki thought with a satisfied smirk as he rounded on Kagome. _I shall devour this girl first…_

The girl backed off from the wolf, thinking, _Oh no. Inuyasha-!_

"Too bad, little girl. Inuyasha is-"

_No_. Goshinkin thought, as he turned to see Inuyasha fly at him_. What the-!_

A sharp pain seared across his arm, or where his arm used to be. The pain stumbled him for a moment; it was a sensation totally new to him.

"I'm _what_, you were saying?"

* * *

Shippo looked in horror at the new Inuyasha as he faced off with Goshinki.

"It's almost as if he were a full demon now," Miroku said.

Youkai versus youkai- in such a case, they probably wouldn't die in Goshinki's claws. Shippo looked at Sango, her face scrunched up with pain, and Miroku hovering worriedly about her. Sango's Hiraikotsu had been thrown back at her from Goshinki. Koga was down and losing lots of blood. Inuyasha… he had been mauled quite badly with a hole through his stomach- but now, the wound looked very much healed.

And yet, Shippo couldn't help but shudder at this new Inuyasha, the red-eyed, merciless youkai.

Goshinki gave a yell, before he fell as pieces of flesh at Inuyasha's feet.

Shippo saw Inuyasha's cold smile and shivered. There was bloodlust in those eyes, the eyes he thought he knew so well. And for the first time, he was truly afraid.

"Inuyasha-" Kagome murmured, her eyes fixed on the silver-haired person before her. The first time, Shippo noted, in an entire week. Or more.

"Get back!" Inuyasha growled, making Kagome jump. "I don't know what things I'll do now!"

Koga groaned a little, and Inuyasha turned to glare at the fallen wolf. His face was full of animosity; Shippo felt a thrill down his spine.

Kagome, as if entranced, took another step forward.

"Kagome… don't…" Koga groaned, trying to get up.

"No, Kagome!" Shippo protested, his heart racing with worry. _Don't! Don't!_

"Kagome-sama!"

Kagome continued oblivious to them.

"Inuyasha…" Kagome whispered, taking small steps towards him, who had now turned to face her, growling under his breath. Inuyasha twitched slightly upon hearing Kagome speak his name. The last time she addressed him seemed so long ago.

"Inuyasha, _osuwari_."

_Slam_.

"What the hell, Kagome?" he shouted, pulling his face out of the dirt.

_

* * *

Thank god!_ Kagome thought, as she saw Inuyasha's eyes return to gold. The gold she loved so much.

How many times had she looked into those eyes of molten gold, and lost herself in them? How many times had they stared into her lovingly?

_Inuyasha_.

Her heart swelled with overflowing love for the hanyou in front of her. It felt like it would burst with her love for him.

Without really realizing what she was doing, she ran to Inuyasha. At that moment, she didn't care if Inuyasha had left with Kikyo, so many times before. She didn't care if he had hurt her. Again and again. She didn't care.

_Inuyasha!_

All she wanted was to be able to care for him again. To love him. She should have known that her love for him wouldn't change. Kagome was never able to treat Inuyasha how she did Koga. Not what her feelings to Inuyasha and Koga were so different. She wanted to throw her arms around him, an impulse that resonated strongly from within. Kagome saw Inuyasha's arms twitch. If Inuyasha would embrace her, she would take death with no regrets.

So it came as a surprise when Kagome found herself pushed roughly away. It took two seconds to realize that Inuyasha, _Inuyasha_ had pushed her back.

Suddenly, the words he said as he left came back to her.

'_You never cared?'_ she had asked.

'_Never.'_

Her throat constricted painfully as tears pooled in her eyes. She couldn't bear his rejection again. Her heart, so fragilely pieced together, shattered into small pieces. Her breath felt heavy. Her immediate instinct- flight.

Kagome turned to run.

"Kagome!"

It wasn't Inuyasha who called- it was Koga. He was immobile on the ground, still bleeding profusely from his wounds. His face was pale and contorted with pain.

_But the pain in his eyes weren't a result of his wounds._

With a throb of her heart, Kagome bent to heal him.

"Ka-Kagome," Inuyasha said, coming towards her.

The temptation to run was so great, and her longing to run into his arms tore her wounds wide open again. She couldn't bear to look at him right now.

"Kagome," Inuyasha said again. He was just inches from her- Kagome could almost feel his breath upon her neck.

_He must really hate me,_ Kagome thought numbly, remembering how his eyes looked on the day they parted. She put her hand up. _I want his love! Not his sympathy!_

A pink shield erupted from her palm as the tears she had been holding back ran down her cheeks.

Inuyasha was thrown back several metres.

"Ka- _Kagome_! I'm sorry!" Inuyasha said, as he came forward again.

_I don't want your sympathy! I won't hear it!_ She thought, crying. Instantly, the shield misted over, blocking both sound and image. Inuyasha was thrown back again and again as he tried to get to Kagome.

But she didn't see it anymore.

Every time he touched the shield, he felt an overwhelming sorrow pass through him.

_Kagome's sorrow._

"Kagome!" he shouted, as he ran into the barrier once more. It threw him back.

"Stop it, Inuyasha!" Miroku said, holding him down. "You are opening your wounds!"

"Like I care! _Kagome!_"

_Thud_.

Inuyasha slumped to the ground, his head spinning. Then, the blackness of his eyelids greeted him. 


	14. Sealing

**AHH~ Very important! Before you continue to read this chapter, I'd like to urge all who have not read the edited version of chapter 13 to read it first. The unedited portion ends with Inuyasha being sat by Kagome. The edited version ends with Inuyasha blacking out. Sorry, I read it through and realised that I just couldn't place this scene into chapter 14. Thanks! ^^**

**Disclaimer: And, no, Rumiko Takahashi wouldn't have put Inuyasha and Kagome through this ordeal. Nor Koga, for that matter.**

**Slight notes at the end- for now, please enjoy. =)**

**Chapter 14: Sealing**

* * *

Inuyasha bolted up, and looked around for Kagome.

"You're up, Inuyasha?" Miroku asked. He was sitting beside Sango, who was, too, awake. "You were out some time."

"Where's Kagome?" Inuyasha demanded, looking around the room. Miroku, Sango, Shippo and Kirara were in the hut with him, but Kagome and Koga were nowhere to be seen.

"I don't think you should go just yet," Miroku said, as Sango sat up as well. "Kagome-sama was nearly hysterical when she refused to rest under the same roof as yourself."

Inuyasha's heart sank. He slumped against the wall, suddenly exhausted.

"Koga's… with her, then?"

Shippo nodded.

Inuyasha sighed deeply. Why had he thought for an instant that Kagome loved him? It was impossible, impossible, impossible. IN the end, Koga's the one good for her. And he couldn't blame her for making this choice- had he not chosen Kikyo over her? Had he not caused her pain? Had he not deserved it? Damn it. _Damn it,_ he thought, as he punched the ground in frustration.

"You shouldn't think that, Inuyasha," Shippo said.

"_What_, runt?"

"Giving Kagome up. You shouldn't do that," Shippo replied calmly.

"She doesn't love _me_."

Sango picked up a pebble from the ground and threw it at Inuyasha's head.

"_What's the big idea?"_

"Is it empty down there? Are your eyes knotholes? Kaogme-chan not love _you_!" Sango fumed.

"Then why is she ignoring me?"

"Look in a mirror, stupid," Shippo suggested.

"It's because she's afraid you'll reject her again, doofus!" Sango replied, exasperated.

Inuyasha couldn't help but feel a spark of hope light up in his chest, but he disregarded it.

"That doesn't make sense!"

"And what are _you_ doing?" Shippo countered.

"How can Kagome love me when she's always around that mangy wolf!"

Sango let out an exasperated groan, and Shippo threw his arms up, rolling his eyes.

Miroku looked at Inuyasha.

"What does _your_ heart tell you, Inuyasha? What you've seen, heard, and felt- use your heart to process it. What does _your_ heart say?"

Inuyasha closed his eyes.

Kagome looked so torn up. Her eyes had been overflowing with love for him- he pushed her back. She must have felt so rejected.

But… He had pushed her back for fear that he would hurt her! He thought he was still in demon form! It was ironic that trying to protect her… hurt her even deeper.

_Kagome, Kagome, Kagome…_

'_I want to be with you, Inuyasha.'_

'_I love hanyou Inuyasha!'_

"In the end, Inuyasha, it is your heart that counts," Miroku said.

But Inuyasha barely heard him.

_Kagome_.

He pushed the door flap aside and walked into the night.

* * *

Koga fingered the bottles of sake as he watched Kagome turn fitfully in her sleep.

After healing him, she was shaking. But from the drain in energy, or the pain of Inuyasha's rejection? Perhaps both.

He had stared into the face he loved so much- to see Kagome look as though her life had gone out of her. She looked worse than he had ever seen her, counting the day Inuyasha returned and the day he found her running a fever. But now Kagome had no strength, no strength to keep up the barest mask.

Koga drained a bottle of sake.

She had gasped as she saw the stupid mutt's wound, and bent immediately by his side. The golden glow flowed from her palm to Inuyasha's wounds unceasingly; she wobbled violently as the bleeding ceased, but refused to let go.

_At that moment, Koga noticed that the golden glow… was the same shade as Inuyasha's eyes._

Koga downed the next bottle.

The monk had shot him a look before offering Kagome _his_ energy, which Kagome accepted gratefully.

He only allowed Koga to volunteer his energy to heal Sango.

_Why? I thought the monk would help Sango instead._

Koga thought about it, but saw no answer. He sighed, and he swallowed the next bottle.

It was Kagome's shriek that made up his mind. Though Kagome had given everything to heal Inuyasha, she was hysterical about being in the same room as he. The pain and fear in her eyes… he couldn't get it out of his mind. He was hyperaware of the golden metal against his skin.

Kagome stirred, and looked at him.

"Koga?"

"I'm here," he assured her.

She nodded, and leaned tiredly against the wall. Koga could tell that it wasn't physical exhaustion. Kagome... was emotionally exhausted.

"Here, I got dumplings from the other village," Koga said, scooting over to her. He stroked her hair. "Eat, you look like you're going to faint."

Kagome attempted to smile, but it turned out as a grimace.

Koga studied the dark rings under her eyes, and how her hands trembled. Once or twice, he saw a teardrop threaten to fall, but Kagome wiped it away hastily.

_It's time._

Koga gave a small sigh, and took the locket out. Kagome stared wide eyed at him, as he toyed with it between his fingers.

"Where… did you…?" Kagome whispered, her eyes very round.

"Shippo gave it to me to safeguard," he replied, noting the floodgates that were about to open. "I think it's time it was returned to you."

He put it through Kagome's head, then scooted away, back facing her. He heard muted sniffles, and salt. Kagome was crying.

Koga felt stabs in his chest, and ached for Kagome's pain.

After a very long time, Kagome's sobbing died down. _Perhaps she's asleep._

Koga finished his bottle, and fingered the next bottle.

"Koga," Kagome said, hoarsely.

He turned to look at her, but she had walked over to him.

Funny, he didn't hear her approach. Perhaps the liquor was dulling his senses already.

"Why're you drinking so much, Koga? It's bad for you."

Koga saw her puffy red eyes and felt another stab.

"I can hold my liquor well, Kagome, don't worry about that."

A pause. Kagome looked into his eyes.

"You haven't answered my question, you know."

Koga felt his body tingle and a boldness, a rashness, took him. Try as he might to suppress it, he couldn't- well, that's what you got for downing six bottles.

"To distract myself, Kagome," he breathed. "From _your_ pain."

Kagome's eyes widened, and stood up quite suddenly. The golden locket swung about her neck. Koga could feel the uneasiness emitting from her.

He decided he'd push her a little further. He stood up.

"Kagome, why did the monk stop me from lending you energy just now?"

"Just… now?" Kagome asked, backing away a little.

He nodded.

"When you were healing Inuyasha."

Kagome thought for a moment, and whispered even softer.

"Because he knew that I was afraid of making you hurt because of me, Koga."

* * *

A spark lighted in his blue eyes, and the ferocity of the gaze made Kagome jump up and retreat. Koga followed, cutting the distance between them swiftly, his gaze unwavering as his eyes locked on the brown ones.

"Koga… Koga…" Kagome's voice trembled, her uneven breathing rendering her incoherent.

Did she say too much? Was Koga drunk? Kagome saw the colour in his cheeks, but the fervor in his eyes were real.

A panicked gasp escaped her as Koga pinned her arms to the wall.

Koga pressed his body against hers- Kagome could feel his heart pounding fast. She could feel his breath on her, warm, with just a hint of sake. Her heart fluttered, as she blushed at their proximity. She craved Inuyasha to stomp into the room and start hissing vulgarities as he pulled Koga off-

_Inuyasha_.

Kagome's heat just about stopped as she remembered the golden eyed hanyou watching her affectionately. The force of the memory made her heart throb. The ripped holes in her chest tore itself apart and icy daggers shot to her heart, causing salty tears to pool up in her eyes.

_Inuyasha!_

Koga pressed his lips to her forehead, fingers tracing from her wrists to her elbow and back again, leaving goosebumps in its wake.

"Koga, please… stop… Koga," Kagome whispered, trying to pull away from him. He was kissing her neck, breathing heavily. "Koga, please… Don't. I'll lose myself…"

The tears brimmed over, as an image of Inuyasha holding her similarly swam into view.

Soft, warm hands secured on her cheek, pulling her to face him.

A fraction of a second with the blue eyes, before he was kissing her.

It was not forceful, but it felt controlled, as if Koga was willing himself not to hurt her.

And… it felt nice.

Kagome's heart quickened despite herself.

Inches away, Koga was panting.

But those blue eyes were soft, somehow. Koga, who held her in a vice-like grip, holding her body down the way she wished Inuyasha would, but would never again… Koga, whom she'd always treated like her brother. Koga, whose eyes she was losing herself in. Koga, who endangered his life time and again to ensure her safety.

Koga, who had been by her whenever she needed him.

And with that, she threw herself in his embrace and found herself kissing him back.

Koga gave no reaction, only to crush her against his chest hardly, his eyes blazing.

Outside, the thunder roared.

* * *

Inuyasha took a tentative step towards the hut. Beneath the cold exterior, his heart pounded for his love. He gulped. How could he tell her now, the truth after months of hurting her, after so long of training himself to be indifferent… after leaving with Kikyo. After loving Kikyo, at the expense of Kagome? How could he tell her now, that he realized after so long that _she_ was the one who made life meaningful, who made his day, who was the focal point of his existence- the core of his being?

Inuyasha bowed his head and continued ahead slowly. How could he start? Especially since every step of his brought her further away from him? Kagome, _Kagome_, was avoiding him! The pain in him was clearly echoed in Kagome- only probably more affected. The tears she shed- Kagome tried to hide it, but it was painfully obvious.

His chest constricted painfully. He should have known that Kagome wouldn't have loved Koga. That Koga was unable to erase the memory of him from Kagome's mind. His heart swelled with hope as he thought of Kagome. Looking at everything, there was probably no chance Kagome would reject him, and turn him away like how he did her before.

Every time he looked at Kagome, the craving in his heart would be so strong, so strong that it would take all his control not to throw his arms around her, and beg her to forgive him. The only thing that refrained him from doing so was the cold, glaring stare that Koga gives him whenever he was caught gazing at Kagome. Not that it was without reason. He did deserve it.

Even then, what could he do? The instant he caught her scent, he would automatically turn around to her. He couldn't help but allow his heart to expect that Kagome would smile at him, talk to him, even just _look_ at him… Or sit him, maybe, any sign that she noticed his existence. Or felt anything. Anything. Anything but the cold treatment he is receiving right now. And every time, he would be disappointed.

And being near her was enough to completely sever his concentration and start his heart pounding ferociously. The time he took the food into the room and nearly banged into Kagome… The way Kagome's eyes darted down the second he met her eyes. The intensity of the pain in her brown eyes made his heart quiver. Yet, his harsh exterior held. Even when he struggled not to drop the food, he looked uncaring. For that, he hurt Kagome more. And he hated himself for it.

Thunder clapped above him. Inuyasha swallowed, his heart racing. Taking a deep breath, Inuyasha gently pulled aside the entrance flap. His heart stopped.

Koga and Kagome were making out. And what sapped the power from him was that she was responding to him. Inuyasha felt his throat tighten.

His legs felt like lead as he took a slow step backwards. Noiselessly, he let go of the flap. Images of Kagome ran through his mind, as he registered the full impact of the scene he had witnessed. His head buzzed with every step.

_Keh! What do I care anyway?_ Inuyasha thought, as tears cascaded down his cheeks. He made no effort to stem them.

The rain began to fall, almost as if it was matching his mood.

But no matter how, the image of Kagome and Koga could not be removed from his mind.

* * *

Koga was panting, and his heat pounded so hard he felt it would come out from his chest. It took so much control for him to hold back his strength. It was so tough stopping himself from making her his… He felt himself on fire, on fire everywhere he was touching Kagome. His body tingled, and his instincts screamed to make Kagome his mate.

It was hard resisting, especially when the girl he loved was kissing him back.

_And when he half wished to make her his woman as well._

She was so beautiful, and he loved Kagome so much his heart ached.

But his love… would never be enough.

His heart clenched as he thought of what he had to do. He would have given anything to be locked in this bubble of time forever. Kagome's soft form pressing against him, her lips on his…

_For Kagome,_ Koga thought, as a small sigh escaped his lips. He pressed his fingers gently onto the locket at her chest.

Kagome gasped, staring through him as if he were inexistent. A soft pink glow surrounded her, as a bright silver glow burst from the locket.

She slumped in his arms, spasming occasionally as the silver light enveloped her. Koga pulled her into his embrace and sat down, stroking her. His mind twisted with worry.

At long last, a silver light, tangled with the pink glow, were sucked back into the locket.

Kagome shuddered a little, and tears ran down her cheeks.

Before she fell asleep, she murmured the word Inuyasha.

* * *

**Finally put this chapter down. =) How was it? How was it? How was it? Please review, kay? =3**

**Note: The pink glow and the silver light were mentioned in the chapter 'Decisions'; the silver light is just Hanajima-san's light, and the pink glow... It is representative of Koga's love for Kagome.  
I mentioned in this chapter that Kagome's golden healing glow is the same shade as Inuyasha's eyes- Koga's glow is the same as Kagome's glow. I got this inspiration from the Deathly Hallows- kinda like Severus and Lily's Patronuses being both does.  
Hope that clears any doubt. **


	15. As it stands now

**Disclaimer: Rumiko Takahashi owns Inuyasha, Kagome, Kikyo, Shippo, Sango, Miroku, Koga, Naraku, Kagura, Kanna, Ayame, Tsubaki, Kaguya, Ginta, Hakkaku... The list goes on.**

**Thanks for the review, everyone! Currently, I estimate that there will be about 4 chapters to the end. If all goes well. Hope you are looking forward to it? Or sad about it? I have mixed feelings about it too. ^^Will be going overseas for a week if nothing goes wrong, so chapter 16 may come a bit later. I'll do my best. Now, enjoy! ^^**

**Chapter 15: As it stands now**

* * *

Koga's heart throbbed painfully, and he sighed.

Kagome's single word had managed to send him into the fiery depths of hell- she spoke Inuyasha's name with so much emotion, he thought _his_ heart would break.

_But it's worth it… for Kagome_, he thought, blinking away tears that were forming in his eyes.

The storm had reduced to a drizzle, and Koga went out of the hut. He really, really needed to get out of there. Harping on what happened… would just hurt more.

_After all, Kagome didn't love him._

Koga sighed. He felt old, really old, and he got a feeling that Kagome's memories not hurting her doesn't mean it wouldn't hurt _him_.

* * *

Shippo thought of the current situation and sighed. Had it been a month or so earlier, at the height of Kagome's anguish, it would have been welcome. Had it been a day later, that blockhead Inuyasha would have made up with Kagome, and it would have been unnecessary. _Of all times…_ Shippo sighed.

Inuyasha had returned after an hour, drenched to the skin and refusing to speak. Those golden orbs were genuinely miserable- it was almost as if Kikyo had died all over again. While they were trying to figure out what had warranted Inuyasha's behavior, Koga came in.

Shippo recalled how strong Koga's scent was and how Kagome's smell clung to every part of the demon. Koga seemed exhausted, but the sight of him sent the hanyou into a frenzy.

Before Koga could react, Inuyasha had landed a punch on Koga's jaw.

"You saw us, did you?" Koga had sighed, ducking the next punch.

"And what of it?" Inuyasha hissed. His eyes were wild.

_It took some time to pull them apart_, Shippo mused, recalling the surprise that followed: that Koga had sealed Kagome's memories.

_And we were so close to getting them together,_ Shippo thought, shaking his head.

* * *

"Thank you, Kagome-sama," Miroku said, as he got up to sit down beside Sango. Kagome nodded, as she turned over to Inuyasha.

"Stop resisting already, Inuyasha. Let me see your wound."

Inuyasha reluctantly took off his shirt, and Kagome gasped.

"Kageromaru got you bad," Kagome murmured, shaking her head. "Lie down. It may be some time."

Inuyasha flushed a little as Kagome laid her hand on his wound. He fidgeted as the gold light burst forth.

They had met Naraku's fourth and fifth detachments, Kageromaru and Juromaru. After a serious fight (Kagome's absorption ability being of no use) and some casualties, they had destroyed the duo. But Koga and Inuyasha got very worked up that Kageromaru had almost got her.

Koga's reaction she could get- hadn't he been caring for her for some time? But Inuyasha's… Kagome wondered, deep in thought. _How come?_

Maybe after Kikyo died, he wouldn't live with seeing another woman die, Kagome concluded eventually. She had a feeling she was forgetting something… _but what?_

Kagome looked up to see Koga staring at her.

"Enough energy, Kagome?"

Kagome nodded. "Your leg okay?"

"Yeah."

As Koga was going to turn his back to her, Kagome said, "By the way, Koga… When you kissed me that night… you were just drunk, right?"

Koga froze. Kagome could see the side of his face spasm, as he forced a smile.

"Yeah," Koga replied, his tone a bit off. "Sorry 'bout that, Kagome."

Kagome watched as he sat down to sleep some distance away. It was nightfall, and apart from the cicadas and everyone's gentle breathing, it was silent.

Kagome thought back to the past few days.

In the morning after Goshinki, she had awaken feeling extremely exhilarated. It felt as if she had broken free of something hurtful… but she couldn't remember any particular instance that made her down. The only thing that came to mind was stress of the tests, and Souta's discovery that Kyle had been sneaking around the shrine.

"He seems as though he was looking for something, and once he asked Jii-chan if we sold bows and arrows," Souta had told her, looking extremely troubled. Kagome knew that Kyle had suspicions about her 'gift' in archery.

Kagome shook her head. That wasn't important now. She searched her memory further, but couldn't find anything. But the lingering sensation… that she'd forgotten something.

Also, was it her imagination or has everyone been eyeing her strangely?

_Particularly… Inuyasha._

Kagome looked down at the hanyou. His eyes were closed and face devoid of expression.

She trailed her fingers around his abdomen absentmindedly, wondering what it was that gnawed at her from the back of her mind. _I'm sure it has something to do with him…_

Kagome gasped as a warm hand closed in on her fingers. Inuyasha was staring at her unwaveringly, his hand enveloped around hers.

She blushed, and stammered, "I thought you were asleep."

"I was," Inuyasha said, looking into her eyes intently. Kagome saw some kind of fervor alit in his eyes, and flushed heavily.

After a moment of unbroken eye contact, something like disappointment washed over his features. He let go of her, and left.

_What was that about?_ Kagome wondered.

* * *

Inuyasha jumped into the well, feeling a tug wrench at his heart as he remembered Kagome's smile as she instructed him to fetch her after five days.

"I bet you prefer ninja food to the fishes Inuyasha burnt, Shippo-chan," she had said, smiling brilliantly at him, causing the retort to die on his lips.

Inuyasha pulled open the doors of the well-house, and allowed the familiar scents of Kagome's world to flood him. _I haven't been here for so long…_ he thought, stepping tentatively into the sunlight.

_So many things have passed…_

His mind went back to the morning Kagome awoke from her memory sealing. He had been outside the hut, but his ears picked up on the carefree, cheerful tone of Kagome's voice. All the stress and tension had gone from it, and as if entranced, Inuyasha had found himself walking towards its source.

_The room turned silent upon his entrance. Kagome, with a shadow of her smile, froze and stared at him. Koga fixed his eyes on Kagome, which annoyed him._

"_Anything the matter?" he snapped, as Miroku and the others recovered themselves._

"_Yeah," Kagome had replied, frowning at him. "_Who're you_?"_

_His heart had literally stopped when he heard her. Ice crept into his veins, his heat, suffocating him._

He remembered his horror._ She forgot him? She forgot him? All those times, all those moments, all the love he showed and all the love she had for him? _She forgot?_ Man, he was going to throttle Koga._

If only I told her earlier_, he had thought, as pain shot through his chest. _Now she's lost to me. She actually forgot me!

_Koga looked, bemused, between Kagome and Inuyasha, while the rest of the gang were wearing masks of pure horror._

_He was so going to throttle Koga._

_Kagome giggled, and Inuyasha stared at her. _

"_Just kidding, Inuyasha. You should have seen your face!" Kagome said, smiling. Everyone relaxed. "Only Koga appreciated the joke," she added, smiling at the wolf._

The wave of jealousy swept over him again as he remembered.

"_Seriously, Kagome," Koga said. "Who's this dog?"_

_Kagome had frowned, and replied, "Inuyasha, of course. We're hunting down Naraku."_

"_More recently?" Koga prompted._

_Kagome looked puzzled, and Inuyasha held his breath._

"_He left for Kikyo? Is that what you are referring to?" she asked, without a change of tone or expression._

_Inuyasha, who had been feeling relieved, froze._

"_You don't blame me, do you? Kagome?" Inuyasha had asked slowly._

"_Blame you for going after your beloved?" Kagome responded. "Am I that unreasonable?"_

_Inuyasha slumped against the wall, feeling weak._

_On one hand, Kagome did not forget him. On the other hand, she didn't love him anymore. His heart felt crushed. _Kagome doesn't love me.

"… _the two times Inuyasha turned demon, d'you remember them?" Shippo persisted. "How did he change back?"_

"_The one with Goshinki, I said _osuwari_," Kagome said. Inuyasha slammed to the floor. _What the hell_._

"_Sorry, Inuyasha! And the one before that, at Kaguya's castle… Inuyasha's human self was trapped in a mirror…" Kagome continued. Then, she frowned. "How _did_ he turn human?"_

_Another blow._

Inuyasha sighed.

And after the fight with Naraku's detachments… When she was healing him, she had trailed her fingers across his abdomen. His heart started pounding furiously, but as he impulsively grabbed her hand, Kagome had made no response.

She must really have forgotten him, her love for him.

He felt his love for Kagome rear up strongly, and the gut wrenching sensation when he knew that Kagome forgot him. Inuyasha looked up in exasperation, seeing Goshinboku's branches sway gently in the breeze.

_Kagome!_

"Inuyasha nii-chan?"

Inuyasha looked down slowly to see the eager, surprised face of Souta.

"I thought you'd never come!" he said, smiling, as he led Inuyasha into the house. "Nee-chan was so quiet and reserved- did you two have a gigantic quarrel or something?"

Feeling a lump in his throat, Inuyasha nodded.

"Wait in the house, I'll get mum," Souta gushed, racing outside before Inuyasha could get a word out.

Inuyasha shook his head, and went up the stairs to Kagome's bedroom.

_It smells so strongly of her,_ Inuyasha thought, drinking in the scent hungrily. His heart pounded.

He moved to the table Kagome had, and sat in her chair.

_Kagome…_

Suddenly, something caught his eye. A half opened diary, shoved into a corner of the desk. Inuyasha unearthed it, and stared.

He was looking at a sketch of himself, and, he had to hand it to her, Kagome depicted him quite accurately. Almost.

In the sketch, he was looking away from Kagome coldly, a broken heart between them.

_Kagome must have drawn this when he left… What were her feelings when she drew this?_ Inuyasha wondered.

He felt as if his heart was torn apart, and put away the diary hastily.

_I'll make it up to you, Kagome,_ Inuyasha thought. _But first, I'll make you remember me._

_I can, and I will. _


	16. One sided

**Disclaimer: .ihsakaT okimuR ot sgnignoleb ahsayunI. No matter how you say this, backwards, forwards... Inuyasha belongs to Rumiko Takahashi.**

**I'M SORRY FOR TAKING SO LONG TO UPDATE! I honestly got the outline of the chapter drafted out, but I had to rewrite this chapter at least once over because it seemed too awkward. I hope this final product is agreeable to everyone. Thanks for staying with Protected Pain, and do review! (I'll do my best to update quickly- approximately three more chapters to go!)**

**Chapter 16: One sided.**

* * *

Akira Tomika gazed around his shrine fondly. He had to admit that all these years, he had done a good job of maintaining the shrine. By himself, no less. He showed his last visitors out with a wrinkled smile, a couple of high school students praying for good results. He smiled reminiscently at the old times, when _he_ was a teenager- a very long time ago indeed.

As Akira bent down to pour himself tea, he felt every year of his old age- his muscles had deteriorated, his back ached constantly, and if you looked carefully his hands were beginning to tremble. Akira sighed, wishing that he had an heir to continue the work after he died. But his beloved wife died of cancer before they had a child of their own- he never remarried.

He touched the framed picture of his wife affectionately.

His friends used to persuade him to remarry, saying that it was lonely to be alone in old age. But he would shake his head at them and reply, "One day I'll be with Ren again. That's good enough for me."

Akira put down his teacup and stretched, hearing his joints pop. He was determined to clear the storeroom today. Anyhow, wasn't the cure to loneliness work? He smiled again, and set off to the storeroom.

After clearing and reshelving for half an hour, Akira discovered an ancient box. Its seal was yellow and brittle.

Akira knew what it was, but found that he had trouble believing it. His father had told him that it was a demon his ancestor sealed and overcame centuries back… He tried to recall the story behind it, as he stroked the package absentmindedly.

There was a scratching sound, and Akira woke from his reverie to see the seal torn.

_I knew I should have cut those nails_, he thought sadly, as he got up to find other seals. Who knew, maybe the story was true- and a youkai was really sealed in there? He shook his head. After so long, you didn't know if the stories were true or not. But there was always a possibility…

Akira had his back turned to the box. He didn't hear as the box creaked open quietly. He didn't see as a white, translucent creature rose, the first time in four centuries.

The next thing he knew, a heavy mass was surrounding him. He felt his energy drain, and his mind go foggy. The breath in his lungs was being pushed out, and he slumped to the floor.

_It was true after all_, Akira thought tiredly. He tried to resist, but he had no strength left. He sighed.

_Maybe this is how it feels to die._

_Wait for me, Ren._

* * *

Kagome lowered herself into the refreshing warm water of the bathtub and gave a sigh of satisfaction. Her arms ached from the long gym lesson earlier that morning, but the bath was beginning to relax her.

To be honest, it was not only her muscles which were feeling tense- Kagome herself was feeling quite so. She shook her head, bidding reign over her imagination.

_That's just impossible,_ Kagome thought, sighing. _It's just because Mum…_

She stared into the ceiling as she recalled the possibility that her mother considered, when they were at the supermarket.

"_Kagome-chan, you look happier today," her mother commented, smiling._

_Kagome nodded. "I feel better, but I'm not sure why…"_

"_Maybe it's because Inuyasha-kun is here?" her mother suggested after a pause._

"_He's just a friend," Kagome said, shaking her head as she picked up the instant ramen from the shelf. "Just a friend, Mom," she repeated, only to feel a repeat of a strange twinge in her chest._

"_But I think Inuyasha-kun likes you, Kagome," her mother said seriously, as Kagome gawked at her. "Don't you?"_

_Kagome had shaken her head fiercely and told her about Kikyo and Inuyasha. Her mother listened attentively with raised eyebrows, and seemed surprised at Kagome's nonchalance. _

"_So how can he like me?" Kagome concluded rhetorically._

_Kagome's mother pondered that. Eventually, she said, "But there's just something in his eyes… And yours, actually."_

_Impossible_, Kagome repeated in her mind. _Inuyasha loved Kikyo. Inuyasha loved Kikyo. There was no way…_

Yet, some part of her whispered to her heart that Inuyasha liked her. Kagome looked down at the golden locket (that she never seemed able to remove) and wondered how she felt about that likelihood.

To be frank to herself, she just felt incredulity- no partiality for the hanyou nor the reverse- but somewhere deep down in her… seemed to shout at her otherwise. The main question now: why?

She didn't find an answer.

_God, it's almost as if I have split personality…_

Kagome remembered the look in Inuyasha's eyes at dinner, and felt her mother's suggestion fix more firmly in her mind than before.

Souta had left for a party, and both Jii-chan and Mom had left to see an Akira Tomika-san in hospital.

"_An Akira Tomika-san was found unconscious and barely breathing at Deep Forest shrine earlier today. He has been sent to the intensive care unit of Tokyo hospital. Doctors cannot confirm that it is a medical reason, and would like to urge any relations of Tomika-san to step forward. Meanwhile, we would like to advise viewers to…"_

"_Oh my gosh, that's Akii!" Kagome's grandfather had exclaimed. Kagome saw Inuyasha jump at the sudden outburst and bit back a smile._

"_Akira Tomika-san?" her mother asked, looking out from the kitchen. "Your ex-classmate, Dad?"_

"_Indeed," he replied, as he bounded up to get a coat with unusual speed. "The one who went to your parents' wedding," he answered, seeing Souta's confused face. "I must visit him right away. Poor guy has been lonely since his wife died…"_

Kagome's mother had accompanied him… leaving her alone with Inuyasha.

She fixed Inuyasha fish and chips, something she learnt how to make in econs. Kagome betted that Inuyasha would love it, and she was right. It was almost comical to see his expression when he took the first bite- the hanyou was obviously awed that something as commonplace as fishes could be made into such a nice dish. _Who knew?_ Kagome thought with a smile, _perhaps fish and chips would overtake instant ramen in the list of Inuyasha's favourite foods._

Kagome had laughed at Inuyasha for his eating style. _The utensils were wasted on him,_ Kagome decided. He had totally picked up the fillet with his bare hands and stuffed it into his mouth. The mess was _remarkable._

"Like you're one to talk," Inuyasha had muttered, picking up a napkin to wipe away a spot of cream on her cheek.

Her face tingled- then, as well as just remembering how his amber eyes looked.

_Hesitant. Eager. Longing. A lot of longing._

She swallowed, and bid herself not to remember that.

Just hormones- nothing concrete. She had nothing to worry about.

_Though… was it her imagination, or did Inuyasha's fingers linger on her for an exceptionally long time?_

Kagome looked at the clock mounted on the wall of the bathroom. She had been in there for quite some time indeed.

Kagome pulled her dripping self out of the bathtub.

_Perhaps I've hidden in here long enough._ She shuddered at the awkwardness that probably awaited her outside.

_Coward_, Kagome chided herself, and looked around for the long towel. She stared around the bathroom, once, twice, thrice… Before it sunk in.

_Where's the towel?_

* * *

Inuyasha sat on the bed, drinking in Kagome's scent. It was out of order, totally out of order just now.

Those chocolate brown eyes of hers would drown him someday. Not that he had an issue with that- he loved her. He loved Kagome.

_Kagome…_

With his hand on her cheek and Kagome looking earnestly at him, he had been tempted, sorely tempted to pull her face to his, to feel her in his arms…

But no.

In a way, he was thankful that her eyes had turned away resolutely at the critical moment. It was for the better good- the time wasn't ripe yet. Kagome couldn't remember his affections for her- how would she view she view his behavior? Would she shun his inexplicable behavior and cling to Koga? Would she despise him, thinking that he wanted her to fill Kikyo's void? Would she think him dangerous, unable to control himself? Inuyasha considered kissing her, repeating that day at Kaguya's castle- but would awaken her memories? Or would she think that he wanted to take advantage of her?

Inuyasha sighed. This was harder than he'd thought.

His ponderings were broken by Kagome's voice, coming from the bathroom opposite.

"Um… Inuyasha?" she called, hesitatingly.

"I'm here."

"Uh… Could you get me a towel from the cupboard, please-?"

Inuyasha startled. Blushing from his sudden burst of imagination, he managed a tiny "Keh". He found the said item, and walked to the bathroom. Inuyasha hesitated, then knocked.

"Turn your back," Kagome instructed. Inuyasha blushed, if possible, even redder.

"I'm not Miroku, you know," he grumbled.

He felt Kagome pull the towel free from his hands. "Too bad," she murmured. "And thanks."

Inuyasha took it as a dismissal and retreated to Kagome's room. He flopped down to her bed and closed his eyes. He took deep breaths, trying to steady his pounding heart.

_He so wasn't going to look like a perverted creep in front of Kagome._

Inuyasha's sensitive ears picked up the chirping of the cicadas from outside. Gradually, his breathing slowed and the heat on his face receded. Inuyasha let out a small yawn.

Kagome came in soon after, making his heart rate pick up again. Inuyasha rolled over to hide his face against the wall and pretended to sleep. But he couldn't- Kagome's scent assaulted him anew.

He heard Kagome sit at the table and the sound of page turning. That was occasionally punctured by pencil scratching paper, and in the background, Kagome's gentle breathing. Sometime later, Inuyasha heard Souta returning home.

Making Kagome remember him was harder than he thought. But he wouldn't give up. No matter how long it took. One day, Kagome would return to his side, forever. He wanted to wake up every morning to see her beside him, go to sleep every night with her in his arms. He wanted them to be together again, even if it was at the cost of being sat, slapped, or yelled at for leaving her- he'd take it all- but just that Kagome would love him again.

And Inuyasha would never ever ever let her go again. He'd never let Kagome down again.

She would be his, his alone.

Kagome yawned and switched off the lights. She slid herself carefully into bed beside him, albeit leaving a significant gap in between them. Inuyasha's hear t pounded so loudly, he reckoned Kagome's human ears could pick it up.

After awhile, Kagome fell asleep. Inuyasha had a mad urge to put his arms around her, but resisted at the last moment. If her mother were to find them in such a position…

He grimaced. Or worse, if Kagome woke up and sat him until he fell through the floor.

Kagome was so close, so close. Within his reach… yet so far.

But one day, in the near future…

He and Kagome would be together again.

* * *

**I kinda get the feeling that Inuyasha is too Miroku-like and... Do I make him sound possessive? T_T Please give me feedback, and how you like (or don't like) this chapter... THANK YOU.**


	17. The last Mienai

**Disclaimer: The various characters belong to their own mangakhas! (did i spell it wrongly? Hm...)**

**This chapter is comparatively longer- the content I needed to fit in here was quite massive. Based on my story outline, Protected Pain will end at chapter 20. Or maybe 19... We'll see how it goes. ^^ Thanks for all the reviews, and please enjoy! =)**

**Chapter 17: The last _Mienai_**

* * *

The gentle rays of the sun shone into Kagome's room. Gradually, sleep was chased from Inuyasha, stupor giving way to awareness. Without opening his eyes, he remembered that he fell asleep the night before with Kagome beside him. Inuyasha felt something within his arms, and it was almost leaning into his chest. Something… _soft_.

The sudden realization that the _something_ could actually be _someone_, and _someone_ would be, in all likelihood, _Kagome_, made Inuyasha wide awake.

Inuyasha ventured to open his eyes.

Sure enough, there was Kagome. In the course of sleeping, she had found her way to his bosom- or his arms found their way around her.

Looking down at what was so beloved to him, he felt his chest expand and his heart swell with affection. He loved her so painfully much. _Damn_, he thought. _I'd stay in this hectic world just to be with you, Kagome. Life would be meaningless without her. _

After gazing at Kagome for half an hour, Inuyasha felt all the necessity of getting out of bed. By his estimates, her "alarm clock" was due to ring soon, and he could hear the rest of the house awake and about. Reluctantly, he withdrew his hands from around Kagome, careful not to rouse her. He fancied that Kagome stirred- but from further inspection he was convinced otherwise.

_What he would give to stay like that for all time…_

As he walked down to breakfast, Inuyasha felt the morning news.

"_Four teenage boys have been found earlier today unconscious outside Evergreen Park. Both the police department and the hospital have declined interviews. However, unnamed sources have revealed to Tokyo News that the boys are in the same condition as Akira Tomika-san, with the same lack of symptoms…"_

* * *

"Unnamed sources," grumbled Inspector Meguire to his wife, as he sipped his coffee. "Brilliant, just brilliant."

His wife stared in concern at the television, her eyebrows furrowing together.

"Lack of symptoms?" she murmured, looking up at her husband.

Meguire sighed and said, "Akira Tomika-san, being elderly as he is, may have a reason to drop unconscious. Low blood pressure, stroke, stuff like that. But four teenagers, at the same time…" he shook his head.

"Could they have been mugged?" his wife suggested. "They were found at 4am, right? It's far too late to be safely outdoors…"

Meguire grimaced to his wife.

"Not likely. Unless they were _all_ drugged- the boys didn't have a single mark or bruise on their body. Even so," he sighed. "Their wallets were intact. No cash appears to have been stolen."

His wife looked out of the window, watching birds fly pass.

The universe was so large, so many things unexplained… The paranormal, for starters. People who claim to see things from the other side… Also, those legends of demons and magical power… It seemed so fanciful, so impossible, in a civilized, modern, practical society. Yet, science could only explain so much. Knowledge is justified true belief, and knowledge is limited.

_Fear was incomplete knowledge._

"Has any of them awoken?" she asked her husband. "Perhaps they could shed some light…"

Meguire picked up his hat and shrugged. "I'll check it out when I reach the station. Bye, dear."

They exchanged a kiss, and Meguire left.

* * *

Kagome listened to her grandfather speak with increasing worry. A demon! Let loose in modern Japan! Beside her, Inuyasha twitched, reflecting her own unease.

Her grandfather had visited Akira Tomika-san in hospital, and managed to learn the story of what happened during the brief period he was lucid. Legend said that the bow contained an energy draining youkai, which Tomika-san's ancestors had sealed.

Its species were one of the most hard to conquer in the youkai world. During the centuries that demons and humans lived in harmony, that species of demon went around keeping a balance between the two races. The deformed or the weak of both races were destroyed by these demons, ensuring that the next generation would be healthy. These demons ensured balance in the ecosystem.

They were such an important role that, when demons or humans had ailing family members would utter a prayer that these demons would cut short their suffering. Because these demons absorbed energy not for substance of themselves, but to keep a balance in nature. They would just swoop on their victim and pull the energy from them, without mauling the body or causing bodily pain. Yet because of this energy absorption ability, they became formidable creatures. Their self defence was flawless, and their adaptation to a translucent, almost invisible state made them safe from other creatures. As time passed, the other creatures accepted the necessity of these demons.

The humans called them the _Mienai_, literally, the Unseen.

However, as time progressed, humans began to drive demons from their midst. They had highly developed brains, which many youkai species did not- common insect demons were the first to go, and only those highly intelligent species survived. Those that were really the heart of youkai- dragons, and youkai which were like humans in their mental capabilities.

The onslaught was gradual but determined. What would be left would be demons with superior bloodlines; the wolf, the dog, the dragons amongst others. The concept had been highly foreign to these _Mienai_, but as time went by they realized that time of humans coexisting with demons were coming to a close- at the very end, it was inevitable for the dying out of demons. Most of the _Mienai_ had come to this understanding, and allowed themselves to be killed or die.

"However, this particular demon could not come to terms with what was happening despite what the rest of its species thought. It began to retaliate in vengeance, trying for a twisted balance which would never return to how it was before. It attacked human villages, hurting as many as it could. In one of its rampages, Akii-san's ancestor risked his life to seal the demon, He succeeded, but the effect crippled him forever," Jii-chan said, looking gravely between Inuyasha and Kagome. "Such is a force we're up against."

Inuyasha let out a soft sigh, and added, "The _Mienai_ has claimed five people already, and there's no stopping him from hurting more. Just one thing- why hasn't anyone died?"

"Maybe Akii-san's ancestor did a lasting damage, or perhaps it has yet to collect enough energy to be truly effective. Either way, it must be put to stop at once."

Inuyasha nodded. "One last thing- where's Evergreen Park?"

"Just wait for me while I get my bow-"

"No!"

Kagome looked up at the silver haired man before her incredulously. Inuyasha's jaw was set in a tight line, his manner unyielding, determined.

"You are not going to risk your life over a mere demon, Kagome. I can handle it."

Kagome frowned at him. "Akira Tomika-san's ancestor was a human," she informed him coldly. "And I've held my own against demons before."

Inuyasha shot her a look. _Worry. Exasperation. Unwillingness. And- something else._

"Think about it. A demon trying to retain the balance between youkai and human," he said, looking deep into her eyes. "We can't give it more reason to-"

He stuttered.

"You_- if you're gone, how do we get the Shikon no Tama?"_

Kagome met his gaze with unwavering will of her own. Lots of rebuttals rose to her mind- _that Mienai can take on fully grown youkai! Fighting alone is suicidal! The youkai absorbs energy- it is a formidable enemy no matter youkai, hanyou, human-!_

"I just don't want to see someone close to me die again," Inuyasha murmured to Kagome in an undertone. "Now, just let me get you to school, alright? You're running late."

The two of them barely spoke a word throughout the journey. On Kagome's part, she bit her rebuttals back. Despite her worry for Inuyasha, she realized that she wouldn't win this argument. Inuyasha must have been reproaching himself over Kikyo's death again, Kagome thought, as she waved back to Inuyasha before she walked into the school building.

Perhaps… that's why Inuyasha clung to her last night.

Kikyo must have came to his dreams the night before.

* * *

Inuyasha couldn't shake off the uncomfortable feeling plaguing him.

That look in Kagome's eyes… looked almost pitying.

How on earth was he going to awaken her memories? Inuyasha couldn't just pretend that they were new acquaintances and forget all the past, forget his love for her, forget her love of him. _They were meant to be together._

Inuyasha huffed and leapt over another building, landing in front of Evergreen Park. As he landed, he patted the two sutras to check that they were still intact. Miroku had passed it to him as he went back to consult Kaede on tackling _Mienai_s.

About the _Mienai_ youkai, Kaede had no experience exterminating them- that made sense however, being at least a century too early.

"_The main thing perhaps is that ye must not let it come into contact with you," Kaede told him. "They cannot drain ye strength from a distance. But once it touches you, there's probably no chance…"_

Inuyasha put his nose in the sky, catching the scent of the youkai. He began to sprint, ignoring a nagging feeling in his gut.

At some point in time, his thoughts returned to Kagome.

It was nice having some one on one time alone with Kagome, not having to share her with the gang (Shippo in particular), postponing the search for Naraku to a later time.

Returning to her house, her room, so saturated with Kagome's scent- the scent he'd learnt to love so long ago, which assaulted his senses over and again…. It was wonderful. _What he would give to be able to stay alongside her for the rest of his life! _

Yet though it was on the tip of his tongue this morning, he couldn't tell Kagome "Because I love you- I can't bear to see you hurt" to save his life. His throat had dried just considering telling her that, in so many words.

Inuyasha sighed. Usually, Kagome seemed to understand his actions, behavior and intent: that he loved her. But after the sealing, Kagome seemed oblvious to it all.

_And no wonder. If she didn't know, she couldn't love him back. If she didn't love him, she wouldn't get hurt. _

Inuyasha's heart felt heavier all of a sudden. He dismissed the (now very real) likelihood of Kagome's memories never being reawakened, and tried to be optimistic.

At least, now, Inuyasha was more thankful for what he had. Perhaps somewhere in his mind, he had taken for granted her place alongside him. That she'd always love him like he loved her.

_And he'd destroyed that by himself, by his own two hands._

Really, there was no one to blame but himself. Not Koga, not anyone else. Just himself.

It could have turned out quite differently- Koga may have taken Kagome for himself. Or Kagome could have returned to her time for good, or something…

Yet now he had Kagome. Still. There was still a glimmer of hope, for, deep down, she loved him.

_Kagome still loved him._

Suddenly, Inuyasha screeched to a halt. He looked around, feeling his heart in his throat.

_No way._

He was in familiar territory now; he could actually smell his scent with Kagome's if he sniffed closely.

_This was the way they took this morning._

Feeling sick, he followed the demon's scent, running with more urgency now.

_Please… No…_

Kagome's face swam into mind as he screeched to a halt again. His legs felt like lead.

_He was back at the gate of Kagome's school.

* * *

_

The demon lurked in the shade of the trees and waited. It could sense the hyped up energy swirling nearby, and began to get very excited over the next target. The energy in the bodies surrounding it were delicious. Simply _ravishing._

A cloud moved above him, throwing some of the sunlight onto him. The _Mienai_ inspected its body, feeling a grim satisfaction at its now transparent body. All _Mienai_ were by nature translucent- then again, none of its species had absorbed as much energy as he in such a short span of time. _Five bodies…_

It watched as a human male drew his bow and aimed at the target nearby. The youkai had determined the next human to approach this thicket would fall victim to it.

Such _energetic_ humans…

A girl came up to the guy and pecked him on the cheek. In a flash, the male flushed, and the _Mienai_ felt his energy soar- euphoria in its most undiluted form.

The _Mienai_ knew that it had to be this male. All the surroundings couldn't compare…

The male missed the target board by a lot, and came ambling over in embarrassment.

_Just a little further, a little further…_

The male stepped into attacking range, and the youkai pounced. It felt a magical presence nearby, but it ignored the feeling. The prey was too good to miss.

The human's eyes widened in shock and struggled a bit. The _Mienai_ felt a sort of savage satisfaction as the human's energy flowed into it.

_Humans don't deserve to walk this land.

* * *

_

Kagome drew the bow, feeling the muscles in her arms tighten. She stared at the target board, mentally blocking out every other sound surrounding her. She had to concentrate carefully, or the purifying energy may very well trail from her arrow. Suspicious of her as Kyle was, she had to leave no reason for him to uncover her secret.

Yet, perhaps she didn't need to worry about the moment. Kyle and Eri were using the combined archery class to catch up with each other- i.e. flirt. Hojou and the others were someplace else, not exactly in close proximity to her. It was as if they didn't want to be overheard by her.

Just as she was about to release the arrow, she saw out of the side of her eyes that Kyle had suddenly dropped to the ground, his limbs flailing in the air. Kagome felt an odd jolt in her gut, and lowered her bow a little.

_Don't tell me-_

Kagome shut her eyes, concentrating fiercely on the energy of the life surrounding her. For one trying moment, she thought it was to no avail- but the next moment, golden spots of light popped into the blackness of her eyelids.

Kyle's spark was quickly extinguishing, while another, much more powerful spark was growing.

_The Mienai_.

Kagome released the arrow, firing at it, not caring whether the people rushing to get help for Kyle noticed or not.

She had also sensed Inuyasha coming through the wood- that would force the demon out into the open.

_In the end, no matter his insistence, I'd be exterminating the youkai with him._

Kagome grabbed a bunch of arrows and chased after the youkai. _I can't stand around- my classmates are in danger! People who didn't know, people of my world…_

In seconds, Inuyasha was beside her. She could see from his eyes that he was begging her to keep away, but Kagome shook her head fiercely. In exasperation, he pulled out a sutra and handed it to her. Then, scooping her onto his back, he began to run.

Kagome meanwhile drew the bow and fired an arrow, attached to Miroku's sutra, behind her. Once the sutra touched ground, a colourless barrier was erected, effectively separating them from her classmates.

"What the hell, Kagome!" Inuyasha complained, Kagome felt a jolt in her chest, and the faintly familiar image of Inuyasha pulling his face out of the dirt came to mind, along with an overwhelming surge of relief. Her hands tingled on Inuyasha's back, somehow feeling as though she needed to grab him close… And never let go.

But that didn't make sense.

"It's meant to keep the _Mienai_ off you!"

"I have my own barriers, thank you very much," Kagome said, rolling his eyes at him, jumping off as he stopped. Inuyasha sighed and whipped out Tessaiga.

"_Kaze no Kizu!"_

Inuyasha felt the Wind Scar come into contact with the demon. Just as he was about to deliver the deadly blow, the wind direction suddenly changed.

All of a sudden, they were upwind. And he couldn't smell the demon.

A rush of fear threatened to overwhelm Inuyasha, as he grabbed Kagome close to him. It was just like the other time- the enemy was out of sight. And he could feel it coming into place- déjà vu, and an almost certain feeling about the impending doom. He couldn't let it happen again. Not the one he loved from the bottom of his heart. He couldn't let go of her-

"Behind you, Inuyasha!" Kagome warned, pulling her hand out of his grip to draw an arrow.

Inuyasha gulped, before reluctantly releasing Kagome's hand. Keeping close to her, he whipped out Tessaiga and sent another Wind Scar before him, before Kagome's shriek of alarm froze his blood in his veins.

Horrified, he turned to see Kagome erect a barrier just in time to fend off the _Mienai_. _He just knew it would happen. _

"Inuyasha, Wind Scar!" she cried, as her face screwed up in concentration to keep the youkai off her.

"I can't! I'll hurt you!" he choked back as bile rose in his throat at the idea of Kagome being torn apart by him. If it took so much to fend off the _Mienai_, Kagome stood no chance against his Wind Scar. She wasn't even trained in barriers, for goodness sake.

There was just one thing to do.

Inuyasha threw the sutra Miroku handed him to the ground and ran to pull the demon off Kagome's barrier with his bare hands.

The demon turned on him and Inuyasha felt the energy leave his body.

* * *

Kagome felt her face blanch as a deep-set horror threatened to engulf her. She felt that she would scream, but she couldn't. _No! Inuyasha!_

She had no time to consider why she felt those feelings. All she knew was that if he died, she would cease to exist also.

Shakily, Kagome drew an arrow, and fired it at the demon.

She knew that it hit.

Without thinking, Kagome ran up to the demon, which was still struggling to absorb Inuyasha's strength. She placed her hand on its warm and jelly like body. Focusing like she never did before, she engaged the _Mienai_ in a tug of war for the other's energy. Although the demon was injured from her arrow, Kagome could feel her strength being drained gradually.

Beside her, Inuyasha slashed at the demon.

This was the break Kagome needed. As the pain registered in the _Mienai's_ mind, its mental iron-like defence broke. Kagome drained much of its energy suddenly. Transforming that strength into purifying energy, Kagome vanquished the demon.

It took a while for it to sink in.

"Is it gone?" Kagome whispered, breaking the silence.

"Utterly," came Inuyasha's reply, as he looked at her in amazement.

Kagome nodded weakly, and her legs wobbled. Her nerves were at breaking point, having Inuyasha face possible destruction for such an extended period of time. As she took some breaths to calm herself, she noticed again the strange need from deep inside her heart. The need to know that Inuyasha was alive, safe… Her body craved, but her mind held her back with a simple, effective question: why?

Before she could consider it however, Inuyasha's arms came around her, embracing her tightly. Kagome's heart quickened, and she flushed despite herself.

_The craving only grew._

After several moments, Inuyasha whispered, "Thank heavens you're alive, Kagome," with so much emotion that she thought his voice would break. _It felt so warm, so nice in his arms, _Kagome realized. _I feel almost as it… I belong here._ She took a deep breath, nuzzling herself deeper into Inuyasha's clothes. She seemed to sigh a sigh of satisfaction from her heart, as Inuyasha clutched her even closer and with more energy than before. Kagome couldn't wonder about why she felt those feelings now- she wanted to enjoy the moment.

_Alone… with Inuyasha._

It felt like a considerable period had passed, when Inuyasha finally loosened his hold on her. Kagome released him hesitantly, looking up at him to try to fathom his thoughts.

_Something about him told her that it was not Kikyo he was embracing, but her. Kagome._

Inuyasha stared intensely back at her, a fervoured look so strong that Kagome flushed.

"I've got to go," Kagome whispered, racing back towards class. Inuyasha didn't follow- a fact that Kagome was thankful for: she truly didn't know how to face him right now.

After destroying Miroku's barrier, Kagome slipped into the anxious crowd around Kyle. She heard someone whisper anxiously that it had been a quarter of an hour, and the teachers had called an ambulance. Kagome crept closer towards the front, moving to be beside Kyle and Eri. Eri was wailing for Kyle to awake, shaking him and pinching him. Kagome knelt down and pretended to rouse him like Eri was; though she was in fact restoring energy to his body.

While the energy flowed to Kyle, Kagome took the moments to consider how come she felt as though she loved him. For it was love, definitely. Love that made her want Inuyasha so badly- and love was the only explanation for Inuyasha's behavior. Not just this once. Her mother had been right. On both occasions- just that Kagome didn't know how she could have loved Inuyasha.

Even right now, once away from Inuyasha… she could convince herself that she didn't love him.

With one hand, Kagome went to touch the golden locket around her neck. Usually, it felt really cold… But now… It was as though the imaginary ice surrounding it… was beginning to melt.

What a fanciful idea.

Kagome shook away the thought and continued shaking Kyle absentmindedly, only looking worried. He was going to be out of danger shortly, Kagome calculated. There was enough energy for him to stir…

Kyle's eyes snapped open so fast that Kagome jumped, pulling her hand away hastily. Kyle locked eyes with Kagome, and she instantly wondered how much he knew. Kyle knew that the excuse she gave for her talent in archery was a fluke, and that lesson she fired the arrow back at him he may have noticed the faintly pink trail. He probably also checked out her lies about why she didn't come for school. When the _Mienai_ was on him, the arrow she fired at the youkai was pink too, that she was sure. Even if he didn't know what he was attacked by, it was too much to hope that Kyle hadn't noticed her filling him with energy.

Kagome felt the gravity of the situation sink in, and her stomach churned. She backed away.

Because those eyes were accusing. She could see that Kyle had come to a realization, a shocking one.

_The results of all those suspicions were out._

"Kyle! Kyle! God, say something!" Eri shrieked, breaking the spell. Kyle turned to look at her, as Kagome began to back away faster. "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine," Kyle replied hoarsely, as the two classes breathed a collective sigh of relief.

_No, it wasn't fine._

Kyle knew her secret, and now the fate of her two lives rested in his hands.

_No, it wasn't fine at all._

_In fact, this was totally screwed._

* * *

**Yay! How's this to sum up the chapter? ^^ Showdown coming up, next chapter! Please review, and maybe let me know what you guess will happen- thanks very much for reading Protected Pain! =)**


	18. A single Barrier

**Disclaimer: Rumiko Takahashi would have a better reason to post a new chapter late than I do.**

**I am so sorry, all, for taking this long to post chapter 18! More A/N at the bottom, now...**

**Chapter 18: A single Barrier**

* * *

"Hey," he said, slipping into the seat beside Eri at their usual lunch table. Immediately, there were lots of enquiries after him, and he acknowledged with a nod all of them. He saw an astonished look on Higurashi's face, and gave a small smile in reply.

'_Bet she counted on me to stay in the hospital,_ he thought, as he turned away to look at Eri beside him. Kyle watched her affectionately as she attempted to juggle the use of her mouth between eating and repeating how anxious she was when Kyle had been unconscious.

"I got so hysteric! Nothing I did seemed to help!" Eri whined, mock punching him. The others chuckled.

"Nope," Kyle agreed, flashing a look at Kagome. Their eyes met, and Kagome quickly averted her eyes. "You should have tried to kiss me, Eri. I'm sure I would have awoken from my enchanted slumber," he said, winking at his girlfriend.

Eri flushed a little, and hastily changed the subject.

Using this opportunity, Kyle thought about what he was going to do. Kagome HIgurashi had no chance of slipping away- no, he'd see to that. He had thought of too many backup plans while he was detained in hospital.

Though the doctors had insisted that he checked into a ward, he was adamant about returning to school as soon as possible. His father, a specialist in neurology, had stepped in to persuade his collegues to let him leave.

"We still haven't discovered what caused your son's fits, sir," one had complained. "Are you sure-?"

"I am sure. I believe _I_ would know more about my child's health than _you_."

Kyle had barely suppressed a smile at that.

Fits- of course they wouldn't find the reason. It was just something he came up with to fit, albeit badly, into the situation.

But had he said that his energy had been forcibly absorbed, more likely than not he'd be sent to a psychiatrist. And that would waste precious time- he absolutely had to confront Higurashi today. Before she came up with another excuse to miss school and disappear, or transfer altogether.

From the corner of his eyes, he saw the said girl stand up. Kyle stood up as well, blocking her path. He saw Kagome falter, and he felt a deluge of confidence.

She had nothing to fear if she had nothing to hide.

"Higurashi," he said, looking pointedly into her eyes. "Eri and I are going to the movies today, and we'll like to make it a double date. Why don't you come with Hojou?" Kyle asked, his eyes moving the the guy. The latter had obviously heard, for he turned a bright shade of pink. Both guys stared at Kagome, waiting for her answer. One smugly, one with heart-racing anticipation.

"I'm seeing someone," Kagome replied hurriedly, attempting to push past Kyle.

There was a slight silence at the table as five people digested that fact.

"Rea-lly," Kyle responded, his voice dripping with skeptism. Kagome stared back into his eyes in defiance. "Then you would bring your _boyfriend_ with you. Eri can't spare you.

"And it just has to be today," Kyle said, dropping his volume, anticipating Kagome's rebuttal. "_Before your delicate immune system succumbs to some rubbish illness."_

Kagome's face became slightly pale. Finally, she dipped her head in agreement, and left.

Kyle slid back into his chair.

"Boyfriend my foot," he muttered, rolling his eyes to no one in particular.

"Oh, I believe it," Hojou muttered, his face downcast. Kyle threw him a scathing look.

"You'd believe _anything_ she says."

Hojou shook his head, his behavior lackluster. It was as if Kagome's declaration had mortally wounded him.

"I believe it's true," Yuka piped up. Ayumi seconded her. "Kagome-chan used to have such a sad expression ever since her two timing boyfriend ditched her. But now…"

"She's much more lighthearted," Eri finished, gaining a surprised look on Kyle. "It's a huge possibility."

Kyle pondered that, but said nothing. The subject was dropped. Later, in low tones, Eri asked why he insisted that Kagome joined them.

His answer was that he needed to find out something.

* * *

"How's this?" Souta asked, pushing Inuyasha into Kagome's room. Kagome ceased pacing and pivoted around to assess Inuyasha.

He squirmed a little under her piercing glare, picking at his collar.

Kagome's nerves were strung, starting since she returned home. That, he could tell. She had pulled him all the way up to Souta's room, and called Soutat to fit some clothes on him- and here he was, in the fifth outfit in ten minutes, his skin itching under the fabric and feeling suffocated. It was either the ridiculously tight shirts Souta owned (it was surprising that he could even fit) or the "old fashioned"  
shirts of her grandpa.

Kagome shook her head, and pulled a jacket on for him, tilting her head a little to inspect the effect. Her hands lingered on his chest, and Inuyasha felt himself beginning to burn up.

"No, this won't do," Kagome moaned, as she gestured for Inuyasha to take off the jacket. "Is there nothing else, Souta?"

Souta replied in the negative, and Kagome almost whacked her head in exasperation. She covered her forehead with her palm, exhaling tiredly.

Inuyasha wanted to know what was bothering her, and ached to see her suffer in silence alone. But with Souta in the room, he felt extra conscious of every glance he shot at Kagome. It sounded even paranoid to think that Souta was staring alternately at the both of them.

"So what's the frenzy for?" he asked at last.

Kagome tiredly looked at him, and explained what had happened to both guys.

"So you're dressing Inuyasha nii-chan for a _movie_, with Kyle and Eri scrutinizing the pair of you?" Souta asked incredulously.

A tired nod of agreement.

"Then you should let Inuyasha nii-chan wear his usual clothes!" Souta said. The 'of course' he missed out was almost audible.

"It. Will. Be. Odd."

"It'd be even weirder if Inuyasha nii-chan doesn't know how to go to the loo with jeans on," Souta muttered. "Imagine if you had to teach him."

Inuyasha flushed, and stared at Kagome. Her face twitched, and their eyes met. She dropped her eyes to the ground quickly.

"Fine," she said in resignation. "Go and change back then."

In Souta's room, Inuyasha leaned against the door and heaved a big sigh. He didn't understand why Kagome felt as if she was avoiding him, as if she was afraid of looking into his eyes, afraid to be near him.

She did return his hug earlier, didn't she? So what was standing in their way now?

He had felt so much earnest need in her just now- Kagome wanted to be around him! Just as he needed to know that she was safe, she had pressed herself close to him for the same reason, no? They both had to know that the other's heart was still beating strongly, that there was nothing to fear now.

Inuyasha knew that he couldn't be wrong. The look hiding in her eyes as she looked at him was confirmation enough. Kagome wanted- needed- him beside her.

Yet why was she shirking away now? As though… she regretted?

Immediately, he berated himself for thinking that. He loved her, and she loved him too- deep down. It was enough.

They descended the stairs together a while later. Inuyasha felt Kagome stiffen as Kyle got up and looked critically between the two of them. Kagome introduced them.

Kyle stared at Inuyasha, and Inuyasha felt an inexplicable sense of dislike for the guy. Or, perhaps, it was due to the simple reason that Kyle was making Kagome unforgettable.

"You're her boyfriend then?" Kyle drawled in a disbelieving tone. "_Inu_yasha?"

"What of it?" Inuyasha challenged, placing his arm around Kagome's hip and pulling her towards him. He heard a small intake of breath, and Kagome's heart missed a beat. His own body was warm from the contact.

He knew that he didn't want to let go.

"Such a close couple," Kyle commented sarcastically, earning a blush from Kagome. "How far have the two of you gone?"

"No further than you and _her_," Inuyasha replied, jerking his head towards Eri. "_If_ it's any of your business."

"Oh, but we've kissed before," Eri commented, looking up nonchalantly.

Inuyasha met Kagome's eyes and saw the heat creeping across her face. His arm, enclosed around Kagome, felt electrified. Kagome was so beautiful, so dear to him…. He had a sudden feeling that he wanted to take her whole. As Inuyasha leaned in, Kagome's eyes widened and shoved him gently away.

Inuyasha's heart fell. His ears drooped beneath the cap he was wearing. He felt almost as if Kagome had just rejected him, placing a wet blanket on his fiery emotions.

It hurt.

But he pretended to smile and firmly caught Kagome's hand as they led the way to the cinema.

_Soon_, he promised himself, sweeping an unhappy glance at the golden locket hanging delicately from Kagome's throat. _Soon_.

* * *

Under the cover of darkness and loud opening tune, Inuyasha stared into Kagome's eyes and asked if she was alright. The concern in his tone was undeniable, but Kagome had not awakened her undiscerning senses. Kagome patted his hand, which was holding one of hers and attempted to smile; but Inuyasha frowned at her attempt and held her hand tighter.

Despite the slight warmth that created in her gut, Kagome sighed. She tried to hid her face from both Eri on her left and Inuyasha on her right, but that failed. She could see from her peripheral vision that Inuyasha had turned to look at her.

In this air conditioned, comfy cinema, she could, perhaps, loosen up a little. Unless Inuyasha plucked out Tessaiga and waved it at the screen, this was perhaps the safest place yet.

Kagome sighed again, softly.

It was a fiasco so far- there was truly no other word for it. Who knew that the journey of fifteen minutes to the cinema could be so eventful? She thought, grimacing.

One, Inuyasha almost about insisted that he should carry her when Kagome almost sprained her ankle in her heels. Sure, it was sweet- but Inuyasha probably didn't consider that humans have not so much strength to spare.

Two, the shocked, awed look on Inuyasha's face as he took the lift could not have been missed. The fact that the lift moved up on its own accord and that the doors opened to a different scene than before was almost too much for Inuyasha to absorb- and Kagome had the dreadful feeling that Kyle saw this, and registered it.

It probably didn't help that, when Kagome's movie ticket dropped below a vending machine, Inuyasha had the strength to tilt the machine 45 degrees for her to reach it. And that she had forgot to think of a good excuse why Kagome paid for the tickets, rather than her boyfriend.

Oh, and chuck in the fact that Inuyasha didn't know that Kyle meant by 3D, contact lenses, or that his hair was silver naturally, and that he did not wear shoes.

It wasn't Inuyasha's fault- of course it wasn't. Everything was so new to him, and the movie date came at such a short notice for any proper planning to have happened.

Perhaps that's why Kyle insisted for them to go today- Kagome had the dreadful feeling Kyle could see through them and her excuses, and felt really really stressed.

What he was planning to do, Kagome hadn't a clue. She didn't even dare to think about the possibilities.

Inuyasha saw her tense form, and tried to sooth her, gripping her hand comfortably tight.

"Relax," he murmured into her ear, giving her an encouraging smile.

Kagome felt her heart pound extra hard as she returned a genuine smile.

Somehow she hadn't been able to do that ever since Inuyasha hugged her earlier. Her thoughts were jumbled, bits of pieces of her crying out for such different things that it simply added to her nerves going haywire. Since then, she couldn't seem to want to keep her hands off Inuyasha- Kagome found herself eager to hold his hand, wanting to touch his ears, his face…

But she had too much discipline for that. Kagome couldn't indulge her feelings when she had no clue where they came from.

In fact, the emotions scared her. As if it didn't belong to her, as if she was wrong to feel that.

But it didn't make sense, not at all.

Kagome got a nudge from Eri. "Are you not watching the show?"

"I am," Kagome assured her, as she put an end to her musings and stared at the screen intently.

The movie was New Moon, based on Stephanie Meyer's novel.

Kagome had a strange feeling in her chest as she watched how Edward left Bella, leaving her all alone in the forest to deal with the grief. Her chest felt constricted, and her breath hitched. Suddenly a flood of tears cascaded down her face. Kagome felt a deep sorrow at once foreign but similar. She had the sudden sensation that she was not crying for merely the girl in the screen, but someone closer to heart.

_Me,_ she suddenly realized, as she had a flashback of herself staring after a figure in red. She was on her knees, her heart torn to bits. _Just like this girl…_ She tried to catch the evading memories, but they slipped away into oblivion.

"Kagome-chan, here," Eri said, handing Kagome a packet of tissues in concern. Kagome accepted it with thanks. Kyle was staring with some surprise at her, making her feel awkward.

"That scene made me want to cry somehow," Kagome tried to explain. Eri nodded.

"For me too. But you, Kaogme-chan, cried exceptionally hard…"

Kagome turned to hide her face from both Kyle and Eri, only to see Inuyasha gazing at her. There was something fervent in his eyes, and he gripped her hand even tighter. There was another flashback- this time of a silver haired hanyou before her, with all emotions wiped off his face.

It was gone as soon as it came. Kagome was left staring into Inuyasha's torn eyes. Regret. Pain.

The air conditioning suddenly felt very cold.

Kagome shivered, as she looked away. As if on reflex, Inuyasha took of the Robe of the Fire Rat and placed it gently upon her shoulders.

She looked up at him again, seeking an explanation from his face. Kagome didn't understand- the flashbacks didn't make sense, but Kagome realized for the first time that she must have forgotten something big. Something she must have been afraid to know…

_Something between her and Inuyasha._

"I don't understand," she heard herself say, as she withdrew her hand from Inuyasha.

Inuyasha's face darkened a little, but his unwavering gaze forced Kagome to look him in the face.

"Edward may have been trying for an equilibrium in his own way," Inuyasha said. "Just like the Mienai. He tried to create a situation best for both of them- or, in a way, he perhaps saw it as his duty to protect her… Her self, not her heart."

Inuyasha's face turned troubled.

"He's making the wrong choice," he whispered, almost inaudible now. "I'd know," he added, as he saw Jacob make Bella smile and lead her out of the void of pain.

"I'd know."

Kagome felt a strange twinge in her chest and an urge to cry again. She suppressed it with some difficulty, but she had a strange feeling that she related to this movie, and what Inuyasha said… Through personal experience.

* * *

"Well, Higurashi?" Kyle prompted, as he stared at Kagome emotionlessly. "Or do you want me to confront you with some vital statistics?"

He cleared his throat as he eyed his classmate. Kagome seemed rooted to the floor- statue like, if you may. She seemed as if she couldn't believe that she was caught in this situation, confronted by someone who knew her secrets… and could cause her to lose everything.

Kyle was pushing her into a corner. He was forcing her to faceoff with him. And he knew that he had to be wary- if he didn't control this situation well, it could turn nasty. After all, he didn't know the extent of her powers. Yet.

"Gingivitis. A twisted back. Brain hemorrhage," he said sarcastically. "And that's just some of the recent ones. Tuberculosis? Dengue fever?" he added. "Do they ring a bell, Higurashi Kagome?"

Kagome said nothing, but Kyle didn't miss how her eyes shot to the washroom entrance, or her glance to search for Inuyasha. _Inuyasha_, he scoffed in his mind. _Nice name._

As they were leaving the cinema, Kagome had realized that she had dropped her wallet. Inuyasha promised to find it for her; he was going to retrace their steps from the cashier on, he said.

Eri tried to tell him where to meet them, but he didn't listen. Kyle heard him whisper to his _girlfriend _that he'd find her.

And now, he could almost hear Kagome pleading frantically for Eri to come out of the washroom. Figuratively.

"Don't try anything, Higurashi," he murmured, taking a single step closer to her. "You know you can't get away with this. If you co-operate, I may just promise to help you."

Kagome looked up at him, disbelieving.

"I've figured out so much- don't count on the school being inefficient forever," Kyle said with a smile. "They are bound to check hospital records soon."

After a long pause, Kagome whispered, "How did you know so much?"

Kyle smiled at her tensed look.

"My mother settles the admin in school," he whispered, as Kagome backed away into the railing. "Are you ready to answer questions or not?"

Kagome swallowed, before giving a slight nod.

"Where do you go when you claim to be ill?"

"To the feudal era."

"How?"

"There's a well behind my house that only I can cross."

"And Inuyasha," Kyle stated, as he watched Kagome jump. She couldn't seriously have believed him so blind to Inuyasha's expressions, speech and behavior, could she? "He belongs to the other side, the feudal era. Why does he have so much strength?" he mused.

"He isn't exactly human?" he suggested, when Kagome was silent.

"Hanyou."

Kyle took a deep breath and nodded slowly.

"Dog demon?"

"Indeed."

"Then the one earlier today?" Kyle asked, starting to pace around Kagome. The rate at which he was understanding was agitating.

"Then the one earlier today?"

"A demon- it's commonly called Mienai. They used to balance the demon-human ration," Kagome murmured. "This one ran amok and was sealed. The seal was accidentally broken recently, I believe."

"You destroyed the… Mienai."

Kagome dipped her head.

"Show me what you can do."

"There aren't any demons here. And don't even think about using Inuyasha," she said, with a slight viciousness at the end.

"What kind of power?"

"Purification."

"And the healing?"

Kagome laid her hand on his without a word. As a bright golden glow erupted from her palm, the muscles he strained fighting off the Mienai was gone. Kyle chuckled in appreciation. Kagome made no response.

"What's keeping you in the feudal era?" he continued.

Kagome sighed and described the situation with Naraku as briefly as possible.

Kyle exhaled slowly. He could see Inuyasha turn the corner and stride towards Kagome. Within seconds, he was hovering over Kagome protectively.

"What are you doing to her?" Inuyasha growled. "Kagome's so tense…"

Kyle shrugged, eyeing the cap meaningfully. Kagome caught his stare and reached for the cap. In one stroke, the two furry white ears stood unshielded, exposed clearly to Kyle's wide eyes.

"Evidence enough?" Kagome asked, as she returned the cap to Inuyasha. She seemed braver knowing Inuyasha was there beside her. That Inuyasha's presence gave her strength.

Kyle nodded. Eri was coming out now, looking around for the others.

"What are you planning to do?"

"Nothing, I guess," Kyle said, smiling earnestly at her for the first time. He passed Kagome a namecard, his mother's. "My mother will try to hold off any enquiries to the hospital. But that's perhaps the limit we can do- the rest it's up to you."

Kagome reached for the card, looking surprised. "You are not going to tell on me?"

Eri had spotted them, and began walking over.

"No. It's enough to have my suspicions proven right, for now."

Kagome nodded. "Can we leave?"

"Woah,woah," Kyle replied comically. "You forgot to beg me to keep this a secret!"

Kagome raised her eyebrows at him.

"This sounds weird but I trust your discretion," Kagome responded, pulling on Inuyasha's hand. "I may be absent tomorrow."

"Try something more commonplace," he suggested, as the pair walked away.

Eri linked her hands in his and stared after the two of them with Kyle.

"So… did you find out? What she was doing?"

Kyle stared into Eri's eyes with a grin.

"Saving Japan," he laughed. "Come on, Eri, let's have dinner."

* * *

**Hi all, so sorry for updating so late. My excuses are posted on my profile, and apart from begging everyone for a review (do you think this chapter was a disappointment after the previous one? I'm so sorry if you do... *looks away guiltily*) I would like to ask readers who are interested in seeing more works of mine in the future to poll on my profile... I have a few story ideas that I wish to start on after Protected Pain, and I would like to know which you want to see posted first! ^^ Do try to stop by and give me suggestions. Thank you very much for reading Protected Pain. Approx 2 chapters til the end!**


	19. Standstill

**Dislcaimer: I don't own Inuyasha. I'd be beaten to a pulp.**

**Happy Valentine's day everyone! Hope you enjoy the second last chapter of Protected Pain. To all the people following this, thank you so much. Appreciate it a lot.**

**Chapter 19: Standstill**

* * *

Kagome couldn't keep the smile from her face. From behind her, Inuyasha grumbled something but she didn't care.

"Come on, Inuyasha," Kagome urged, giggling at his pout. She extended her hand to him, her face angelic.

Inuyasha's mind wavered, and he automatically gave it to her.

Kagome's hand held his tightly, and without warning, she started sprinting again. She laughed at the fact that he was dragged for several steps before he fell into step beside her.

"I don't get why you don't want me to carry you," he muttered. "We'd reach much faster."

Kagome smiled at him, sending electric waves down Inuyasha's heart.

"But I am exhilarated, Inuyasha. There's so much energy in me- I just can't hold still!"

Inuyasha rolled his eyes at her affectionately.

"At least you had enough sense to remove those ridiculous shoes," he muttered. Kagome didn't reply, but they raced hand in hand back to the Higurashi shrine.

Inuyasha noticed once more with a pang all the little changes Kagome had undergone since he left. Her spiritual powers had been so much strengthened, not to mention her physical abilities. The speed at which she ran at consistently back home- though extremely slow compared to his maximum speed- was much quicker than before. Kagome would hold her own with Sango. Her stamina had improved greatly too. It was ironic, in a way. His leaving managed to benefit her in that little aspect. But henceforth… he would not leave her side again.

With as little words as possible and a record breaking timing, Kagome packed in all the ninja food and went to the well house with Inuyasha in tow.

Kagome couldn't help it as her ecstatic feelings overcame her. The sense of release, the knowledge that it was all going to turn out fine… It almost overwhelmed her with joy. Kagome beckoned to Inuyasha, jumping into the well. The situation which seemed so bleak moments ago, the fate of two worlds which hung from so thin a thread, it was safe! Kagome was so exhilarated she wanted to sprint, wanted to laugh, wanted to burst into song. Behind her, Inuyasha jumped in after her.

She didn't realize it then, but once she let down her guard, a very different sort of emotion rose within Kagome's chest. Not anticipating it, Kagome did not recognize it as it stirred and blended itself with her relief. No, Kagome wouldn't have realized what this emotion was- to the current her, this emotion was new. It originated from the past, sealed within the locket.

Love and relief gave rise to care-freeness and adrenaline.

She climbed out and stared at the familiar surroundings. Every wood, even the chirp of the birds, every thing of this place. A strong surge of emotion rose to her throat. All were dear to her. Everyone here. Everything here.

Her eyes shone with joy, and she couldn't suppress it further- she threw her arms around Inuyasha and held him tight.

She felt Inuyasha stiffen and pulled away instantly. Kagome looked up at the hanyou and saw his features fixed in lines of surprise. It was as if she was suddenly doused with ice water- Kagome smiled sheepishly.

"Sorry," she murmured, before pulling up her backpack and bounding towards Kaede's hut.

She didn't hear a hint of Inuyasha's pursuit.

Mentally, she sighed. It had felt so right- but it was wrong of her to have breeched that personal space. After all, Inuyasha had Kikyo, didn't he? She probably didn't respect that by throwing her arms around him, Kagome thought, chagrined.

_But didn't Inuyasha embrace her too, earlier today?_

Kagome shook her head, remembering what Inuyasha had said earlier- _"I just don't want someone close to me to die again."_ That must be it. She allowed that wild temptation to run free, allowed her body to indulge herself.

Wrongly. Now Inuyasha will probably shun away from her.

At that thought, a wave of sadness filled her heart and Kagome blinked in surprise.

_Did it matter to her so much if Inuyasha didn't care?_

Lost in her contemplations, Kagome tripped over a particularly pointed rock. Kagome felt a squeak rise up in her throat as her body flailed a little, unsupported and pulled towards the ground by gravity.

Before she could close her eyes or use her arms to cushion the fall, a pair of strong arms scooped her up bridal style. Kagome's head spun, disorienting her a little.

"Kagome, are you alright?"

Kagome blinked several times before she registered that it was Inuyasha who was holding her.

Her heart pounded.

"Yeah… thanks," she replied, feeling flustered for some reason. "You… can put me down now."

Kagome counted two heartbeats before Inuyasha replied.

"And if I don't want to?"

Inuyasha continued walking towards the village, not releasing Kagome. She flushed. _Five heartbeats._

"Okay…"

_Three heartbeats._

"Are you comfortable?"

_Six heartbeats._

"… yeah."

Inuyasha stopped under the shade of a tree and stared into Kagome's face. Kagome felt her face heat up as she stared back. There was something alight in Inuyasha's features. Hope.

"Have you regained your memories, Kagome?" he whispered at last.

Kagome found herself entranced in those golden orbs.

"What memories?"

Inuyasha's eyes clouded over just a tiny bit.

"… Nothing," he murmured, gently placing a kiss on her forehead. "You'll remember soon enough."

* * *

"Stop trying to kid yourself, Koga," Ayame grumbled, tilting Koga's face to see Inuyasha and Kagome walk to the village together. "You. Don't. Stand. A. Chance."

Koga's heart trembled, and he barely resisted the need to clutch at his chest. The ice was growing, its pointy tips jabbing into his heart. Ayame was vocalizing what Koga had known a long time ago.

But it still hurt. And it hurt him even more to watch Inuyasha get the girl whom he hurt so badly, while, he, Koga, the one guarding over her, was nothing more than a friend.

Koga sighed.

If anything had helped to make up his mind, it was that scene just now. You didn't need to be a genius to register the emotions beneath the surface- and anyhow, it was publically displayed. You needed to be as thick as Inuyasha not to notice, Koga thought with a twisted grimace.

But if he hadn't been forced to watch by Ayame, would he just shake it off and put on a smile, as if nothing happened? Just to hang around the girl he loved a little longer? It was pathetic that he couldn't stop staying around her, beyond his reach that Kagome was. It only did hurt him.

"I'll go back to see your grandfather, Ayame," he said without looking at her. He could see the two ponytails of red hair swing over- her eyes were undoubtedly fixed on him, accessing the truth of his statement.

"I will," he repeated, glancing into her eyes. "Just… go first, okay? I'll catch up with you."

Ayame rose a single eyebrow.

"Really. Ginta and Hakkaku will make me," he murmured, nodding at them. Ayame appraised him, before he got up. The two wolves shuffled to one side to make space for her.

"I'll be leaving then," Ayame said. Koga didn't say anything, his eyes not moving from the patch of grass, now empty, before him. "I'm sorry for pouring salt into your wounds, but… you have to see the truth."

Koga made no response.

Ayame threw him a parting glance, and left with her wolves.

Koga stood up slowly, systematically dusting off dirt with his hands.

"Which of you mentioned Kagome?" Koga asked conversationally.

Ginta and Hakkaku shrunk a bit further from Koga, eyeing each other nervously.

Koga glanced at them and chuckled humorlessly.

"Relax. It's just that she didn't have to follow both of you- two would be more than enough to tell me that her grandfather was ill."

"Sorry boss."

Koga smiled weakly and waved it away, heading for the hut. As he neared, he heard the cheerful banter between Inuyasha and Kagome. A lump rose in his throat.

He stepped in and explained to the others that he had to go. Somehow he managed to lock a smile onto his face, and he didn't stutter when looking at Kagome sent a pang to his chest.

He made his excuses, and Ginta and Hakkaku bowed to leave. As he turned, he felt a warm hand press into his.

_Kagome._

"Take care, Koga-kun," Kagome said, looking earnestly into his eyes.

It took a moment for him to find his voice. He let his hand run down her face gently, the last goodbye. "You too, Kagome."

Then, he lifted the flap and walked outside. He didn't look at Inuyasha- he didn't want to. He only wanted Kagome in his memories of today.

As Koga began to run, he felt a mixture of emotions swell from within his chest. He remembered how Kagome's lips felt on his, how he had clung to her when she woke up in tears. How Kagome's face was contorted with worry when he fell, bleeding, from protecting her against Goshinki. Tears pooled up at the edge of his eyelids_. He loved her. Truly. But obviously love couldn't be helped. What could he do?_

And also how she'd asked if he was just drunk when he kissed her, Koga remembered as his heart twisted in agony. How Kagome had cried harder when she looked up to find him rather than Inuyasha. How she chose Inuyasha again, after all he had done…

The tears pooled over and splashed down his cheeks. The salt stung his eyes, and Koga wiped the tears away in surprise. Never before did the twisting pain give way to tears. Not even when the rest of his pack was massacred. Now, for not getting a human girl's love…

Since when had he fallen so deeply in love with Kagome? How long was it since he saw her as Kagome, rather than just a suitable female to bear his young and help locate the shards? How long since she became a sweet drug to him, when he cared too much to keep away, and would sacrifice his own happiness to retain the smile on her face? How long had it been since he'd passed the point of no return?

The tears fell once more, and Koga wiped them away resolutely. He had to smother the tears now- he'd caught up with Ayame.

Not that he'd get over it in a while…

But he'd reserve it for later. There was still one thing in his way from total depression.

_When the seal from Kagome's locket breaks…

* * *

_

Time passed, but Kagome and Inuyasha's relationship was at a standstill. Inuyasha had realized that Kagome had not regained her memories, and Kagome realized that something was kept from her deliberately. After that single day of indulging herself in a frantic bid to get answers, she'd mellowed down. There was no point trying, was there? No one, especially not Inuyasha, told her what she wanted to know.

Kagome felt occasional bursts of sorrow in her heart, and her heart quickened erratically when Inuyasha was close. She began to have frequent flashbacks- concluding always with a pang in her chest and the locket emanating an icy cold.

Kagome didn't get it, and began to keep away.

When Sango and Kagome bathed in the hot springs, Sango had randomly asked her if she loved Inuyasha.

All Kagome could say was "My body seems to love him very much, but my mind doesn't. It's very conflicting- I seem to know that I should love him, but I don't know why."

"But your heart races when he's close and you crave for his presence?"

"My heart, yes. My mind, no."

Inuyasha heard them, and saw little hope.

There was no way, no way he could even begin to explain it all to Kagome. And Kagome will continue resenting him from keeping knowledge from her.

Koga was gone, and he himself was truly in love with Kagome, yet the seal didn't break either.

But for all he dismayed, it wasn't necessary.

He didn't know it, but it was almost time.


	20. Affections Touching Across Time

**Disclaimer: This chapter is largely based on Rumiko Takahashi's Affections touching across Time! Also, there is a quote from Breaking Dawn embedded in the chapter- I shall admit that when I wrote that scene, the first thing that popped into my head was that- I felt that I just had to add it. But the judges are still out for whether that was a good decision... ^^**

**Hi all, thanks for sticking with Protected Pain til the very end. Millions of thank yous to all who have reviewed, added the story to alerts or favourites, etc. (*bows*)  
****This will be the final chapter of Protected Pain, no epilogue or anything. I hope everyone is satisfied with my work in this chapter (largely based on the first movie, but I have changed several parts, especially the end)- if you are not, do tell me, and perhaps I could do some touchup or edit it in the future. Thank you all. Now, chapter 20! **

**Chapter 20: Affections Touching Across Time**

* * *

When Inuyasha found Kagome by Goshinkobu, it was not after Kikyo he chased, but Kagome. After getting pissed off with Inuyasha, Kagome had set off in disgruntlement towards the well, but strayed towards the sacred tree instead.

The tree seemed to hold much importance. Memories.

But not all were happy.

She pricked her finger against something embedded in the trunk as she trailed her fingers around the tree, trying to remember what was sorrowful about this place.

But she hadn't much time to wonder. Menomaru appeared a moment later, and both she and Inuyasha were in danger. Soon after, she passed out.

There was little time to ponder anything; first, she had to fight her captors. Next, she had to escape for her life when Menomaru went after Inuyasha's neck- when Menomaru began the inheritance process and no one in the area was safe. Least of whom, the gang. They were thrown in all directions by the force of the attack directed at Inuyasha, there was no point in trying to find the others.

Weakened and terribly battered, Kagome had barely hidden from the onslaught of moths heading to Kaede's village. With the last of her strength, Kagome carried the unconscious Shippo back to the village for help.

As the blackness of her eyes closed in on her, Kagome was overcome by a sense of worry. It clutched at her heart and twisted her stomach.

Worry… for Inuyasha.

* * *

Inuyasha's eyes opened to sunlight. Myoga was still hanging from a string to his beads of subjugation, and was nagging for him to flee. He barely heard it though. His eyes swept his surroundings carefully.

No Kagome.

As Inuyasha cringed at the jolt of pain from his wounds- sharper than he'd felt it in a long while- Menomaru's words drifted into his mind.

"_I've planned an exciting way to end your life."_

Inuyasha swallowed. If anything happened to Kagome…

"We will need to leave for the west and train for 200 years like he did, before we have a chance of beating him!"

That he registered, and his body reacted with a growl. Was it his youkai blood or human heart that rebelled against the idea of flight? He was no coward- he would never back away. He could fight, even if he couldn't win.

A burst of rage coursed through him, as he thought of how Tessaiga had been manipulated to work for Menomaru. That he'd never take standing down. No way the bastard was going to wreck havoc in the world even indirectly caused by himself.

But the thought that was harder to stand was 200 years. Kagome would be dead by then.

_He wasn't going to make the same mistake twice._

Inuyasha flung Myoga from him, his mind made up.

* * *

Kagome twisted uncomfortably on the mat, her head drenched in perspiration. A high shrill rang in her ears, and her forehead was splitting. Her stomach turned as she threatened to throw up.

It hurt so much she couldn't think. Why couldn't she just fall asleep? _No. If she slept, she would succumb…_

A fire began burning across her temples and she groaned.

"Water…"

As Kaede went to fetch water, Kagome's eyes burned in their sockets. Kagome tried to lift her hand to clutch at her forehead- but her hands were immobile. Summoning all her energy, Kagome attempted to push the crushing force away from her head.

It failed. An invisible weight crashed through her, stunning her.

Suddenly, the pain muted.

It was an eerie feeling, as Kagome felt her body move. The limbs that refused to obey her seconds before moved by themselves. Queer- she could barely feel the rest of her body. As if it had been numbed for too long. In fact, the only place she was was in her head; a tiny corner in her head, one that had no voice of itself.

Her body moved towards Kaede, and Kagome registered in horror Kaede's panicked eyes, and the scent of blood as Kaede fell. She screamed in her head, screamed for Kaede to run, screamed for her body to stop, but her body didn't yield.

She felt her body continue floating, as her heart clenched in fear. It brought her some place foreign to her, and Kagome briefly wondered while battling for control whether she was heading for Menomaru.

_But it wasn't to be._

Someone very familiar stood on the other side of the hanging bridge.

_Inuyasha._

Dread rose like bile to her throat, suffocating her. An image of what happened to Kaede forced itself to her eyes. Suddenly, she realized what had been staring at her for a long while.

_Inuyasha was going to die by her hand._

Kagome battered for control as a sob stuck in her throat. Inuyasha was walking towards her, concern etching in every line of his face. His demeanour spelt relief, as he spoke words that she couldn't clearly hear. She screamed for him to run, to go.

_He couldn't hear._

An icy cold compressed tightly onto her heart, and Kagome was suddenly aware of the locket by her chest. It was almost pulsating at the same time as her heart. The pain that was so numbed by the body which she had no control of screamed out from the locket.

From plain dread and worry, it exploded into a full-scale physical pain- the locket awakened her heart, keening together, where none could hear but herself.

Her heart came back. The one which had shattered many times over, the one which belonged wholly to Inuyasha.

_Ba-bump. Ba-bump._

Her body pressed against Inuyasha's gently, earning a surprised expression from the hanyou. Then his face changed to that of peace, of affection, deaf to Kagome's pleas.

The locket pulsed again, hard, as a surge of memories returned.

She saw it now, memories that were sealed within the locket. The love which overflowed from the small golden heart- her love for Inuyasha, their love… It engulfed her.

The places she was touching Inuyasha began to burn.

She loved the hanyou before her. So much, so much.

But her body would kill him.

"Run… Inuyasha…"

Iron claw-like extensions protruded from her fingers and cut through Inuyasha's flesh. Blood spurted- Kagome's body screamed as Inuyasha crumbled. It felt as if her body was torn too, watching as the one true love of her life fall under her hands.

But her body continued the onslaught, unwavering, flawless as polished armour.

Inuyasha backed away over and over again, barely ducking quickly enough to escape her attacks.

_Why didn't he run-!_

Another memory floated back to her.

_Hadn't she done the same?_

In Kaguya's castle, while Inuyasha was being controlled. Under the risk of being torn into pieces, hadn't she run up to him? Hadn't she stayed beside him? Hadn't she endured the pain he unknowingly inflicted, in a bid to rewaken the human in him?

Kagome's eyes moistened as Inuyasha ducked over and over again.

_Memories continued attacking her mind._

_Barely suppressed jealousy when Inuyasha chose Kikyo over and over again- how she wished she could either be free of her love for him, or that Inuyasha would choose once and for all- let the pain come, once and for all. She just had to know if he cared in the least…_

_The twisting pain when Inuyasha left for Kikyo._

_Hadn't he felt her kiss? Hadn't he felt her overflowing emotions? Or had she made it all up in her mind? All along, Inuyasha only saw her as Kikyo's… substitute?_

_And when Kikyo died, all Inuyasha could think of over and over again was Kikyo. She had tried to respect his grief, to give him his space, but that agonizing pain when her heart had overflowed with affection. Inuyasha had flung her from him… When all she needed was to know he was safe…_

She cried.

But it was meaningless now. So what if Inuyasha had been safe from Goshinki then?

The threat was her now.

* * *

The bridge fell, and before Inuyasha decided whether he could reach Kagome to save her, he was pulled towards the river below. With a grimace, he watched Kagome's body hang in mid-air. If there was one thing he needed to thank Menomaru, it'd be keeping Kagome safe as he used her as his puppet.

The situation wasn't that gloomy yet- if Menomaru had killed Kagome to get to him…

Inuyasha hopped onto a rock, but the impact made his numerous wounds hurt. Wincing, he leapt away nimbly as Kagome soared towards him, continuing the onslaught.

Perhaps this was some form of punishment for him, Inuyasha decided. He was getting what he deserved for hurting Kagome so deeply before. Inuyasha grimaced again as he felt his healing wounds split open again. It was okay, if that was the case. Anyway, he shouldn't be allowed the prize so early. It wouldn't be fair if he'd hurt Kagome so many times before, yet she simply forgives him…

He ducked as Kagome attacked him again.

He was bleeding too quickly to heal himself- the youkai attacks through Kagome's body were taking their toll on him. Of course he'd had worse- but this time, he couldn't fight back. This time, all he could do was hope to get Kagome out of the trance, all he could do was run. His hands were pinned.

That slimy bastard Menomaru didn't even bother to fight him face to face. Underhanded worm!

He was near Goshinkobu again, and this time, he took the attack full on.

With a soft "ugh!" he fell against the sacred tree, his head spinning, his breath short.

Someone in red approached.

His eyes were blurry, and his mind supplied an image of Kikyo with her bow, sealing him here fifty years past.

He blinked.

No, this was Kagome.

He exhaled a small sigh.

A bow materialized in mid-air, and Kagome's arrow was drawn.

… There was nowhere to run, was there?

Inuyasha stared at the girl before him. Perhaps this was his retribution for making her cry those countless of times. She'd never complained once, had she? Never before had she retaliated; over and over again, she'd been there when he needed her, but when had he ever comforted her when she needed it?

Yet, even now, she was trying to protect him.

Inuyasha watched as Kagome's bow fell to the ground. She spasmed and shuddered, as her body haltingly reached for her weapons. He heard her as she asked him to run. She could not control her body.

But run? Was there a point in drawing this out?

He thought he'd had a chance, but he was wrong. Just like he couldn't raise a finger to hurt Kikyo, he couldn't hurt Kagome to save his own life. The pain that he would voluntarily inflict on himself many times over, he couldn't use a thousandth to hurt Kagome.

_You could run from someone you feared, you could rty to fight someone you hated. When you loved the one who was killing you, it left you no options. How could you run, how could you fight, when doing so would hurt that beloved one? If your life was all you had to give your beloved, how could you not give it?_

_If it was someone you truly loved?_

"Stop asking me to run! I'm not leaving without you."

Kagome's shivers ceased, and she wielded the weapons in her practiced fingers once again. But her chocolate brown eyes swam in tears, and pain etched in every muscle.

Being manipulated must hurt greatly. But she shouldn't have to feel pain because of him again… Not after he'd broken her heart so many times.

If the only way to free her was his death… why not? At least he'd know that Kagome still lived.

_I love you, Kagome._

The arrow soared towards him, and Kagome cried his name. As the arrow embedded within his heart, Inuyasha saw a bright pink glow burst from Kagome- and simultaneously, something chipped off from her forehead. Was the light Kagome's purifying energy? It felt warm…

_Darkness._

* * *

Koga's tears began to fall uncontrollably. Turning hastily from Ginta and Hakkaku, he slunk away into the woods, away from the prying eyes of other wolves.

His breath shuddered, and his heart spasmed. The tears trailed down his cheeks in a shiny line, but Koga made no attempt to brush it off.

So this was the feeling of rejection, losing everything…

He knew that the seal was broken. Of course it was. He got the same sensation when the seal was created, and now that the seal was broken, it returned full blast at him.

All his love for Kagome assaulted his heart like razors. It hurt him even to think of Kagome… Her beautiful smiles, her eyes… all…

The tears flowed even more mercilessly, but Koga didn't stem their flood.

He knew that this was the last time he'd shed tears over Kagome again.

From now, Kagome would be happy. He'd wish her joy.

The love would never truly fade, that he was sure. But the next time he was her, he'd be smiling. Who cares, eventually, what his heart wanted? He didn't.

As long as Kagome was in a better place.

* * *

Kagome slowly opened the door to the well house. It was snowing, the entire scene before her white with snow. Her heart was heavy, her footsteps were slow. Her mind was weighed down with newly recovered memories.

She was home. Somewhere… without Inuyasha.

Kaede had found her on her knees before Inuyasha's limp body, her eyes frozen in horror and her face ashen pale. She couldn't raise her hand to heal Inuyasha, nor could she speak a single word. Her head buzzed, and her vision went blurry at times. She saw, but nothing registered. She supposed Kaede must have led her to the well. Now, the suffocating blanket on her mind began to lift. The memories suffused her mind. Her heart keened and tore into pieces.

Her feet led the way to the sacred tree.

Kagome pulled the locket from her neck and stared at it. It was finally open.

It was this locket that protected Inuyasha at Kaguya's castle. It was the locket which Koga used to shield her from pain… It was here that Inuyasha threw it onto the ground.

Kagome's heart ached thinking about it.

It was as if a great jolt of lightning coursed through her body when she looked up.

_Inuyasha…?_

No, that was just her imagination.

She'd never see Inuyasha again. She'd never hold Inuyasha again.

_Never again feel his hand on her, his arms around her, his lips against hers… She'll never lose herself in his eyes again._

She shuddered as a great wave of grief overwhelmed her. She fell into the snow gathering on the ground, weak…

* * *

It was a strange sensation in his chest, as Inuyasha's mind cleared. His body didn't seem to hurt anymore.

His ears twitched a little as he sensed a familiar body nearby.

Kagome's.

Her presence was so close, so imposing on his heart… Though he couldn't sniff her out, he realized that.

"_Inuyasha…"_

His eyes snapped open to see Kagome curled into a ball nearby. She was shaking.

_Kagome._

He got up slowly, edging forward until he was on his knees before her. His foot came into something golden. The locket. Inuyasha stared at Kagome, as his body filled with adrenaline.

"Hey."

Kagome looked up and her eyes widened.

"_Inuyasha?"_

"Of course," he murmured, leaning in to look into her eyes. Kagome blushed and leaned a little backwards. His ears fell.

"Ka-"

"_I'm sorry for firing at you,"_ Kagome said. _"Does it still hurt?"_

Inuyasha shook his head as he sat beside Kagome. For a moment, silence reigned. Kagome fidgeted uneasily.

"_You don't have to stay here against your will, Inuyasha-"_

"Haven't you regained your memories?"

"_Precisely because of that. Stop staying because Kikyo wanted you to-"_

Inuyasha's heart soared, and in a swift action, he cupped Kagome's face in his hands and tilted her face to his. He could feel his heart racing as he watched Kagome's cheeks flush crimson.

"What if I'm staying for you? Kagome, and no one else?" he asked, his voice rough. Kagome's eyes widened, but before she could say anything, Inuyasha pressed his lips against hers.

He could feel his blood burning up, his heart threatening to pound right through his chest.

"I need you here with me, Kagome. Haven't you realized that yet?"

Kagome trembled beneath his touch, and clung tightly to him. Inuyasha wrapped his arms gently around her until she stopped shaking.

"_I get to stay with you forever?"_

"Forever."

Kagome broke into a weak smile, and kissed him back.

Inuyasha could see the shadow of pain beneath her brown eyes still, when he helped her out of the well. There was so much hurt he brought to her, she'd never be the same again. He could still see a bit of hesitation in her as she accepted the hand he extended.

Of course she would- having convinced herself and been convinced that the woman he loved was Kikyo.

He squeezed her hand affectionately.

But with all his heart, he loved her. He'll prove it to her. Starting now… ending when his last breath was taken.

"I love you, Kagome."

* * *

**The end! Thanks for reading, and please review!... Love you all. ^^**


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